About Experts Sitemap - Group 33 - Page 2 2014-09-30

Lesbian Life: falling for her, lesbian right, word around town
lesbian right, word around town, homophob: Hello Jenna, This is a tough situation to be in. Chances are that if she was homophobic before, then she may be straight. Granted, she could have just been scared about the whole thing. Try not to read too much into anything she may say or do right now...

Lesbian Life: my friends not ok with it, being a woman, pat on the back
being a woman, pat on the back, best friend: Hello Courtney, People tend to fear things that they don t know about and can t understand. Your best friend probably wants to understand it and not feel weird about it, but doesn t know how to get past it; she s going to need some help from you. The hard...

Lesbian Life: Girlfriend wants to be top, london girl, 5th anniversary
london girl, 5th anniversary, intimate time: Dear Worried, You are smart to want to resolve these issues before getting married. Without knowing either of you I can only read between the lines and point out what I see. First of all, most relationships suffer sexually over time because we do get...

Lesbian Life: Is my girlfriend cheating, friendly relationship, straight face
friendly relationship, straight face, lots of money: Hello Agnes, Well I cannot tell you whether or not your girlfriend is cheating with certainty either way. However, if she is investing most of her time with a friend, as in the past, or if you are 100% sure that she is trying to cover up this communication...

Lesbian Life: Im a lesbian but fantasize mostly about penis's, lesbian, bisexual
lesbian, bisexual, sexual fluidity: Thanks for your question. I m glad you are open about your attractions and are not limiting yourself. This kind of thing is only confusing when we feel that we have to fit certain rules of sexual identity. When in reality, we define our own sexuality and...

Lesbian Life: Keke, best friends, sexuality
best friends, sexuality, wit: Dear Could, Recognizing that she really wants to “be there” for you, but that she cannot give you “100 percent” (as she puts it), is key and worth hearing above all else she says and especially, above the dreams that are going-on inside your own head....

Lesbian Life: Lesbian, inner peace, meeting women
inner peace, meeting women, meeting places: I think everyone has their own normal, you are judging yourself on what you are worrying about everyone else is thinking. My question to you is, do you feel like yourself? Is it making you feel different in a bad way or is it feeling like your true normal?...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian but dating a guy..., lesbian, bisexual
lesbian, bisexual, sexual fluidity: Hi there, Thanks for your question. You ll be happy to know this kind of thing is pretty common, its just something we don t talk about much because our society likes us all to be neatly labelled. It s great that you are not limiting your romantic relationship...

Lesbian Life: Life is so funny, calculus class, strong feeling
calculus class, strong feeling, minority group: Hi, I am not sure if you are asking me a question or just venting. Its never a good thing when we like someone but know that they will not like us back. Its better than telling her your feelings and getting hurt at the end. So are you sure that you are...

Lesbian Life: am i a lesbian?, straight woman, 18 years old
straight woman, 18 years old, pretty girl: Hi Christine, I am sure this is just a phase for you. Usually if you were Gay you would have these feelings to be with another woman ALL the time. It is quite commone for straight woman to get turned on by watching porn or seeing a pretty girl. Its also...

Lesbian Life: am i a lesbian, park bench, sexual preference
park bench, sexual preference, holding hands: Hey Sydney, wow 10 years old uh? That s a hard age. First off, don t be scared. We all had things like this happen around your age. I think you are just maturing and have alot to figure out. I think you should talk to your parents as best as you can. Do the...

Lesbian Life: living with my ex girlfriend, commited relationship, life span
commited relationship, life span, romantic life: Dear Living, Every once in a while I hear someone s story about continuing to live with an ex after the romantic life-span of the relationship, is over. I have to say, I have never heard one success story, so far, about this type of arrangement. Oftentimes,...

Lesbian Life: long distance relationship, lesbian, long distance relationship
lesbian, long distance relationship: Wow, that s a tough situation. Long distance is hard to do, and a lot can happen while you re apart. It can work, if you are both committed to dealing with the stresses that being apart brings. You might also put in a lot of effort and have it not work in...

Lesbian Life: I'm not sure if my wife is bi-curious/sexual, beautiful lesbians, soap opera
beautiful lesbians, soap opera, soap operas: Hello Eugene, It sounds like you have a general idea of what you need to do, which is talk to her, but you should approach it a different way. There is always a right and a wrong time to talk to someone about a particular subject, and a right way to approach...

Lesbian Life: Need advice, weird scenario, phone conversations
weird scenario, phone conversations, bad habit: Hello Astrid, I apologize for such the long delay to answer your question; I had an emergency to take care of. In relation to your question however, I will get right to the point. In truth, I think that if you can contact this girl, that you should....

Lesbian Life: New at this., lesbian females, pride events
lesbian females, pride events, feminine women: Hello Kelsey, Well many of us have been in this exact same position- trying to tell if a woman is bisexual/lesbian or straight. If you are attracted to feminine women in particular, you may find it difficult trying to pick your brain as to whether or not...

Lesbian Life: New relationship anxiety, coming out, nervous
coming out, nervous, lesbian: HI there and welcome to being an adolescent all over again. Except this time you re really feeling the chemistry so its gonna be even more intense. I don t know your age, but it doesn t really matter that much. What you re going through is perfectly normal,...

Lesbian Life: What to do next?, long periods of time, sexual tension
long periods of time, sexual tension, med school: Dear Next, She has spoken, when she said: she can t do this anymore.. I (you) haven t done anything wrong but she s not the type of friend I (you)need. Assume she has made up her mind. You have no choice but to take her word for it and respect her boundaries....

Lesbian Life: Really Confused..., going down on a girl, physical relationship
going down on a girl, physical relationship, kissing girls: Hello Riona, I apologize for the delay on your answer, and on others. I had an emergency to take care of. It definitely seems as though your mind and heart have put you in between a rock and a hard place. Part of you wants to just go for it, because...

Lesbian Life: Relationship, foster parents, first move
foster parents, first move, late august: Hello Diana, Well, it doesn t sound as though you are completely over this first girl. You say that you feel like you need a girlfriend. That being said, I might suggest first off that if you enter into a relationship with someone, that you take it somewhat...

Lesbian Life: Running out of time and completely confused, female friend, outlier
female friend, outlier, running out of time: Hi Meg, Maybe you can try to approach this differently. When it comes to wheter or not your gay or straight, you have to think about this being a life decision or a phase. Do you see your self in a long term relationship with a woman? Have you dated woman?...

Lesbian Life: space, long distance relationship, getting a job
long distance relationship, getting a job, plane ticket: Hello Joy, I m sorry to hear about your situation; I can t imagine how difficult it must be for you. It sounds as though along the way something made her hesitate. From the point where you were supposed to move closer to her, something scared her. Perhaps...

Lesbian Life: Wondering if a co-worker likes me more than just a friend., deep feelings, straight women
deep feelings, straight women, sad face: Hello Tracey, If your co-worker does not even know that you are a lesbian, she may not even be aware of her actions and how you may perceive them. Many straight women feel comfortable changing in front of their friends who are girls. Many women develop...

Lesbian Life: Is a woman a lesbian if she only has been with one woman?, arguement, heterosexual
arguement, heterosexual, both sexes: Hello Shantel, Perhaps she is bisexual as well. Perhaps she is bisexual, but is having difficulty admitting that she may be. For her to be in a relationship with you, I wouldn t necessarily be inclined to say that she is a woman that just had an experience...

Lesbian Life: How do I come out?, sexual orientation, 2 sisters
sexual orientation, 2 sisters, better sense: Hello Katie, Well the good thing here is that no matter what, you have confidence that for the most part your family will support you. The hardest part here is discovering yourself; finding out who you are as a person. That being said, it is not always...

Lesbian Life: What should I do?, teen, coming out
teen, coming out, lesbian: Thanks for your email. I understand your frustration and the intensity of the emotions you are feeling. It is great that you are getting comfortable with your attraction to women. Sexuality is a very fluid thing, and we can be attracted to different people...

Lesbian Life: Am I bi-sexual, straight or a lesbian, lesbian, bisexual
lesbian, bisexual, questioning: Thanks for your question. It sounds like you have a couple of things going on. The first one, your question about your sexual orientation has a simple answer. You don t need to know if you are a lesbian, bisexual, or any other label. You can have same sex...

Lesbian Life: Confused., sex with my girlfriend, proper tools
sex with my girlfriend, proper tools, counselor: Hello Izzy, Although I could offer some input on this issue, due to your situation, I feel as though I d be unable to provide you with what you are looking for. I feel as though you may want to talk to an expert counselor on this site as I feel as though...

Lesbian Life: Confused, women lesbians, sexuality
women lesbians, sexuality, pleasure: Hello Jay, Well I cannot speak for all lesbians here, but some lesbians may just get any pleasure at all out of being with a man. It may just feel somewhat less than satisfying, even if they were to get aroused. The reason being that they may not feel an...

Lesbian Life: confused.., head over heals, guy friend
head over heals, guy friend, fire place: Hi Amy, All I can tell you do is to be careful about how you go about this. Its going to be hard to do anything with her because she has a girlfriend. You also have to wonder why she is flirting with you if she has one. Regardless of the fact the gf is...

Lesbian Life: confused.., head over heals, guy friend
head over heals, guy friend, fire place: Thanks for your email, I understand what you are going through. I m glad you are aware of and acknowledging your attractions to women. Your situation is touchy for a few reasons. On the one hand I really encourage open communication, and talking to her directly...

Lesbian Life: confused.., head over heals, guy friend
head over heals, guy friend, fire place: Wow, there s alot of excitement going on here. I would say go for it, if she wasn t in a relationship. Above all respect is huge in any relationship. You have to respect her bond with her girlfriend even you find her unattractive, she deserves your respect...

Lesbian Life: confused.., head over heals, guy friend
head over heals, guy friend, fire place: Hi Amy, You want the truth? Do not pursue this woman. You think you re confused now? Going after her and making moves on her will only complicate the situation more. Why? SHE HAS A GIRLFRIEND! And bad relationship or not, you still have a boyfriend (or...

Lesbian Life: confused.., head over heals, guy friend
head over heals, guy friend, fire place: Dear Confused, What are you confused about? Why do you like this girl? Why such strong feelings for her? Is it because she is unavailable? Despite your endless opinions about her girlfriend, she seems to like her and she did pick her as a long-term partner....

Lesbian Life: I have a crush on a straight coworker, lesbian professional, pottery class
lesbian professional, pottery class, secret crush: Danielle, Let s look at the situation for what it is and not what you want it to be. This woman has told you more than once that she is not interested in women on more than a platonic level. But because you want her actions to mean more than they probably...

Lesbian Life: ex, hurt and pain, morals
hurt and pain, morals, purse: Dear Ex, You refer to this person as your ex and I find that interesting. Perhaps a part of you does realize that although you are in close physical proximity to one another (same house), emotionally, the relationship is already over. It is one thing...

Lesbian Life: My First Time Girlfriend, time girlfriend, cheap apartment
time girlfriend, cheap apartment, sex before marriage: Dear First, We know that, for Kay, sex is something dirty. You say, she isn’t extremely religious, nor is she from a strict family. Given the fact that the two of you seem to have a solid relationship and that you can talk openly and work things...

Lesbian Life: Follow up Question, share your feelings, heather
share your feelings, heather: Hi Heather, Well when you never done something before you HAVE to take it slow. When I say take it slow dont assume anything and dont share your feelings too quick. Take the time and get to know the person. Go out with the person and spend time with her...

Lesbian Life: want my lesbian ex lover back desparately, facebook, e mail address
Lesbian Life: want my lesbian ex lover back desparately, facebook, e mail address, spell caster

Lesbian Life: My first love, wonderful women, good combination
wonderful women, good combination, women in the world: Hi Synitra, I dont understand how she can love you but be in love with her ex. That is not a good combination and someone is bound to get hurt. It seems like your gf has difficulty with letting go and that could be confusing. Its often hard being a relationship...

Lesbian Life: my gfs mom, rest of our lives, hard time
rest of our lives, hard time, girlfriend: Well, I can remember 18. What a very hard time to been in, you think you are a adult but still have the feelings of a minor. It s going to be hard on your girlfriend for a while, she s still got that respect and acceptance mind set about her parents. She s...

Lesbian Life: HELP!!!, walk down memory lane, full time job
walk down memory lane, full time job, romantic night: Well, with every relationship you need to fuel the fires to make it survive. I would text her often about the way it is when you are together, get that longing going. I would then plan a nice romantic night in at yours or her place to recreate that spark you...

Lesbian Life: help, long term relationship, race creed
long term relationship, race creed, romantic relationship: Hello Amanda, This is perhaps more common than you know. When we think we know who we are and what we want, and then something comes around and that all changes, then we get scared and confused. You don t need to be that scared and confused here. If you...

Lesbian Life: help, bisexual, coming out
bisexual, coming out, friends: It is great that you are exploring your attractions and being open about them. It sounds like your best friend is not quite in the same place as you, if she has to be drunk to kiss you. I encourage you to stop asking what she wants, and ask what you want....

Lesbian Life: am I a Lesbian ??, sexual preference, shy person
sexual preference, shy person, different reasons: Krystal, you said like most young ladies I know. They seem to go back and forth for alot of different reasons like you. I say if you are more comfortable with women, date them for a while seriously and see if that helps your feelings towards the whole sexual...

Lesbian Life: Looking for an answer!, sexual orientation, nice girl
sexual orientation, nice girl, gay guy: Dear Looking, Keeping with the fact that we can only change ourselves or have influence over our actions and since you say that: The problem with me is....I play the hard to get girl and it s not something i like about myself, then I would start with...

Lesbian Life: Love triangle, love triangle, true feelings
love triangle, true feelings, self preservation: Dear Triangle, I wish I could tell you it is simple or that people do this every day. But the fact is, that walking away from someone we love, is not easy. It is, however, sometimes a matter of self-preservation. Yet most of us procrastinate way too long...

Lesbian Life: am i a lesbian?, questioning sexuality, lesbian
questioning sexuality, lesbian: I understand what you are going through. I assumed I was straight growing up because that is how we are raised. The answer is, you don t need to know if you are a lesbian. You can have same sex or other sex attractions without labeling yourself. This kind...

Lesbian Life: love, same sex relationship, same sex attraction
same sex relationship, same sex attraction, lgbtq community: It sounds like both you and your friend have a lot of questions in your minds. It also sounds like you aren t talking about them. If you want to know how she is feeling you need to ask her. Open communication is the best way to figure these things out. Having...

Lesbian Life: I'm not sure if my lesbian friend likes me or not!!, reoccurring dreams, great personality
reoccurring dreams, great personality, smiley faces: Hello B, Well it sounds like the real question here is how do YOU feel about her? You say at first that you are not even bi-sexual yet you mention that you find yourself thinking about her and you seem as though you want her to have feelings for you. I...

Lesbian Life: married and sexually attracted to women, sex with women, wonderful person
sex with women, wonderful person, making love: Hi, Im not sure I understand what you are saying. What are you searching for? Keep in mind that you in order for you to deal with this issue is for you to be comfortable with who you are. You said that you dont want to tell your two friends. That is not...

Lesbian Life: I NEED TO KNOW, mixed signals, closest friend
mixed signals, closest friend, deep breath: Okay, take a deep breath. Ya ll are friends and there are certain feelings people have for each other when they become attached in anyway in life. I think you need to talk to her about her feelings, if she s happy with her husband, and what is going on in...

Lesbian Life: Need Advice and Confussed, unhappy relationship, lesbain
unhappy relationship, lesbain, great friends: Hi, Everyone does things differently but I wouldn t advise that you ever admit to a instructor a crush that you possibly have because in the end they will most likely protect themselves by denying. This way there is no hard feelings. Its really hard...

Lesbian Life: Need help coming out., lesbian, christian
lesbian, christian, coming out: Erin, I completely understand your situation. When I came out to myself and my husband I thought I would never come out to my family. They live far enough away that I thought I could get away with that. But living a double life is too stressful. I heard...

Lesbian Life: running out of options, juvenile arthritis, shit luck
juvenile arthritis, shit luck, women who love women: Hey Leah, wow and you are just 20? That s a lifetime of stuff to have went through in two decades. Number 1, I am very gay always have been but have two awesome boys. I know the stereotype but look over other people s views and worry about the important stuff....

Lesbian Life: school, student counselor, moral beliefs
student counselor, moral beliefs, girls school: Hello Livia, This is a hard situation to be in especially at your age when high school can already be tough enough. Being comfortable with your sexuality in part also means that you are okay owning up to it. It may also mean that you acknowledge that some...

Lesbian Life: taxes, www irs gov, p504
www irs gov, p504, gov pub: Hi, This is really cute. I laughed when I read this because I have NEVER gotten this type of question. I was soooooooo about to press the sorry outside my expertise button but I really wanted to give this a shot. Off the back I don t have an answer...

Lesbian Life: want my lesbian ex lover back desparately, face lacerations, new girlfriend
face lacerations, new girlfriend, negligent driver: Hello needy, To be honest, it sounds as though your ex has moved on, or at least as though she wants to. I wouldn t suggest that you give her that Christmas gift, nor stop by her house. From what you ve said, it sounds as though she is ignoring you, and...

Lesbian Life: does she like me, church, gay
church, gay, lesbian: Thanks for your email. I know how hard that situation can be and I feel for you. On the one hand I believe that as gay people we need to be open and honest about who we are. That comes with consequences sometimes when other people are afraid to understand...

Lesbian Life: Why?, vintage store, sweet words
vintage store, sweet words, gay club: Hi Nath, When you say Ewww! do you mean yuck? Because that is how I interpret it. Either way your reactions came from you not feeling comfortable with the idea. You laughed probably because you didn t know what else to do and at the time that was probably...

Lesbian Life: just broke up with my first girlfriend and i want her back!!!, first girlfriend, grieving process
first girlfriend, grieving process, necessary knowledge: Dear Want her Back, Though it is natural to want to stop the pain of a breakup by convincing the other person to take us back, it is not possible to convince anyone to do anything against their will. And trying, only makes things worse. If your girlfriend...

Lesbian Life: I have a crush on my friend and she doesnt know, honduras central america, native beliefs
honduras central america, native beliefs, strange country: Dear Crush, A new-found crush can be so titillating. Yet if any of us knew what awaits us in its wake, sometimes, we would stay as far away from it as possible. Being in a strange country, where the culture and the language can be so different from...

Lesbian Life: how do I fix this?, sexual side effects, setting boundaries
sexual side effects, setting boundaries, honeymoon phase: Dear Fix, Backing off a little, sounds like an excellent idea. Communication is key, in any relationship. Clarity becomes even more crucial when there are changes taking place or when all is not well. There are a number of possible reasons why intimacy...

Lesbian Life: girlfriend and Marijuana, hippie culture, smoking marijuana
hippie culture, smoking marijuana, smoking pot: Dear Hurt and Lost, One therapist I know refuses to see patients who are active in their addictions. She says they cannot be held accountable for their behavior and it is unlikely that any progress can be made until the substance use (or process) of choice,...

Lesbian Life: Am I a lesbian or am I asexual?, self perception, partner selection
self perception, partner selection, desirable quality: Dear Am I, No one can answer for you the question of whether you are a lesbian or not. You must answer this for yourself. Being in a relationship (in and of itself) won t help you answer it. You will know, when you know, regardless. I think that what...

Lesbian Life: Just how much time heals all wounds?, time heals all wounds, woman 3
time heals all wounds, woman 3, truth of the matter: Dear Just How, Initiate a plan for no contact under any circumstances, immediately -period! Do whatever it takes. Change your phone number/e-mail. Do not contact her even if the sky is falling and make sure she knows there will be consequences for her...

Lesbian Life: Is it time to let go of my relationshp?, itimacy, backseat
itimacy, backseat, resentment: Dear Time to go, Question: Why are you leaving it up to her to make all the decisions? I ll pause here... and allow you a few seconds to answer the above question. OK, ready? Now armed with this new knowledge about yourself, you can hopefully see...

Lesbian Life: I told my straight friend I loved her, dedicated friend, romantic feelings
dedicated friend, romantic feelings, time and space: Dear Told, This is one of those instances where once the toothpaste is out of the container, there s no forcing it back in. What s done is done. You can and should, allow her the time and space she needs. Once she s had some time to digest it all,...

Lesbian Life: will she come back to me, ending relationship, tell tale signs
ending relationship, tell tale signs, back in my arms: Dear Will She, If I could see into the future, I might be able to let you know whether your girlfriend will be coming back to you or not. The only thing I have to go on though, are the countless breakups I hear about and some of the tell-tale signs...

Lesbian Life: Coming out, honour killing, hand on heart
honour killing, hand on heart, minded family: Occasionally, I read articles like Newsweek’s, ‘Gay Families Coming Out’ and I hear stories about the young, courageous masses who have fought and continue to fight and risk so much to be where we are, although there is yet so much to be done. Still, I can’t...

Lesbian Life: confused, honesty is the best policy, old adage
honesty is the best policy, old adage, media ads: Dear Bryant, To save a lot of time and energy, not to mention, trying to second guess, I always feel that the old adage of honesty is the best policy more than fits your question. Let her know that you are interested in her and would like to ask her out....

Lesbian Life: should i continue to save my heart for her, intimacy issues, open relationship
intimacy issues, open relationship, objective point: Hi J, Going on the information you haven given, there is confusion centered around whether you should continue to pursue this relationship. I do not believe any relationship can overcome serious issues when other people are involved however casual. If...

Lesbian Life: dating a mom & coming out to my mom, serious relationship, young mother
serious relationship, young mother, waiting period: Dear Dating, As I stated in my previous response: It is unfair to get involved with another person till you have allowed sufficient time and looked inside yourself for the answers. It is unfair to her and it is also inconsiderate of yourself.Your focus...

Lesbian Life: Falling For The Straight Friend, fear of rejection, open relationship
fear of rejection, open relationship, cyber friends: Dear Falling, In this age of disposable cyber-friends and blind dates, we tend to meet more people, more often and rejection is the order of the day. One would think practice makes perfect in all things, but being rejected (it turns out) isn t among...

Lesbian Life: In love with a straight woman, sitution, bestfriend
Lesbian Life: In love with a straight woman, sitution, bestfriend, affections

Lesbian Life: is she flirting?, colored beads, hemp necklace
colored beads, hemp necklace, serious relationship: Dear Ashley, I would say from what you have told me, this girl is flirting with you. She obviously knows or has figured out that you are a lesbian and is more than likely curious. There are two things you could do; either ignore the flirting and joking for...

Lesbian Life: friends not accepting new relationship, little snippets, biological families
little snippets, biological families, things take time: Dear Friends, Whenever the topic of limits involving friends comes up, I often share with people, that for those of us in the GBLT community, friends are the equivalent of family - the family we choose. We commonly find ourselves needing to replace the...

Lesbian Life: Help..i love this girl but shes too far away, long distance relationships, glbt orientation
long distance relationships, glbt orientation, relationship expectations: Dear Far Away, To your first remark - nobody turns you gay or bi or anything you are not and don t want to be. In fact, it is not even necessary to have a relationship or be with anyone who is of a GLBT orientation, in order to know that you are gay...

Lesbian Life: help with communication skills, school internship, clubbing scene
school internship, clubbing scene, lesbian life: Dear Cha, Of course you would be feeling a little lost after hearing those comments about you. But here s the thing; they don t know you. Unfortunately the lesbian life, though it can be liberating and empowering, some women find difficulty living the life....

Lesbian Life: In love with a straight woman, straight woman, daily basis
straight woman, daily basis, 33 years: Dear Kat, There is no way to say this but str8 out. Heterosexual women like to mix it up a bit with the lesbians. She is flirting with you, of course, you know that. It is flattering to her and also to you. I can understand the angst you are going through,...

Lesbian Life: I'm in love with my straight friend, megan fox, gay relationships
megan fox, gay relationships, gys: Dear In-Love, Progress - not perfection - is what its about. I realize you may be impatient and that your picture of how things should be going may look quite different from the way another person sees it. But if you read your previous letter to me, you...

Lesbian Life: What's next...., lesbian relationships, friends with benefits
lesbian relationships, friends with benefits, sidenote: Dear Keri, Looks like she is very interested in you. That s great. As you have spent a fair amount of time getting to know each other as friends it seems reasonable to me that you had just looked upon this relationship as just a friendship. Obviously, your...

Lesbian Life: Potential Date, litmus test, negative perception
litmus test, negative perception, sexual orientation: Dear PD, The only person who would know if she is a lesbian or not, is she, herself. So you have to take her word for it and step away. Unfortunately, there is no litmus test we can perform in order to be 100% certain of someone s orientation. In fact,...

Lesbian Life: how do I talk to a girl I when I'm shy, absence of fear, nelson mandela
absence of fear, nelson mandela, brave man: Dear Shy, Immature or not, is a matter of opinion. What defines immature is up to the person doing the defining. But, I ll say this: What seems immature to me, is all the name calling and game playing. Both of which it is not you doing. I wouldn t...

Lesbian Life: Break-up, getting over a relationship, constant contact
getting over a relationship, constant contact, ups and downs: Thats the thing. Its great to be able and talk and connect to see what went wrong but she isn t making the iniative. She has clearly moved on, which is why I suggested you do the same. Either way this is tough but again, she is already in a relationship and...

Lesbian Life: just confused...if its general feeling or special feeling that can turn to a deep realtionship...., arabian girl, realtionship
arabian girl, realtionship, deeps: Hi Cjay, Well, its possible to have a friend that cares about, only as a friends. However your friend took it further by saying you will never loose her. What she said implies that she has deeps feelings for you. If it was me, however one can take it as...

Lesbian Life: crush on a good friend, jane name, stupid arguments
jane name, stupid arguments, gut feeling: Hi Emily, There is book/guide to this. Im sorry that my answers doesnt really help but you have to keep in mind that there are a million possibilities and you didn t give much detail. You never told me your history or her history, therefore there was not...

Lesbian Life: Got crush on stranger!, long term relationship, 6 years
long term relationship, 6 years, stranger: Making friends with a stranger is kind of hard. It would be different if you knew where she shops or hangs out. You are going to have to find a common a ground or a way to get her attention. You can t just walk up to her and say hey can i be your friend ...

Lesbian Life: Dumped, mutual friend, having an affair
mutual friend, having an affair, grandkids: Hi Lizabeth, Sorry that you were dumped (as you wrote in subject area). That must hurt. My gf also cheated on me with a mutual friend and thats just the worse. Trust me its easier when you don t know the person. This is going to be difficult because it...

Lesbian Life: Out-of-date teacher crush, stable relationship, split personality
stable relationship, split personality, personal level: Hi, Don t beat your self up about this. It appears that you know what needs to take place in order for you to move on. Try to think about what it is that attracted you to her and for this long. Importantly, if you truly know that you are not gay, this should...

Lesbian Life: Out-of-date teacher crush, true emotions, good luck
Lesbian Life: Out-of-date teacher crush, true emotions, good luck, feelings

Lesbian Life: Lesbian in the military, uniform code of military justice, hail and farewell
Lesbian Life: Lesbian in the military, uniform code of military justice, hail and farewell, social graces

Lesbian Life: HOCD, obsessive compulsive disorder, fake boobs
obsessive compulsive disorder, fake boobs, masturbation methods: Being uncomfortable with oral can come from many different things. You probably just don t like it. There are someone women that don t like to give or receive oral. It could also be that you are not fully comfortable. You have to see how you are feeling when...

Lesbian Life: no idea, family mom, straight women
family mom, straight women, gay life: Dear No Idea, This woman must really be something. She’s got her mom, sister, kid; tiptoeing around her to try and “not make her mad” and engaging your help in doing so. She’s stringing along a boyfriend who she (at least at times) reports to have little...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian in the military, military lifestyle, rotc
military lifestyle, rotc, roommates: Hi Alicia, Congratulations on your decision to serve its military. While I don t always agree with its ways, I always respect those that want to protect and serve our country. Anyway, I know how you feel. I didn t come out until my freshman year in college....

Lesbian Life: Lesbien wife, sex with my wife, lesbian friends
sex with my wife, lesbian friends, hi john: Hi John, Dont consider your self a fool. There are alot of heterosexual woman that get around by lesbian sex. It doesn t make them gay/lesbian. SOmetimes its the idea/thought of being with the same sex that often get other women turned on. Well don t...

Lesbian Life: Should I leave, long long time, bruises
long long time, bruises, anatomy: Hi Esther, I am sorry that you and your girlfriend our having issues and abuse is never a good one. Sometimes love is not enough and no matter how much you love someone, it doesn t mean that you will have to put up her hitting you or the arguments. To answre...

Lesbian Life: in love and confused, long term relationship, nye party
long term relationship, nye party, work permit: Well at this point, all you can do is let it work itself out. Just hope that your working permit work out because there is not much you can do in different places. For now, I would just continue to be there for her and give her more time to open up. At the...

Lesbian Life: Being in love with my straight friend who happens to be my roommate, true connection, bdd
true connection, bdd, flings: Hi KE, I am not sure that I follow you. What is it that you hope to accomplish and why do you thnk she has BDD is this: body dysmorphic disorder?? Either way, she is not gay or atleast doesn t idenitify as being and it will be difficult for you to do anything,...

Lesbian Life: needing an answer, constanly, sex with a man
constanly, sex with a man, common ground: Hi Brittany, Thats hard because sleeping with men while being gay isn t in the play book. You are going to have to use your own judgement. The both of you slept with men in 2007, I don t think the dates really matter. If you are not psychic, all you can...

Lesbian Life: Online dating... Does the girl like me?, ill answer, moment of silence
ill answer, moment of silence, true identities: Dear Online, The first question I want to address is: “How often should I call her without coming off as too needy or desperate?” I’ll answer with another question: Are you needy and/or desperate? If you truly are, it is not up to another person to meet...

Lesbian Life: questioning, team mates, hair tie
team mates, hair tie, team mate: Dear Questioning, In my humble opinion, people spend entirely too much time and energy worrying about the what ifs and too little time doing what it takes to accomplish what needs to be done. So you’re a rookie? Everyone has to be a rookie sometime...

Lesbian Life: RE: Married in name only, kind man, transistion
kind man, transistion, great friends: Hi Laurie, So are you saying you are still with the same man for all these years? I understand what you mean by knowing you are a lesbian but not being able to be comfortable in your sexuality. Also with your kids being grown, it should make your transistion...

Lesbian Life: Relationships, text msgs, making love
text msgs, making love, married women: Hi Cindy, The first paragraph you wrote said alot. She is happily married for 8 years. That doesn t seem promising for you but at the same time she can t that happy if she is cheating with you. When you are dealing with someone that is already in a relationship...

Lesbian Life: how do I tell my deeply religious kids that I'm gay?, religion and homosexuality, losing sleep
religion and homosexuality, losing sleep, religious view: Dear Tell, The intersection between religion and homosexuality presents a dilemma that is becoming increasingly common. That is something to be thankful for I guess, since it means there are others in your same shoes to go to for support. Your kids...

Lesbian Life: i think i might be a lesbian, first orgasm, large breasts
first orgasm, large breasts, attractive girl: At this point, If you are feeling like you need to be with a female, I would suggest you try dating one. You won t really know until you try it. People masturbate for a variety of reasons and at this point, it probably isn t too important that you understand...

Lesbian Life: i think my wife is bi or even lesbian, maximgirls, erotic desires
maximgirls, erotic desires, big boobs: Dear George, Your wife just might be experimenting with sexual fantasy, this does not make one a lesbian. I would not like to speculate whether your wife is a lesbian or not. Maybe she is bi-sexual. It is not unusual for heterosexual women to have erotic...

Lesbian Life: i think my women is into a relationship with my friend girl, control freak, friend girl
control freak, friend girl, grammatical errors: Hi, Im sorry its really hard to read this because of the grammatical errors. If your girlfriend has been untrue in the pass it is likely that she is loyal now. I think that the best way to handle this is to communicate with her. This way you don t have to...

Lesbian Life: troubles in paradise, troubles in paradise, two females
troubles in paradise, two females, tho: Hi Cindy, I cant tell you how to get over her being married. That is something that you are going to have to work on, if you want to be with her. You just have to work on being natural. Nothing is going to feel right if you don t feel right about it...

Lesbian Life: Whether My Wife is Bisexual, female lovers, long tim
female lovers, long tim, lesbain: Hi well there is really no way to tell if someone is bisexual because we all have our ideas and its really about what you believe. I didn t know that she was driving to this woman s house. Thats not normal behavior for something that took place so long ago....

Lesbian Life: So what now...., lesbian relationships, friends with benefits
lesbian relationships, friends with benefits, sidenote: Hi, First you have to figure out why you are nervous. If you guys are friends and hanging out why be nervous? I can understand being nervous about your feelings but you are going to have to work on that. Now that she has told you how she felt, the nerviousness...

Lesbian Life: WHAT IS GOING ON, nice gifts, true friend
nice gifts, true friend, playing games: Hi Karen, Yeah that last sentence may be true but keep in mind that we are all different. I want to believe that she likes you BUT at this point, it wouldn t be fair for you to spill the beans and have to deal with the consequences. Just because you know...

Lesbian Life: to be or not to be, cute voice, man thing
cute voice, man thing, trust issues: Hi Stevie, It appearst that your gf has major TRUST issues and no matter how much you convince her, she will think the same. Unfortunately there is not much you can do. She is going to have to learn how to trust you. Why is she suspecting you of cheating?...

Lesbian Life: Confused, joanne fleisher, awesome dad
joanne fleisher, awesome dad, lesbian theme: Dear Confused, Having read previous responses, you seem to have become aware that no two cases are alike. Also, perhaps you have noticed that for married and divorced lesbians, I consider Joanne Fleisher s website an invaluable resource for support and...

Lesbian Life: coaching or therapy, abandonment issues, binding commitments
abandonment issues, binding commitments, holy unions: Dear C/T, It is just the most wonderful news, that you are seeking counseling! You have elected to embark on what will surely be the path of highest possibilities. Congratulations! Having said that, it also looks like your partner is doing her part....

Lesbian Life: confused, secret relationship, piece of the puzzle
secret relationship, piece of the puzzle, conventional life: Dear Confused, No need to put undue pressure on yourself. When the time is right, you ll know. You ll also eventually, know if she is the right person for you. I see you live in the UK, so I imagine the pressure is coming from your family, maybe to...

Lesbian Life: confused/stay or go?, commitment issues, love interest
commitment issues, love interest, unresolved issues: Dear Stay or Go, My question to you is: Do you love the person you are with? If not, why stay? You have to deal with what is going on now - first. Your current relationship is what is going on now. The other woman is the past. If you find that you cannot...

Lesbian Life: Desperate for help., terrible person, bad situation
terrible person, bad situation, bad person: Dear Desperate, You tell me the problem is, not about you labeling yourself. Labeling or not, it most certainly is about yourself. Just to be clear, cheating is anything that subtracts dedication, owed to an intimate partner, without their express...

Lesbian Life: My gf cheated!!, supportive family members, recovering from infidelity
supportive family members, recovering from infidelity, breech of trust: Dear GFC, Recovering from infidelity is painful and it takes time. What you cannot do is allow her off-the-hook, simply because she says nice things. You are behaving exactly as you should be, given the circumstances. Get some support for yourself,...

Lesbian Life: She Knew All Along, word female, true feelings
word female, true feelings, straight women: Dear She Knew, Of course she knows you like her, it is staring her right in the face with every action you take. You don t have to say the words to her, but an outright denial when confronted with the question, would be a game. I think it is a very...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian friend wants to keep me in the closet., lesbian relationships, lesbian friend
lesbian relationships, lesbian friend, community friends: Dear Closet Friend, It sounds like you’ve had a lot going on and all within the recent past. Showing care and respect for yourself, means taking the time to grieve, absorb and process each of these events, separately. As I have written before, for those...

Lesbian Life: My lesbian relationship, straight relationships, lesbian relationship
straight relationships, lesbian relationship, serious relationship: Dear MLR, Few people are capable of achieving relationship bliss by jumping into a new relationship, while still barely out of the previous one, emotionally. Especially, when the previous relationship has been traumatic. You must resolve the issues in...

Lesbian Life: Does my mother suspect I'm hiding something with my girlfriend?, worse case scenario, same sex relationship
worse case scenario, same sex relationship, niece and nephew: Dear Suspects, While you sit, wondering if your mother suspects; gather as much information as possible in the likely event that she may discover you are having a relationship with a woman. PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) offers valuable...

Lesbian Life: question to my initial question you answered to ... thank you btw, initial question, losing my mind
initial question, losing my mind, roommate: Hi Kim, This is not something that I can answer because there is not enough information here. Importantly, this is not something I don t think anyone can answer. Her BDD shouldn t have anything to do with her ability to like you. She already told you that...

Lesbian Life: My wife is probably gay, gay relationship, sexual relationships
gay relationship, sexual relationships, lesbian events: Dear Straight Spouse, You sound like a wonderful, loving, caring man. Any woman would be lucky to have you for a partner. Don’t sell yourself short! What you and your wife have had together, seems like a great friendship and there is no need to discard...

Lesbian Life: Is a woman at work interested in me?, woman at work, outgoing person
woman at work, outgoing person, first moment: Dear Woman at Work, I’m sure it’s just a matter of time before the two of you are talking up a storm. Jokingly, a colleague of mine likes to say: “When it comes to straight women, always let them make the first move.” I don’t think I subscribe to that...

Lesbian Life: co-worker problem, new feelings, sexual relationship
new feelings, sexual relationship, time thing: Dear CWP, Secret relationships are always problematic in many ways. Some people subscribe to the idea that if you have to keep it a secret, then you shouldn t be in it in the first place. I have heard the pain of many a partner who has waited for their...

Lesbian Life: confusion, different reasons, old women
different reasons, old women, doubts: Dear Confusion, She may be reacting to your own uncertainty. No one wants to get seriously involved with someone who may end up having doubts or not being sure of who they want to be with. Naturally, she would avoid the possibility of getting hurt. ...

Lesbian Life: just flirty or more?, romantic intentions, losing your mind
romantic intentions, losing your mind, massages: Dear Just, I get this type of question a lot. Signs to look for are: ~ Is she just as flirtatious with other people? ~ When you guys go somewhere together, just the two of you, does she dedicate special attention to her appearance in preparing? ~...

Lesbian Life: having a hard time getting over ex, life is a beautiful thing, addiction issues
life is a beautiful thing, addiction issues, scrambled words: Dear Getting Over, Life is a beautiful thing. Don t miss a single moment of it waiting or wondering if someone loves you or will come back to you. If she truly wanted to be with you, she would be. If she had no doubts, she would tell you plainly and simply....

Lesbian Life: Leaving Husband for Lesbian Lover, trustworthy friends, separation and divorce
trustworthy friends, separation and divorce, sexual experiences: Dear Leaving, The most important thing as you have so wisely gathered, is telling the children. The question of when and how of course is dependent upon the ages of each. Judging from similar cases I can tell you that, remaining open to whatever questions...

Lesbian Life: spanking, spanked, google
spanked, google, girlfriend: Hi Alex, Yes it is normal. Most people have certain things that turn them on, and spanking is definatley one of them. THe one thing to remember though, is to listen to your girlfriend. She will tell you how hard she wants it. Dont go walloping her, perhaps...

Lesbian Life: anal, bleeding gums, latex glove
bleeding gums, latex glove, index anal: Hi Marcy, thanks for coming back:) Well, its up to you both. I do strongly advise the use of an ANAL dam, which you can purchase from a sex shop or online, or you can make one from cutting up a latex glove:) In all honesty, it is up to you both. I am...

Lesbian Life: Confused..., casual conversations, one of the guys
casual conversations, one of the guys, out of the blue: Dear Confused, I have to say that I kept wanting to fill in whatever was missing from some parts of your letter. For instance, when you say she reacted as she did toward you, because you had gotten into a fight with a guy she had a crush on. I wondered...

Lesbian Life: my confused girlfriend, gut instinct, lesbian orgy
gut instinct, lesbian orgy, sexual experiences: Dear CG, This link might help: http://www.straightspouse.org/home.php. I know you are not married, nor can I assume you have any such plans, but the above link will give you some insight into the lives of people who once felt as you do. Some did not...

Lesbian Life: emotional affair, emotional, affair
emotional, affair, lesbian: Elizabeth, Obviously this has been going on for some time and the intensity seems to be increasing versus leveling out. By themselves not all of the things you describe would point to an emotional affair. Even a few of them together would cause concern...

Lesbian Life: My first same-sex relationship, same sex relationship, lesbian relationship
same sex relationship, lesbian relationship, meaningful relationship: Dear First, OK, I ll help you, but only on one condition -- that you try and seek on-going guidance from others in the LGBT community and especially, seek support from folks (in your area) who are new to the coming out process. So, is it a deal? ...

Lesbian Life: im confused, local college, boys and girls
local college, boys and girls, counsellor: Hi Ariel, thanks for coming to me. Well in all honesty, you could be bisexual. There is nothing wrong with this either. I think possibly, the best thing you could do is try and locate a support group for teens perhaps in your local area, or if this is...

Lesbian Life: Kowing if you're gay, negative experiences, question thanks
negative experiences, question thanks, different things: Hi Jessica, thanks for coming back. Different things work for different people;) If it makes you more comfortable telling someone that you trust first, then go for it! For a lot of people telling their direct family is pretty hard indeed. Just remember...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian or not?, cheating, bisexual
cheating, bisexual, relationships: Oh, Dear Jessica- We have quite a lot to talk about here. I think the best place to start is going to be with the concept of cheating and how you feel about that. I am assuming that you and your lady love were in a committed relationship. Cheating is...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian Flirting, doctors office, sexual woman
doctors office, sexual woman, legitimate reason: Dear Flirting, If she s asking for people s phone numbers and then deciding not to call, I m not one bit surprised that she doesn t have many friends as she put it. The next time you see her, let her know you expected her to call since she asked...

Lesbian Life: is she lesbian?, acceptable excuse, alcoholism treatment
acceptable excuse, alcoholism treatment, lesbian lover: Dear Is She, For anyone who s reading this, who has ever heard (or used) the excuse for an affair: I did it because I was drunk. Being drunk is NOT an acceptable excuse for having an affair. Having an affair because you are drunk, is however an...

Lesbian Life: Okay to swallow?, girl juice, wise idea
girl juice, wise idea, safe sex: Hi Linda, thanks for coming to me. Well to be honest, provided you dont have any sexually transmitted diseases or infections in your vagina, your partner should be fine. Its up to the individual really. If she chooses to do so, then thats ok:) Perfectly...

Lesbian Life: sex, girlfriend emily, woman sexuality
girlfriend emily, woman sexuality, womans body: Hi Maddie, Thanks for coming to me. The best thing i can do is send you to the following website: www.the-clitoris.com It is NOT a porn site. It is a site dedicated to all things woman. Sexuality, masturbation, all about a womans body. I think it...

Lesbian Life: stay or go.., guilt trips, lesbian relationship
guilt trips, lesbian relationship, man in my life: Dear Stay or Go, Before examining whether you stay or go or who you want to be in a relationship with for the rest of your life, I would suggest some time away from all possible relationships. You really seem to be on the right track when you state...

Lesbian Life: How to tell your family that you think you are a lesbain? What is it like to be a lesbian?, coming out, bisexual
coming out, bisexual, bi: Crystal, Telling your family that you are anything other than what they picture you to be is usually confusing. My suggestion to you is do some research first. There are hundreds of places on the internet that can help you with having “The Talk”. I have...

Lesbian Life: How can I tell if my wife is gay?, great testament, pink roses
great testament, pink roses, country men: Dear How, Lots of women talk for 400 minutes per month to their friends. It is how some women process things. Some talk about all their worries, the kids, work, gossip, relationships, and ask for advise. Ask yourself why she would rather talk to the...

Lesbian Life: I think my girlfriend is hiding something from me., trust your instincts, gut feeling
trust your instincts, gut feeling, kno: Dear Hiding, Trust your instincts! Your instincts are the best guide you have, when something suspicious is going on. Also, is your girlfriend also your doctor? If not, she has no right to tell you when to get on or off of your medication. I don...

Lesbian Life: Unsure, sweetest smile, eye contact
sweetest smile, eye contact, intention: Dear Unsure, Wait? For what? As I understand from your letter, it was not implied in any way that she would contact you. Two years is a long time of your life to waste on just flirting. Nothing wrong with it, if your life outside of that goes on in...

Lesbian Life: Age, many different things, age gap
many different things, age gap, relationship work: Hello Nisha, As much as we may not to say that it can be an issue, the age difference can bring with it many differences. It may not be the number so much that is the problem, but rather the differences in maturity, the differences in experience, and the...

Lesbian Life: my arabic root is killing me, arabic root, hiding in the closet
arabic root, hiding in the closet, bounderies: Dear DS, You have been through a lot. Coming from a part of the world where horrible harm can come to you simply for being who you are, you have been brave and strong and forged ahead thus far. I have no doubt that you are on the right path in meeting...

Lesbian Life: Confused, bad mood, wedding bands
bad mood, wedding bands, good friends: Dear Confused, Bickering is sometimes more common in lesbian relationships, because of how emotionally-charged connections between women can be and how inclined we are (as women) to dissect feelings in detail. So, the bickering between you? I d be concerned...

Lesbian Life: Confused, commitment issues, readiness levels
commitment issues, readiness levels, gaydar: Dear Confused, There are about as many different types of involvement between individuals as there are individuals. Not only is everyone s definition about what a relationship should be, different, but levels of readiness, levels of commitment issues,...

Lesbian Life: Confused!, bisexual, first relationship
bisexual, first relationship, friendship: Kelsi, I believe if you sit down and spend some time thinking about the questions you are asking, and are truly honest with yourself, you will find you already know the answers but I will give you my advice none the less. First off, it would seem that...

Lesbian Life: Crushes, bisexual, first relationship
bisexual, first relationship, friendship: Rosemary, Lots of women have crushes on other women, that doesn t make you bisexual, but it doesn t make you straight either. You need to decide if these crushes are really just intense reactions to friendship or if they are indeed romantic and sexual...

Lesbian Life: confidence, questioning sexuality
questioning sexuality: Hello Amanda, It is normal for anyone questioning their sexuality to go through a very strange and foreign period of confusion. Many people that grow up with the mentality that a heterosexual marriage coupled with kids is the norm, who in addition start...

Lesbian Life: My confused girlfriend, gay, bi
gay, bi, questioning: Willy, I want you to know that when sexuality comes into question there is no normal I can see why you are confused about your girlfriends sexuality, but my question to you is why does it matter? The types of questions that you should be asking yourself...

Lesbian Life: Delatrice, lesbian, toys
lesbian, toys, unsure: Lucy Lee, Not everyone has the same sexual turnons. Before you talk to her, make up your own mind about why this bothers you. Are you simply not use to sexual toys? Does the thought of using a food item for a toy disturb you or is it the actual item? Are...

Lesbian Life: I dnt know how to do it, coming out
coming out: Hello Jessica, Based on the way your parents reacted in the past, you can expect a similar reaction from them again. If you are planning on moving out when you are 18 in December, then I suggest you wait until then to say anything to your parents. I know...

Lesbian Life: I dont know what to do, male coworker, darker side
male coworker, darker side, fantasies: Dear Don’t Know, In his research, the Reverend Mel White has included basic explanations, comparing common interpretation and translations from the original Biblical text and how today s version might depart from the reality. I am including a link to Soulforce....

Lesbian Life: My ex girlfriend and I..., breaking up, control
breaking up, control, relationship: Shaunice, First off congratulations on your senior year. Secondly, letting someone control you is rarely a good idea. If she feels the need to impose rules that restrict who you can talk to, where you can go, who you can be friends with or what have you,...

Lesbian Life: Has my ex moved on yet?, new girlfriend, water under the bridge
new girlfriend, water under the bridge, facebook: Tara, It sounds like she still harbors some feelings for you, like the little kid who can t get the two they are use to playing with, she doesn t want you but she doesn t want anyone else to have you either. If you are both moving on then move on. Tell...

Lesbian Life: Confused!, low self esteem, intuitions
Lesbian Life: Confused!, low self esteem, intuitions, comfort zone

Lesbian Life: My ex girlfriend and I..., spell caster, marriage on the edge
Lesbian Life: My ex girlfriend and I..., spell caster, marriage on the edge

Lesbian Life: Is she into me?, position sort, exact position
Lesbian Life: Is she into me?, position sort, exact position, first move

Lesbian Life: Me and my friend., long term boyfriend, straight girl
long term boyfriend, straight girl, hour and a half: Hello Emma, I ve known several people to be in similar situations as you. However, in all honesty it has rarely ever worked out. It is a difficult situation to be in and to see clearly when you are viewing it from the inside. Unfortunately it seems as though...

Lesbian Life: ftm and partner, impartial person, ftm
impartial person, ftm, counsellor: Hi Ethan, thanks for coming to me. Firstly, its awesome that you have realised who you are, and are comfortable with it!! That cant have been easy and i hope all turns out well for you!! As for your girl. Well,the best thing you can do is make sure you...

Lesbian Life: My girlfriend, saying things, reassurance
saying things, reassurance, oct 31: Hello Shabahn, The truth is once someone gets cheated on in general, they tend to put walls up and have a tough time trusting others. Especially in her case because she is still with the person who has cheated on her in the past. A part of her may trust...

Lesbian Life: legality concern, work, lgbt
work, lgbt, firing: First off you raise a very interesting issue, and my research into your answer corrected some misconceptions I had on this particular subject. According to my research currently fewer than 20 states have laws protecting against sexual orientation or gender...

Lesbian Life: In love with a lesbian, home wrecker, cyber relationship
home wrecker, cyber relationship, international relationship: Dear In Love, Yes, absolutely, I see myriad red flags all over the place. Space restrictions may prevent me from listing them all, but here are just a few: *You are Married - This makes her a home-wrecker and you (unless you are in a open marriage)...

Lesbian Life: I'm in love with my ex best friend who I haven't seen for nearly two years., bisexual, first relationship
bisexual, first relationship, friendship: Laura, It seems that you have spent a great deal of time thinking about how you feel and coming to terms with your feelings and the actions of the past. That being said, you might want to consider that time can change our perception of things. It is possible...

Lesbian Life: mother daughter masterbating, incest, teenagers
incest, teenagers, masterbate: But they do help masturbate each other sometimes what does this mean to you? I once again want to say I am not a professional therapist and these are only my opinions, I am also limited by the information you give me in this format. To me this is a big...

Lesbian Life: Need some help and advice please i don't no what to do or think anymore?, questioning, gay
questioning, gay, bisexual: No one can decide your sexual orientation except you. You do not have to be a lesbian if you kissed a girl or even had sex with a girl. Sexuality cannot be categorized so easily. This is a very sensitive and personal issue and a lot of people (straight,...

Lesbian Life: i need help about a girl..., difficult relationships, magnetic appeal
difficult relationships, magnetic appeal, rescuer: Dear About, You do not say if this would be your first committed relationship. If it is, these things require a period of adjustment. So allow yourself time to get to know her better, instead of just being lured by that initial, magnetic appeal. She...

Lesbian Life: Problems while being intimate with my partner, sexual acts, older sister
sexual acts, older sister, first woman: Hi Kim, thanks for coming to me. The best advice I can give you is to go and talk to someone. I appreciate that you are not comfortable with talking to your doctor, but it may pay to ask your doctor if there is someone he or she can recommend that you...

Lesbian Life: She has a partner and I don’t know where to go from here…, long term relationship, meaningful conversations
long term relationship, meaningful conversations, dutch courage: Alex, If she has a partner and you don t want to end up being the other woman regardless if you truly are or not, then you need to walk away. It seems that your feelings have gone well beyond the safe realm of friendship and eventually it might lead to...

Lesbian Life: question about my coworker, coworker, cheating
coworker, cheating, married: Hollie, I would like to state a couple of facts before launching into my answer to this question: THIS WOMAN IS MARRIED. THIS WOMAN HAS CHILDREN. Take a moment to let that sink in. It is more than possible that your coworker is hitting on you and...

Lesbian Life: questioning myself!, obsessive compulsion disorder, beautiful creatures
obsessive compulsion disorder, beautiful creatures, gay person: I want start this by saying I am not a therapist and I have no formal training in any type of psychology… I am a person and the following are my opinions: HOCD is bullshit as in B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T. I believe in OCD and I think that that is a real thing....

Lesbian Life: she left me because she's questioning her sexuality, personal emotion, honest relationship
personal emotion, honest relationship, sht: James, I can understand that this is a hard thing to accept, that she would leave in order to find out what her true feelings are, but sometimes that has to happen for both people to move forward. I don t know if there were other reasons the two of you...

Lesbian Life: relationships, different life, immaturity
different life, immaturity, couple times: Rae, It sounds like she has decided that her new life is what she is going to work on moving forward with. Personally I feel you should allow her to do so, and move forward on your own. She is obviously happy with her current girlfriend and you don t seem...

Lesbian Life: Sexual Intercourse Problems, crying sex
crying sex: Kim, Please call a therapist. A drop in sexual activity is normal after the honeymoon stage in any relationship. I, however, believe that you have some larger issues at play-considering you past experiences. I believe that any therapist will be able...

Lesbian Life: STUCK, abusive relationship, married woman
abusive relationship, married woman, feelings of love: Hello Latoya, It s going to be hard, but you are going to have to be honest with yourself in this situation. To begin with, if your ex was abusive before, chances are she may at some point in time be abusive again whether it be physically or emotionally....

Lesbian Life: still questioning being gay, glbt community center, kinseyinstitute
glbt community center, kinseyinstitute, male friends: Dear Questioning, You definitely are in the questioning stage and this is a good place to be. It can however be terribly confusing and lonely, given the misconceptions of others. My suggestion for you is to find and associate with those who are where...

Lesbian Life: how do I stop loving her when she says she loves me?, lesbian, married
lesbian, married, leaving: Jenny, First off take take a break from all the other stuff and just concentrate on this for a few minutes. Find a quiet place (yes I know that is almost impossible with little ones running around) and think through what you wrote above. You have some...

Lesbian Life: troubled love, viable path, great women
viable path, great women, improving communication: Dear Troubled Love, I m sorry you are so sad. It sounds like your girlfriend is reacting to what she has perceived as criticism of herself as a person when you voice your concerns to her. The fact that you consider her a great women and still love...

Lesbian Life: Is she into me?, bisexual, work
bisexual, work, first relationship: Hi Lara, Thank you for the question. You should treat the possibility of a relationship with this woman the same way you would if it were a straight relationship. In other words don’t let the fact she is a female unduly shape your next steps. If you are...

Lesbian Life: does she like me, kicker, sweetie
kicker, sweetie, babe: Chelsea, Yes it is possible she likes you, especially since the two of you did have sex. As far as growing into something more, it could possibly yes, it might also be that she is looking for someone to spend time with right now and doesn t want a relationship....

Lesbian Life: not sure, converstion, survival kit
converstion, survival kit, fair share: Dear Not Sure, In life, as I see it, each one of us is given our fair share of puzzles to solve. The measure of each is determined in part, according to the preparation we each will need to acquire, as our own individual survival kit for our journey. Think...

Lesbian Life: how to ?., things take time, vicky
things take time, vicky, girlfriend: Hi Kimmy, thanks for coming to me. Well firstly, it is NOT your girlfriends place to tell anyone anything about you!! In fact if she is threatening to do that, then you need to ask yourself whether she is truly worth having as a girlfriend!! Someone that...

Lesbian Life: Accused of cheating., neighbor downstairs, emotional attraction
neighbor downstairs, emotional attraction, legitimate reasons: Dear Accused, Having had a dream about infidelity or having been told by a psychic, are not legitimate reasons to be convinced that someone is cheating on you. I can assure you that your girlfriend s insecurities about the solidity of your relationship,...

Lesbian Life: bi girl won't date girls?, date girls, straight girls
date girls, straight girls, friend nick: Hello Kim, Yes, I can see why you may be confused. I think the best thing to do in this situation is to talk to her about it. Get her honest opinion about it all. Perhaps she just finds girls attractive and would be open to doing something physical with...

Lesbian Life: very diff quest., expert volunteers, nice day
expert volunteers, nice day, thanks for your time: Hello Kim, I wish I could help you out here, but I have no information regarding other expert volunteers, sorry. I understand how you may want to speak with only one person due to the relationship and trust you built, there is nothing wrong with that. You...

Lesbian Life: Exes and more exes..., highs and lows, friend with benefits
highs and lows, friend with benefits, competitive sports: Hello Autumn, To answer your question directly- no, it is not normal. While it could be said that some same-sex couples, even some straight couples, mantain friendships with their exes, these individuals do not necessarily make all their exes a priority...

Lesbian Life: Fear of being gay back home., de facto relationship, gay relationship
de facto relationship, gay relationship, living in australia: Hi May, thanks for the question, and apologies for the lateness in reply. Im not so sure how to answer this to be honest! But I will give it a go!! Yes there is a lot of gay innuendo here, but for the most part, this country has come a long way in trying...

Lesbian Life: Feeling torn.... and dealing with a broken heart., dealing with a broken heart, beautiful little girls
dealing with a broken heart, beautiful little girls, truth and honesty: Hello Scarlett, Thank you for taking the time to bring up an issue that many people go through, but are afraid to talk about. It is undoubtedly a confusing and difficult situation to be in when you find yourself married to one person, but falling in love...

Lesbian Life: Torn between husband and an ex-girlfriend, exact same thing, piece of advice
Lesbian Life: Torn between husband and an ex-girlfriend, exact same thing, piece of advice, nuthin

Lesbian Life: my girl friend is married... to another woman, gay marriage, girl friend
gay marriage, girl friend, couple weeks: Hello Briana, Although it is by no means a justification of any kind, your girlfriend may have been scared to tell you initially that she was legally married because she was afraid it would scare you off. However, before you two decided to actually get...

Lesbian Life: Is she or isn't she interested?, friendship line, building a fence
friendship line, building a fence, new mom: Dear Is She, Sounds like your friend might be confused. She may be feeling attracted to you at times and extremely averse to the idea, at other times. If you are enjoying the rollercoaster ride she is taking you on and are drawn to the ‘chase’ then, by...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian friend and her mom, lesbian relationships, european girl
lesbian relationships, european girl, lesbian friend: Dear LFriend, What a shameful thing for a mother to do to her daughter! Unfortunately, you are now caught in the middle. Obviously, your girlfriend should know that her own mother, cannot be trusted. It would be so unfair for her to go on being deceived...

Lesbian Life: lesbians and masculinity, gay male couples, psychological elements
gay male couples, psychological elements, punk style: Hello Jeff, This is actually a very commonly asked question. While I cannot answer anything in terms of any biological/medical or psychological elements that may or may not play into this, as I am not a licensed professional in those areas, I can give my...

Lesbian Life: I might be.. so what do i do next?, dating girls, younger girls
dating girls, younger girls, lesbian friends: Hello Ann, First off don t worry, you don t sound desperate and the confusion you are going through right now isn t stupid, it s actually quite normal for someone in your situation. Nowaday, there are some many misconceptions about what it really means...

Lesbian Life: Please help me forget about my soul mate/Ex, family immigration, soul mate
family immigration, soul mate, sad moment: Hello Sara, Well it sounds like you two have had quite a lot of history. Anytime people have that much history with each other, they cannot easily be forgotten. You probably still feel a sense of emptiness because you two never had the chance at real closure,...

Lesbian Life: RE: Living together - First time relationship, lesbian experiences, time relationship
lesbian experiences, time relationship, argh: Dear Living, Thank you for thanking me for reading this, but the truth is, it is a real pleasure to read through something when the answers come so clearly. 1) Instant connection, does not a domestic partnership make. Just because you are chemically...

Lesbian Life: Just reeeallly close friends?, risk rejection, confusing signals
risk rejection, confusing signals, subtle signals: Dear Just, The first question that enters my mind is: Why is it up to her, to make the first move and all that is required of you is, to send subtle signals? I say, be courageous enough to make one GIANT bold move, since your crush for her is so HUGE....

Lesbian Life: Being rejected, crying all day, afraid of commitment
crying all day, afraid of commitment, great girl: Dear Being, Feelings (positive or negative) toward the people in our lives, are seldom constant. They are subject to change; they grow, wane and sometimes subside completely over time and often fluctuate between attraction and disinterest. What is important...

Lesbian Life: secret love with bff and now...it's gone, real good friends, crazy psycho
real good friends, crazy psycho, bff: Dear Secret, It is so difficult to feel torn between something we love and the need to do what is right for ourselves. It is a tricky road to navigate. What (or who) we are drawn to, is not always guaranteed to be the healthiest choice for our own good....

Lesbian Life: Torn between husband and an ex-girlfriend, time and space, new job
time and space, new job, 8 years: Hello Lindsay, Well I can tell you that you are not the first person to be in this position, so I don t want you to be down on yourself about how you feel. Feelings and emotions are uncontrollable; granted we can control what actions we may engage in based...

Lesbian Life: Is it wrong to not care?, middle age women, blah blah
middle age women, blah blah, blue moon: Hello Shaunice, I know it is hard to break away from someone you have been attached to for so long; in this case, however, it seems like the best thing to do. It sounds as though you re mind is more made up on what you want from her as far as a relationship,...

Lesbian Life: Should I let go?, lonely at times, curfew
lonely at times, curfew, temptation: Hello Jo, To be quite honest, your girlfriend is taking advantage of you. If even before you had gone overseas she was doing things behind you back and making comments such as what happens in a club, stays in a club, then she s not taking this relationship...

Lesbian Life: ?, confusing situation, myspace
confusing situation, myspace, girlfriend: Hello again Raquel, As I mentioned before, it appears as though she is just looking for attention. You brought up her girlfriend and she ignored it, as I thought she might. This may mean that she doesn t not want to confront the idea that she has a girlfriend...

Lesbian Life: What am I?, company of others, sexualities
company of others, sexualities, fantasizing: Dear What, You are not alone! Sexuality is not as one-sided, as some might assume it to be. You may well fall anywhere on a vast spectrum of possibilities. Someone sent the following link to me a while back and I find it relevant to share with you,...

Lesbian Life: how to come out, coming out, lesbian
coming out, lesbian, youth: There is no perfect way to come out to your parents. There is only expressing your feelings to them about your sexual life, which they do not want to hear. Just let her know you are having these feelings without going into the whole sexual part. I can tell...

Lesbian Life: Angry all the time, signs of affection, negative person
signs of affection, negative person, angry all the time: Dear All the Time, Some of us are rescuers. I include myself in this category. I once believed I could show another person the error of their ways, if I could just love them enough. Today, I am here to tell you, that you cannot rescue her. She has to...

Lesbian Life: baby on the way, baby on the way, first names
baby on the way, first names, mother in law: Hey Mama Nicci, I think you need to really talk to your partner about how involved you want to be in the children s lives. I have kids myself and i know what a big issue it is and I have always waited to involve my partner when she wanted to be. Have that...

Lesbian Life: bisexual or lesbian?, rough age, sexual identity
rough age, sexual identity, no doubt: Wow, 17 is a rough age. Number one, you are still searching for your sexual identity which is normal at 17. I would be worried if you were not. I had girlfriends in high school but seemed to still take guys to the prom just to not stir up the norm. That was...

Lesbian Life: Confused teammate, confused teammate, national anthem
confused teammate, national anthem, somet: Dear Teammate, Considering that, um, you re straight, why does it matter what her signals mean? If you are now questioning your sexuality, then that is more a signal about you and something only you can (and should)figure out by yourself. Perhaps it...

Lesbian Life: confussed, personal insecurity, 10 years
personal insecurity, 10 years: I think it is a personal insecurity that make our ladies feel like that. I would do everything to show her that those 10 years are the most important thing you do not want to mess up then introduce her to everyone before you start talking about them so she...

Lesbian Life: i don't know what to do, cheating, lesbian
cheating, lesbian: Congratulations on coming out, that s a big step. I understand how you feel liking someone who is with someone else but the truth of the situation is that she is not available. Even if she says she wouldn t have gotten involved with someone else, she IS involved...

Lesbian Life: I dont know how to meet a woman!, gain confidence, lesbian bars
gain confidence, lesbian bars, social interaction: Okay, I would look up on the Internet where the lesbian bars are. They are great for some social interaction but mostly just a meat market where you can get your feet wet. Actually if I were you I would look up local ladies on a dating site for lesbians. That...

Lesbian Life: no emotion, painful situations, thoughts and feelings
painful situations, thoughts and feelings, private settings: Wow, this one really hits home. I am your girlfriend, there are many women out there that feels this way. First off, by her family not being affection with her, she has issues with feelings of rejection. So naturally there is a wall between her and anyone...

Lesbian Life: no emotion, painful situations, thoughts and feelings
painful situations, thoughts and feelings, private settings: Dear Maggie, To be honest, there are so many possibilities for your girlfriends behavior. Her lack of emotion toward you could be, as she herself said, her personality and upbringing. As sad as this is, there s really nothing you can do about it. It is...

Lesbian Life: how to get my ex back!, family commitments, new lover
family commitments, new lover, mixed messages: Dear Liz, Honestly, the only way to get your ex back is to get this woman out of her life, which you cannot do. It seems like your not a priority to her, and only gives you attention when the other woman is out of her life. I don t think she is worth your...

Lesbian Life: ex lover, new friendship, exact ingredients
new friendship, exact ingredients, romantic relationships: Dear exL, In the community that surrounds me, I see ex-couples who are perfectly content now being friends. I find that it depends on the individuals and on what the original relationship was based upon and also (for some people) on the healing time between...

Lesbian Life: Fell in love with my best friend, who's apparently straight., classic cues, heartless bastards
classic cues, heartless bastards, gays and lesbians: Hey Jenny, religion is a barrier alright. But where there is love, there is hope. Talk to her about the feelings you all share. Ask her about living together and get that feedback. I hear alot of classic cues that she has feelings for you too but is letting...

Lesbian Life: Fell in love with my best friend, who's apparently straight., friend whos, couple time
Lesbian Life: Fell in love with my best friend, who's apparently straight., friend whos, couple time, straight girl

Lesbian Life: fantasies, realistic portrayal, guy porn
realistic portrayal, guy porn, gorgeous men: Personally I never fantasize about any men and i am a lesbian. I am solely attracted to women but I don t find lesbian porn exciting either. I enjoy movies about lesbians which seem to portray them correctly instead of as in the porn shows I have watched the...

Lesbian Life: this girl..., convo, bombshell
convo, bombshell, lips: Toni, I think you need to talk to this amazing girl, let her know what you want out of what feelings you have for her. I know she is in somewhat of a relationship with this other person but I believe she needs to hear that you care. It sounds like to me that...

Lesbian Life: Heartbroken, open communication lines, little ones
open communication lines, little ones, sacrifices: Let me see this is a hard one. I have kids with a partner so I know where you are coming from, that bond is so strong after the little ones come along. I would say talk to her and let her know you still feel the same and want to work on your relationship even...

Lesbian Life: Im Confused, self knowledge, sports team
self knowledge, sports team, self awareness: Dear ImConfused, I really think it s wonderful that at 15, you already have such clarity about your sexuality. The sense I m getting about the girl you like, is that perhaps she, is not as clear about her sexuality as you are about yours. It would...

Lesbian Life: Lesbians in trouble!!!, lesbian relationships, relationship issues
lesbian relationships, relationship issues, serious relationship: Hey Cassandras, communication is huge especially in lesbian relationships. I would try and sit down with your girlfriend everyday and start opening those lines again. As it processes start talking about the serious relationship issues you two are having. Love...

Lesbian Life: my lesbian partner of 4 years is still married, addiction problems, lesbian partner
addiction problems, lesbian partner, familly: Xtina, my suggest would be to talk to your partner about how you are feeling about the husband, the kids, and the addiction problems to alcohol you both seem to have. I know its hard to talk about feelings sometimes but you do not want them to stay in the...

Lesbian Life: no love, rocky time, seven months
rocky time, seven months, text messages: Dear Nicole, I think you are both extremely hurt, and out of love. It sounds like you have been hurt so many times by this woman, it s completely ridiculous. You ve been hurt so much, you ve subconsciously trained yourself to not feel any loving emotion...

Lesbian Life: i love her! what do i do?, wonderful person, second chance
wonderful person, second chance, anniversaries: Dear What to Do, Of all the studies on the subject of rejection, I recall one in particular about our most common reactions to it. In general, nobody reacts well to rejection. This is to be expected, that you will be hurting and that you will require time...

Lesbian Life: i'm so scared, sexualality, penis girls
sexualality, penis girls, wet girls: Dear Zara, I am deeply sorry for not responding to you sooner. My internet has been down for the past week. It sounds like you are sexually attracted to other girls, but what officially makes you a lesbian is if you could see yourself actually having a...

Lesbian Life: Older woman, emotional relationships, lesbian relationships
emotional relationships, lesbian relationships, prositute: Dear Kia, First you must decide if you want more with this woman, or just sex. It is clear that this lady just wants you for her own pleasure, and you obviously do not come first on her list of emotional relationships. If you feel that you are getting hurt...

Lesbian Life: My parents and ex girlfriend, sophomore year, none of my friends
sophomore year, none of my friends, 9 months: Wow, touchy subject. I had to think alot on this one. First and foremost remember yourself in this picture. I hear you talking about what everyone else wants but nothing about you. I think you need to sit down and think about if you want this ex back into...

Lesbian Life: planet hell-- please knock, juvenile arthritis, shit luck
juvenile arthritis, shit luck, networking groups: Hi, I am sorry that you are experiencing these changes at a young age. Hopefully the new year will bring better days. Im am sorry that you lost your girlfriend in a car accident and I can only imagine the pain. All you can do is slowly move on. Obviously...

Lesbian Life: sad and confused.., attractive girl, lesbian experience
attractive girl, lesbian experience, tie down: Hey Claire, coming out is a very hard thing to do at any age but at the same time its awesome. You finally get to be the person you want to be without holding back. I think you need to do some real soul searching and ask yourself is this the right time and...

Lesbian Life: Taxes, domestic partnership, karla
domestic partnership, karla, tax preparation: I am not a expert on taxes but I do not think you can claim anyone who is not a relative of yours as a dependent. I know that sucks but as of right now the government does not give us the same rights as others. Hopefully one day soon we all will be able to...

Lesbian Life: Woman are confusing, little white lie, wet t shirt
little white lie, wet t shirt, physical relationship: Dear Confusing, I like your last question, it s funny. Sometimes I wish I were psychic and could foresee the future, but alas I am just a mere advise columnist who must depend on the wisdom of deductive reasoning and statistical evidence. Although,...

Lesbian Life: Wondering If I am Lesbian, weird mom, knowledgeable sources
weird mom, knowledgeable sources, gay children: Dear Linda, I think the best thing for you would be to openly discuss ALL of your feelings with your daughter. Even though it may be awkward at first, it is the best thing for you to do in order to establish and discover the meanings behind your feelings....

Lesbian Life: too many white lies, million tears, million times
million tears, million times, lena: Dear TooMany, Have you ever had anyone pursue you by whom you did not want to be pursued? Left to her own devices, she may have come back to you, at least as a friend. But there is nothing that can kill any possibility of ever being in a person s life...

Lesbian Life: her, shy person, girl friend
shy person, girl friend, best of luck: Dear Tashia, All I can say is in order for her to even consider being your girlfriend you have to talk to her! Try and find a common interest and talk about that, just get to know her. By doing this, you ll eventually find out if she s gay or not. I hate...

Lesbian Life: What am I?, sexual dreams, open marriage
sexual dreams, open marriage, sexual encounter: Dear Amanda, Of course you can be bisexual or a lesbian without having any type of sexual experience. It all just depends on who you re attracted to. If you are attracted to women then most likely that means you could be bisexual or gay. Sexual experience...

Lesbian Life: Approaching Taken Lesbian, girl at school, good relationship
girl at school, good relationship, gf: hi mariela, thanks for coming to me.. well firstly, we can t help who we fall inlove with..can we?.. it all depends so therefore who your eyes lay on it might be difficult to remove it but it s all about growing and how to overcome those feelings and...

Lesbian Life: Asexual with homoromantic feelings, girl x, x girl
girl x, x girl, college friends: hello anonymous, well, for what i can say here, you too do have generally some things in common but to keep it short and simple you can t really judge if she s not into you if you have not heard it exactly from her yet. i do not mean to jump into conclusions...

Lesbian Life: Is she bicurious? Does she feel the same?, sexual fantasies, facebook
sexual fantasies, facebook, experince: Hi, I admit this is a very difficult situation to handle for you.... All that I would ask you is if you are really serious about her and intend to take it long with her for true..if yes then you will have to be really patient and persistent... Hope you...

Lesbian Life: Confused!, gorgeous hair, first move
gorgeous hair, first move, great friends: dear Lynn Stewart, apologies for my late response, well, as far as i can tell you, it s not for me to tell you when you should make you move. a lot of people ask that same question, it is frustrating YES!! but sometimes the other person give us signs...

Lesbian Life: Doesn't Understand, hurt and pain, good stuff
hurt and pain, good stuff, habit: Hello, I know exactly what you re saying. when exes do that its because they just want to know whats going on in your life and if you re seeing someone new. And yes to also torture. the fact that she knows that you still love her and by her keep calling you...

Lesbian Life: I dont know what to do, world matters, sticky situation
world matters, sticky situation, missing pieces: Hello,well this is a sticky situation because it s in the workplace and you being her boss can be tough. Because if things dont work out then you still have to face her daily on the job and it can create drama and confusion. They always say never deal with...

Lesbian Life: how can i get my ex back?, bad shape, soulmate
bad shape, soulmate, soulmates: Hi, Pls don t even try doing anything to get her back because she would again leave and everytime this happens it s you who would be in the complete bad shape - physically & mentally.. Please understand if your partner is thinking in the same way as...

Lesbian Life: Family and Friend..., kiss on the forehead, head over heels
kiss on the forehead, head over heels, close friends: greetings to you Stephanie, I m very thankful for you coming to me, well, well, i understand what you are saying here; that you want to maintain the constant relationship with that extraordinary friend of yours and that with informing her about your...

Lesbian Life: Love with best friend/boss, emotional relationship, traumatic situations
emotional relationship, traumatic situations, having children: hi Alice, thanks for coming to me. apologies for my oh so late reply. you are defiantly crazy about this woman, but you are not asking yourself the opposite question. is she crazy about me too? that is the question you should be indulging yourself...

Lesbian Life: I'll try my best, teacher student relationship, affection
teacher student relationship, affection, eva: thanks for coming again Eva, yes this might be hard, but don t forget that this situation can affect you a lot. and we don t want that...do we? so take it slow even if this is a teacher..we are all humans at the end of the day.. and keep me updated.....

Lesbian Life: Morally confused about my sexuality... Need advice, nice boobs, football players
nice boobs, football players, paramedic: Hello, well even though you re married, but you have to do what makes you happy. Because if you dont then you ll end up miserable. just like myself i was also married, got out of it because deep down i knew who i was and thats being a lesbian. and now iam...

Lesbian Life: I'm in love with my married best friend, rocky relationship, possessiveness
rocky relationship, possessiveness, beautiful boy: hey Sahara, it s nice to hear from you, so here is what i get with your dilemma, the general thing is that you are in love with your best friend who is married and has a son. The two of you all has hit it off when she and her husband broke up... but...

Lesbian Life: morally confused... Dont know who to turn to for advice, nice boobs, football players
nice boobs, football players, paramedic: Hi Jenn, Apologies for my late response, You are defiantly not doing something wrong, There is no place or section in the bible which states that homosexuality is wrong, people misinterpret the bible anyway they want to and say the wrong thing. Do not...

Lesbian Life: unsure, little mistake, relation ship
little mistake, relation ship, college experience: hi there, the first thing i can advise you to do is that, you should take things slow, but not as slow as just coming out of a friendship**even if you all are**. even if you all know each other a lot via friendship, but you all need to fully understand...

Lesbian Life: WIMAN DATING WOMAN, soul mates, soulmates
soul mates, soulmates, lesbians: hello, Wendy, yes lesbians do fight and have many arguments... it s women so do expect that. unless the two of you all are mature enough and learn to work out problems the right way. yes soul mates also do this. if a relationship is always stable, unfortunately...

Lesbian Life: No sure..., 40 year old women, afraid of commitment
40 year old women, afraid of commitment, word of honor: Dear Not Sure, To get at the core of the problem, I will change the question from: Why can t I stop falling for married women? to Why can t I stop falling for unavailable people? Arriving at an answer for this question, may take a lot of work. If...

Lesbian Life: CONFUSED, group of women, fetish
group of women, fetish, fantasy: Hello, well what i see is that you have a wild fantasy and you just want to fulfill it, but not be in a relationship with a woman. WEll you re young so go ahead and explore. have fun with it, and if you realize its not for you at least you can say hey its...

Lesbian Life: Why doesn't my girlfriend treat me as well as her ex-girlfriends, romantic relationships, family of origin
romantic relationships, family of origin, previous question: Dear Reader, Your Question: Should I walk away from the relationship or overlook this as a minor thing and try to be at peace with it? She short version of my answer is: Walk away right now. That is the only way that you can be, at peace with...

Lesbian Life: Does She Feel It Too?, foreign territory, wishful thinking
foreign territory, wishful thinking, eye contact: Hello, well start off with a simple smile when she looks your way, then you can say hi how are you today?thats just a friendly gesture. Once you get that out the way, you can simply say oh theres a good movie out coming this weekend do you want to check it...

Lesbian Life: Is This More Than Friendship?, gorgeous hair, great friends
gorgeous hair, great friends, eye contact: hi there again, apologies for my late response. i know this is not an excuse to my reply to you. i know that this is something which is mandatory but there was quite an incident which i had to urgently attend to which kind of made me delay a little...

Lesbian Life: hi i am really worried, sexual preferences, good friend
sexual preferences, good friend, conversations: Hi, I purely understand your feelings and love for her but the best thing to do would be to talk your heart out to her. It takes really a lot to change someone s sexual preferences and all the more the girl has admitted herself that she does not need a...

Lesbian Life: Love, desperate need, whole time
desperate need, whole time, little girl: Hello, the best thing to do since you re still in love with her is to give her 50 feet, meaning to leave her alone. because it hurts you more to see and talk to her. so as time goes on and you dont pick up on her phone calls, and dont see her the stronger...

Lesbian Life: lesbian relationship/abuse/dysfunctional/normal, fall semester classes, long distance relationship
fall semester classes, long distance relationship, relationship abuse: Hi Marie, thanks for coming to me, First of all, let me make things clear THIS IS NOT THE WAY A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP IS..AND FURTHER MORE THIS IS NOT LOVE. i try to be as real with my questionnaires as usual AND darling you deserve better. how can...

Lesbian Life: Moving out to Oregon from Colorado with girlfriend, freshmen year, gender relationships
freshmen year, gender relationships, clear signal: Hi, I believe this is the best chance to actually know if you are good enough for each other. Most of the time what happens in these kind of relationships is that everything would seem to be good and absolutely fine when meeting daily and going back to...

Lesbian Life: married and confused, intimate relationship, playing with fire
intimate relationship, playing with fire, married with children: Hello, well first off its not really a good idea to have intimate relationship with your boss. because this can affect your job and since you ve been there for 10yrs you dont want to lose your job in case one day she may be nasty to you and go behind your...

Lesbian Life: religious homophobic family and isolation, nasty messages, gay websites
nasty messages, gay websites, gay women: Hello, I know its really hard coming out to your family. Especially when the family is homophobic. Which I can totally relate and understand where you re coming from. I wouldnt worry about it now until you re in a serious relationship with a loving women....

Lesbian Life: Co-worker flirting, innocent questions, sex jokes
innocent questions, sex jokes, behavior changes: Hi, Sorry for the delayed response. As much as I can understand, I think she has no developed any such feelings still as you have.. Most of the times what happens is these kind of situations is that one falls in love and the other might not be necessarily...

Lesbian Life: Confused!, scary prospect, drunken night
scary prospect, drunken night, inhibitions: Dear Reader, You did the right thing! You needed to work-through-it by talking about it and you did. You did so, intelligently, by choosing someone you trust. And you told her, in a cautious/considerate manner, by not naming names and changing the timeline....

Lesbian Life: So confused, female sexuality, sexual attraction
female sexuality, sexual attraction, girl friends: Hi, Sorry for the delayed response.. It is good to explain in detail as it would be easier for me to know where you stand and what is bothering you, so no worries about the long mail.. As much as I can understand you have a strong attraction or say sexual...

Lesbian Life: I don't think my girlfriend fancies me anymore, lesbian relationship, good relationship
lesbian relationship, good relationship, lots of sex: Dear Reader, If I had to guess exactly what is happening here and was only allowed one right answer, I would say your girlfriend is someone who loves the chase. Once the prey (you, in this case or her ex, in another) has been caught, no need to make...

Lesbian Life: Does She Feel It Too?, friend zone, mixed signals
friend zone, mixed signals, baby steps: Hi, Sorry for not being clear enough! What I am trying to say here with those lines are ---- As I had mentioned earlier, start keeping little away form her in coversations, touch and other litle things when you meet. If she is missing your intimacy means...

Lesbian Life: not sure about how she feels, straight girl, facebook
straight girl, facebook, paying attention: Dear Reader, Awkwardness at work is one thing, but suppose a relationship develops -- one scenario to consider, would be, if it ends badly and you still have to face her every day. Or worse, what if it ends up affecting your job security, like if, the...

Lesbian Life: my first lesbian love, lesbian support groups, lesbian lifestyle
lesbian support groups, lesbian lifestyle, better person: Dear Reader, Greater exposure to the lesbian lifestyle. That is my recommendation, for you. As for her, she is not asking for advise, so we won t offer any. If she is ready to accept her feelings and to accept herself for who she is, then she will be that....

Lesbian Life: Just friends?, intense feelings, couples therapy
intense feelings, couples therapy, emotional affair: Dear Reader, It would be a mistake to assume that a brief, initial attraction like this to another person, would automatically make them a compatible partner for you. My answer is two-fold. One, remove yourself from the company of this other woman...

Lesbian Life: So I guess the secrets out...., bad kisser, family closeness
bad kisser, family closeness, straight girls: Dear Reader, The Secret is Out! Liberating huh? I view your dilemma as having a side A and side B and each side is at odds with the other. Side A: She makes you happy, you have found the love of your life and the list goes on. Side B: You cannot...

Lesbian Life: I hope you can help., hard to breath, outgoing person
hard to breath, outgoing person, little sister: Hi, You don t have to feel bitter or defeated because you are seeking advise to someone whom you don t even know....Long mail is good because I get to know your problem well.. so chill. I totally understand your feelings for her. I can confirm that you...

Lesbian Life: I am so in love and confused, intimate relationship, wonderful woman
intimate relationship, wonderful woman, eye contact: Dear Reader, I just read an article in the current issue of Psychology Today, which claims: Anytime there are two men or two women in the same room, there is sexual tension. That idea was previously foreign to me. But it does seem logical, given that...

Lesbian Life: please help me, hard drugs, watching tv
hard drugs, watching tv, landlord: Dear Reader, All families have secrets that are exclusively reserved for the priviledged few. Some families are airtight about their secrets. No matter how long you have been with her, you do not seem to be among those priviledged few. We tend to...

Lesbian Life: Who is she really attracted to?, physics course, human sexuality
physics course, human sexuality, delayed response: Hi, Sorry for the delayed response! Trust me this is really confusing... Well as she is dating someone in LA and that happens to be a HE.. Has she ever told about any of her girlfriends or experiences on that line.. If not then I feel she is not hitting...

Lesbian Life: Bad and very sudden breakup, emotional and mental abuse, violent woman
emotional and mental abuse, violent woman, abusive relationship: Dear Heartbroken, There is such a thing as a bad ‘first date’ or even a bad ‘second date’ But once we figure out we like the person enough to see them again, the first two months of a relationship are usually bliss, because that is when we find ourselves...

Lesbian Life: Confused and searching for the right way., lgbtq community, sex attractions
lgbtq community, sex attractions, physical attraction: Stephanie, thank you for your question. I really feel for you because I was in the same situation for years. If you have no physical attraction to the guy you are with, you should not betray yourself by having sex with him. Ending your relationship with him...

Lesbian Life: Confusing signs, confusing signs, dinner date
confusing signs, dinner date, gay club: I believe you need to step back from the situation and ask yourself how you can help a friend. If she dors want to help herself there s not too much you can do. Like you said she needs to grow up and realize she s worth being treated better. You can not help...

Lesbian Life: confused, labels, lesbian
labels, lesbian, bisexual: Thanks for your question, a lot of people get confused when they try to label themselves. My advice is don t worry about it. You can feel attraction to different genders in different situations and on different levels (ie sexual, emotional, etc). I know a...

Lesbian Life: Why do I feel this way?, being friends, doing the right thing
being friends, doing the right thing, do the right thing: Lorraine, this is a hard one but I d step back and remember the reasons you decided to call it off. There has to be reasons for the break up and realize she has moved on, so you need to as well. Being friends right now seems a little hard on you so I d distance...

Lesbian Life: Was she flirting with me?, girl crush, angelina jolie
girl crush, angelina jolie, straight girl: Your question was how can you tell if a girl is flirting or just being nice. The only real way to know is to ask her, which you should do if it is that important for you to know. Otherwise, I would ask you, why is it important to know? If you think someone...

Lesbian Life: frustrated with my dad, freak of nature, dyke
freak of nature, dyke, six hours: Ivy, First I will address the issue that you are hurting yourself. That alone is not good for you at all. It is obvious there is more that just being gay and coming out that is causing distress in your life, but that is not for me to get into here so for...

Lesbian Life: My girlfriend broke up with me even though she still loves me, space and time, best friends
space and time, best friends, girlfriend: Hi Hailey, A hard lesson to learn in life is that just because two people love each other doesn t mean they should be together. There are so many other factors to consider and sometimes those factors make being together harder than it needs to be. I...

Lesbian Life: help, pearls of wisdom, wonderful girl
pearls of wisdom, wonderful girl, back in my life: Dear Help, There is only one way to get a person back in your life and that is, for her to actually want to be in your life and for her to take the steps to make it happen. Letting go of your first relationship is always the hardest. Be gentle with yourself....

Lesbian Life: Am I a Lesbian?, questioning sexuality, lesbian
questioning sexuality, lesbian, sexual fluidity: The most important thing to realize here is that you don t need to know if you are a lesbian . You can have same sex or other sex attractions without labeling yourself. I grew up dating boys and was even married to a man, but I was attracted to women and...

Lesbian Life: Looking for Mate, colorado springs co, match maker
colorado springs co, match maker, 20s 30s: Hey Connie, this is a huge and expensive step. I d try every other avenue before paying someone to find love for you. I know you remember many times love is usually hiding right in front of you. I d be cautious to pay indidviduals without some sort of proven...

Lesbian Life: In love with my friend, questioning, lesbian mothers
questioning, lesbian mothers, bisexual: Thanks for your question, it sounds like you have a lot going on emotionally. I would like to point out a couple of things and then suggest that you find an LGBTQ friendly counselor or support group to talk further. The first thing is that sexuality, particularly...

Lesbian Life: i need help, freak out, bf
freak out, bf, best friend: Hi Leah, it sounds like you too need to have a serious talk. Put it all out on the table for her. Let her know what you expect and don t expect from her. She may have a kind of freak out period but I don t think you ll lose your BF out of this. She may just...

Lesbian Life: How to proceed?, physical relationship, curious guy
physical relationship, curious guy, rough and tumble: Hello Becky, I have no experience being bisexual but I can say I came out as a lesbain close to your age. You seem to have a good grasp on your sexuality and I think if you find this friend X has a attraction, pursue it. She will at worst continue to be...

Lesbian Life: straight girl problem, girl problem, straight girl
girl problem, straight girl, terese: Hey K, 1st of all, what makes you think she s in love with you? And what moves is she making? It sounds like you two need to stop playing around and start being real with each other. If you want to take it to the next level, you need to make it clear...

Lesbian Life: Unsure how to read date, girl of her dreams, romantic possibilities
girl of her dreams, romantic possibilities, everyday all day: Dear Unsure, You seem like a perfectly reasonable person. You are allowing things to blossom naturally, assuming there is any blossoming to be expected. It is always good to take your time, even when it seems like a sure thing. You seem to know this. ...

Lesbian Life: just some understanding, long term relationships, full custody
long term relationships, full custody, intimate relationship: Hi J, Clearly this is a frustrating situation for you and I totally understand why. But something you wrote stuck out to me: I am just so lost on how a person can throw everything that was good away because they rethought the gender part. That s the...

Lesbian Life: what should i do ?, lesbian, communication
lesbian, communication, first move: Nadya, Thanks for your question. My simple answer is that you need to ask her that. Any intimate relationship requires open communication. If she is asking for more time, talk to her about her concerns and fears. You also should share your needs and wants....

Lesbian Life: Is it over?, adult daughter, vague answers
adult daughter, vague answers, heated discussion: Dear Is It, When a significant other, has behaved in a certain way for a long time and then abruptly changes, it is easier to notice that something is awry. But if we’ve never been validated, are constantly discounted and not heard, we tend to see this...

Lesbian Life: 5 year relationship, personal independence, life matters
personal independence, life matters, whittling: Dear Reader, Part of how an abuser works his/her craft, is by whittling away at the victim s self-worth and sense of personal independence. There comes a point when a victim truly believes there is no other way to survive, except to remain with the abuser....

Lesbian Life: Advice?, intense feelings, closest friend
intense feelings, closest friend, half year: Toni, Not sure what you are really wanting to know other than accepting your friend. You need to establish boundaries with her since you are her friend and not expect anything more than that. How can you say you don t like the gay scene if you have never...

Lesbian Life: Coming out, good relationship, personal life
good relationship, personal life, mom: Debbie, My advice to you is to tell your mom first. Since you two have become so close she may already know. It may take them time to adjust to knowing this (if they don t already) but your parents will still love you. When you do come out to her make sure...

Lesbian Life: Coming Out, dianne rivers, self mutilation
dianne rivers, self mutilation, teen suicide: Dana, You are so very welcome. I hope everything works out for your neice and her mother. It is difficult enough being a teenager let alone one who has just come out to their family and being confused about it at the same time. I hope everything continues...

Lesbian Life: Confess or Not to Confess?, litmus test, friendship work
litmus test, friendship work, steadfastness: Dear Confess, You and your friend seem close. Telling her the truth about how you feel will be the real litmus test of the steadfastness of your relationship. Being rejected by her #should that turn out to be the case#, may seem devastating at first,...

Lesbian Life: Confused, conservative city, judgements
conservative city, judgements, dating sites: Hello Cole, wow let s see what we need to do here. I d totally check out some lesbian dating sites to get your feet wet. That way you will know who you are talking to and at least make friends if not girlfriends. You never know, you may meet the women of...

Lesbian Life: Confusion, lesbian girl, old girl
lesbian girl, old girl, sexuality: Josi, It is possible to be attracted to the person and what she is on the inside rather than the gender itself. Since this is the first girl you have been attracted to it is hard to say. Spend some alone time with her and see what it progresses to. You...

Lesbian Life: Confusion about relationship, pressure environment, straight girl
pressure environment, straight girl, friend of a friend: Ash, I would try to get more one on one time so you can get a clear vibe about what s going on between the two of you. Its a really hard situation to be in with a straight girl. Take her out for coffee or a drink for a no pressure environment. Hope this helps,...

Lesbian Life: confused, first lesbian experience, lesbian friend
first lesbian experience, lesbian friend, first woman: Jess, The only thing I can tell you is just give it time to let her see you are for real and that it isn t a phase you are going through. Eventually she will realize that your feelings are real. Don t pressure her, just let time do what it needs to. Hope...

Lesbian Life: Very VERY confused, please help me., man of my dreams, person man
man of my dreams, person man, guy friends: Dear Very, What you describe, is similar in a lot of ways, to the first stages of the questioning phase. Your feelings for another person, man or woman do not have to compare in any way, to what other people s preferences are. You get to make your own...

Lesbian Life: confused about my sexual orientation, sexual orientation, freak out
sexual orientation, freak out, 2 girls: Dear Confused, Usually, when we are attracted to one gender or another, it is not the entire population of that gender that we are attracted to, but one person in particular (and sometimes more than one at a time) of that gender. Many lifelong lesbians...

Lesbian Life: a crush or more, honesty is the best policy, dear jill
honesty is the best policy, dear jill, girl crush: Dear Jill, As of now what you have towards her is a mixed feeling. It could be the 4 years of life that, you are trying to fill up which you spent alone. Your bad experiences with men could also be a reason that you are comfortable with her. Give everything...

Lesbian Life: Having difficult time dealing with effects of first time lesbian relationship, intense desires, lesbian relationship
intense desires, lesbian relationship, second guess: Michelle, Don t live your life for how your parents feel you should live it. You know who you are and what you want. You found someone that makes you happy and that you want to be with so stay with her. If your parents disapprove of this situation don t...

Lesbian Life: what to do about my ex girlfriend?, chanc, bad weather
chanc, bad weather, out of the blue: Dear ExG, Thanks for the clarification. In this case, I’m going to pay the most attention to the event or series of events that took place around the time of the breakup. For example, you say: “We had also started talking about getting an apartment together,...

Lesbian Life: Feeling Comfortable being Intimate, physical attraction, emotional attachment
physical attraction, emotional attachment, head over heels: I hope you are ready you hear this, from my experience you are having issues for a reason. Its the emotional attachment you have. Sex is a whole lot more difficult when you are in love. Make a big deal out of it, candles and whatever. Making love is totally...

Lesbian Life: I Have hocd (homosexual obsessive compulsive disorder), hocd, sexual fantasy
Lesbian Life: I Have hocd (homosexual obsessive compulsive disorder), hocd, sexual fantasy, denial

Lesbian Life: My friend, last hope, freak
last hope, freak, girlfriend: Kathy, Love, like and horny within the same paragraph is a lot for a girl your age. Keep it simple with her and go to the movies or dinner or whatever you two like to do and see where it goes. You can tell her you like her more than friends and she how she...

Lesbian Life: Good Hearted Cheater, baby momma, graduation party
baby momma, graduation party, faithful one: Antoinette, Maybe you should just stay single for awhile to give your heart time to heal from all this crap people are putting your though. I feel for you for all this. I also think you need to stay away from this so called friend Natalia. She is either...

Lesbian Life: Hard relationship, loyal friend, hardest thing
loyal friend, hardest thing, 6 years: Dear H, Communication is key. Don t just look at what is on the surface. Ask for and be willing to hear, her true fears and insecurities. Be a loyal friend in whom she can confide the truth without fear of being judged. Many folks do find it difficult...

Lesbian Life: What just happened........, crazy people, 4 months
crazy people, 4 months, family and friends: Dear Just, No one but her could possibly know for certain, if she does some of the things she does, just to mess with your emotions. In fact even she, may not know why she does these things. If I had to guess, I would say that a part of her, probably...

Lesbian Life: I Have hocd (homosexual obsessive compulsive disorder), fetish fantasy, real boobs
fetish fantasy, real boobs, obsessive compulsive disorder: Rani, Ok, just to put your mind at a bit of ease, it is normal for a female to find the female body beautiful and not want to have sex with them. It doesn t mean you have to label yourself as a lesbian so relax. I truly believe it is all a fantasy dealing...

Lesbian Life: Jealousy/Trust Issues, ups and downs, trust issues
ups and downs, trust issues, delayed response: Hi Angela, Apologies for the delayed response. I understand that you love her a lot and have trouble moving on without her. If that was not the case there would have never been a comeback twice. My question to you is Will you be able to take it again if...

Lesbian Life: Does this mean she likes me,or it's just me???, applying lipstick, spoken person
applying lipstick, spoken person, frinds: Melanie, this is one instance where you need to be out spoken. Find Tess and just ask her whats up with you two. Sounds like you are looking at things that go on between you two very intensely, so now would be a good time to get things out in the open before...

Lesbian Life: Religous parents... Again., information thanks, choices
information thanks, choices, parents: Hayley, Ok, it seems pretty inevidable that not only will her parents find out but obviously they are going to send her away to school. It will be hard but you are both young and have no control over whatever happens. If it is meant to be for long term,...

Lesbian Life: Her religious parents.., honesty is the best policy, religious parents
honesty is the best policy, religious parents, many thanks: Hayley, honesty is the best policy. They will figure it out soon enough if you don t tell them and that will only make them more upset. You don t know how they will feel until you tell them. If they can accept you being that they are so religious, I would...

Lesbian Life: Still in love with my ex, disapproval, georgina
disapproval, georgina, 4 months: Zoe, I am sorry you are dealing with this as it has got to be hard on both of you. Since it is obvious you are on the losing end of this. She is chosing her parents over you and that most likely won t change anytime soon. Your best bet, as hard as this...

Lesbian Life: Not A True Friend, lesbian relationship, nice gifts
lesbian relationship, nice gifts, sexual contact: Hi, Great! I am really glad that you have control over your feelings and that s not something people easily have.. The very true and obvious answer is that she is not your true friend. You are a very strong and good person so you don t have to feel bad....

Lesbian Life: troubless, heart journal, bad company
heart journal, bad company, introspection: Dear Troubles, The reason why you continue to want to see her or to allow her to see you, has nothing to do with her. You apologize, when you’re not really sorry. You claim she “makes” you feel terrible. Nobody can make anyone feel anything, without your...

Lesbian Life: What to do....., bedroom apartment, 5 months
bedroom apartment, 5 months, five months: Tiffany, I have been in your shoes more than once so I def understand how difficult it can be living with an ex...especially an ex you still have feelings for. The best thing you can do is focus on yourself. Don t worry about her plans to get back with...

Lesbian Life: alone, nayomi, helpless child
nayomi, helpless child, coffee shops: Nayomi, you are so coming into yourself at fourteen, you above all others know yourself. Feeling alone at this age is normal, you need to find a place to hang out with people who are in a similar mind set. Coffee shops are awesome, so are bookstores help you...

Lesbian Life: Cheating Partner, mid life crisis, emotional dependence
mid life crisis, emotional dependence, romantic feelings: Hi Clara, The answer is that you are emotionally very much attached to her. Emotional dependence is the worst thing in any kind of relationship and it is really hard to get through because the one with it will never be able to let go the other nomatter...

Lesbian Life: Coming out to the children & ex husbands, school comments, stepdad
school comments, stepdad, friends at school: Cher, My advice to you is you just need to tell them if that is what you feel you need to do or it will eat at you. Your kids will soon realize it and will most likely be more upset if you keep lying to them. The longer you wait the more time they will...

Lesbian Life: Very Confussed need some advice, leap of faith, open ended question
leap of faith, open ended question, actual facts: Dear VC, The fact that she keeps her thoughts about relationships to her self, leads me to believe there is something there. Perhaps it is a sign of a difficult foundation with relationships (family of origin stuff). Or maybe, there is something very personal,...

Lesbian Life: what is my ex thinking?, single thing, insecurities
single thing, insecurities, girlfriend: Hi Amy. From what you ve described, it sounds like your ex may be at a different stage in her life and may not be ready to fully commit to you. If this is the case, I think it is important for you to decide whether you want to continue to have contact with...

Lesbian Life: Straight woman considering lesbian relationship, matters of the heart, racking my brain
Lesbian Life: Straight woman considering lesbian relationship, matters of the heart, racking my brain, childhood friend

Lesbian Life: hard to accept, fullfilling life, homosexuality
fullfilling life, homosexuality, whole life: Serena, So you would rather conform to being conditioned into being a heterosexual rather than live your own life for yoursel; to be happy? Not all of society is the same, not all in society think we should all live as heterosexuals. You need to find your...

Lesbian Life: help, lesbian relationship, 7 months
lesbian relationship, 7 months, coming home: Well Jill, If you have been in a relationship with her for 2 years and has given you no reason to believe she has cheated on you or no reason to doubt her than the feelings you have now you need to own. If she tells you there is nothing to worry about and...

Lesbian Life: help, im a little scared, lesbian mom, rock on baby
lesbian mom, rock on baby, positive outlook: Shayla, let s see I think I can answer this one. As a lesbain mom I have not had any issues with my children being not accepting or proud of their mom for being who she is and a whole lot better mom for it. They are very open minded to all ideas and still...

Lesbian Life: im confused, life doesn, nurture
life doesn, nurture, whole life: Hey Vernisha, I understand that you as a person have always craved for love and attachment and it is this nature of yours that you allowed someone to use you for her benefits. Life doesn t work like that if you keep giving at your cost you will always find...

Lesbian Life: interested?, virtual stranger, random conversation
virtual stranger, random conversation, desirable traits: Dear Interested, Don t let her actions dictate what you become involved in or not. Her behavior aside, ask yourself if what you really want, is a woman who flirts with everyone and if you are OK with dating someone who gets so drunk, that she has a completely...

Lesbian Life: is she interested, free time, little bit
free time, little bit, texts: Amber, I would love to help you with this but with what you ve given me I can t really offer the advice you want. From what little I know, it seems like you like her so why not explore it on your own. Go out with her more to eat or the movies and that will...

Lesbian Life: I'm More Femme Then Not And I'm Starting To See A Butch, butch, good luck
butch, good luck, amanda: Amanda, I would say approach it as you would any other type of situation. You can t help who you are attracted to. You are not at a disadvantage just because you have been with men, you will just appreciate women more because of it. Be yourself and don...

Lesbian Life: she needs time to think, many different things, pasts
many different things, pasts, retrospect: Sarah, wow okay, there are so many different things you could pick out of this that happened. I don t think she used you per say at all but I would give her the time she needs for retrospect. Do you know if it was her first time? Did she think you two moved...

Lesbian Life: please can you help me?, 15th birthday, kimmi
15th birthday, kimmi, nice boy: Kimmi, Hmmm, well a predicament you seem to be in. I personally don t think this girl should put that on you in order to have a relationship with her, what does your mom approving have to do with it? Your mom seems as though she isn t going to approve so...

Lesbian Life: Straight woman considering lesbian relationship, lesbian relationship, physical relationship
lesbian relationship, physical relationship, straight woman: Wanda, Regardless if you have fantasised about a physical relationship with a girl or not does not determine whether you are a lesbian or not. You don t have to label your self straight or lesbian...if you want to consider yourself straight then you can...

Lesbian Life: self acceptance., supportive parent, wonderful mother
supportive parent, wonderful mother, self acceptance: I also went through some of the same things you ve described and there was a period where I didn t accept myself, and to be honest, it was very tough. What helped me was to spend time alone and think about it. I thought about what it would be like, how I would...

Lesbian Life: sexual relationship, two different things, anal area
two different things, anal area, sexual relationship: marci, Butts and the anal area are two different things however it isn t about that it is about your comfort level. If the only thing that makes you say no is that hair around your anal area--tell her and she what she says, if it is the fact that you are...

Lesbian Life: undefined relationship, warm hug, eye contact
warm hug, eye contact, wink: Amber, seems to me that you and Taylor need to have a conversation about where this is going. In my mind I d say you two are right own track for the beginning of a relationship. If you need further explanation, talk to her and let her know your concerns. Just...

Lesbian Life: Wanting to approach a person....but...., chit chat, risk students
chit chat, risk students, pretty lady: Hi, She is living alone and is out of a relationship with children. It is quite obvious for women like that to feel comfortable with the same gender and sometimes they get pretty close with some whom they think share the same vibes. Just because she is...

Lesbian Life: Wanting to approach a person....but...., chit chat, risk students
chit chat, risk students, pretty lady: Dear Wanting, Wouldn’t most of us feel silly if it were suddenly discovered that all people are interested in both genders? The fact is that Kinsey’s scale of sexuality, does tell us that. Most of us fall somewhere on that spectrum and few folks fall at...

Lesbian Life: Is she Into me ? or What ?, easter holidays, serious relationship
easter holidays, serious relationship, housewarming party: Dear Is She, This girl seems like a really good candidate for a relationship. But when and with whom, is something for her to decide on her own. It sounds as though, she is struggling with the idea of her orientation and what that would mean for her....

Lesbian Life: 11 years with partner ~ No Respect, marital issues, harder time
marital issues, harder time, stepson: Christine, I think you really need to sit down and reacess your relationship with your partner. You two have been apart a long time now, I think you need to talk openly and honestly together about your future plans. Even in strong relationships, I believe...

Lesbian Life: COMPLICATED!, complicated question, serious relationship
complicated question, serious relationship, something left: Dear Complicated, First, realize that you have no control over your girlfriend s actions and no control over who she is at the core. If she is a person who cheats, a person who does not validate your feelings and a person who cannot even internally acknowledge...

Lesbian Life: Confused love issues, females, destiny
females, destiny, heart: Destiny, remember the first thing about advice isn t that its about you, its about what the person would do if it was them. There are many people out there that would say being straight is the popular option. But you need to find your own best option. ...

Lesbian Life: confused!, long term relationship, family and friends
long term relationship, family and friends, nanny: Claire, You seem more concerned about losing your job then in losing your girlfriend...you may need to think about this some more..You need to talk with your girl as it seems you are ready for it to be over. You need to search yourself for what you want...

Lesbian Life: confused!, wave lengths, dark thoughts
wave lengths, dark thoughts, pessimist: Alice, the most important thing for you to do is make sure you are happy. If you are not getting, and continuouly not getting what you need out of your relationship you need to figure out why. Maybe you should sit down and have a talk with her to see where...

Lesbian Life: So confused, rest of our lives, cliche
rest of our lives, cliche, couple of days: Hi, I have seen quite a few relationships of this kind where one of the partner is loyal and emotionally attached and the other always find a chance to leave. What I understand is that she will not stick with even if she comes back. Some people like to...

Lesbian Life: Is my coworker attracted to me? Or am I making a big deal of nothing?, bicurious, t text
bicurious, t text, texting: Hey Monica, First of all, your co worker does like you inspit of her marriage. At first it may seem to be a shock to you, but this situations do happen in real life. Yes, there are some individuals who are extremely kind, loving and caring,...

Lesbian Life: My girlfriend and I are ready to have a baby, califorina, sperm
Lesbian Life: My girlfriend and I are ready to have a baby, califorina, sperm, girlfriend

Lesbian Life: Girl, friends zone, good friend
friends zone, good friend: Marissa, Well there isn t much you can do if she only wants to be friends really, however just continue to spend time with her. You can subtly flirt with her and see how she responds. If she responds positively then it may change, if not then be happy to...

Lesbian Life: My girlfriend and I are ready to have a baby, artifical insemination, ready to have a baby
artifical insemination, ready to have a baby, lesbian couple: Amy, Not sure what to tell you here. I would keep looking if you two are serious about having a baby. You can always adopt if no one is willing to help. I wish I knew the right answer or someone to help, but I don t. I would just say keep looking around,...

Lesbian Life: girls, type of girl, good person
type of girl, good person, bf: Hi Again, First, congratulations on coming to a great conclusion. Figuring out that you play a part in most of what happens to you, is an all-important realization. Without this realization, all subsequent steps toward a better life are impossible. You...

Lesbian Life: Is she into girls?, chill friends, gay flag
chill friends, gay flag, girl at school: Dear Is She, I do not believe in labels. What you describe sounds more to me like, someone who is intent in standing firmly on one side, disinterested in what lies beneath the surface and denying all deeper aspects of herself. It is rare that any of...

Lesbian Life: Helping my daughters come to terms with having a lesbian Mum, mid life crisis, gay parents
mid life crisis, gay parents, mum and dad: B, the first one that comes to mind is Ellen s book called Love, Ellen. You can go on Amazon.com for reference books (http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_11?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=gay+parents&sprefix=gay+parents) or any LGBT site will have...

Lesbian Life: help, good mood, intimacy
good mood, intimacy, alot: Andrea, it sounds like to me that you two need to sit down and talk about where this is headed. As a couple or two individuals pursuing a relationship, you need to talk about your intentions in it. There must be a middle ground reached for it to be benefiting...

Lesbian Life: Im Confused, bestfriend, lilly
bestfriend, lilly, fantasies: Hey Lilly, From what you are saying you are bi-curious, and it may seem a little weird at first, but do what makes you happy. i think that you should try being in a relationship with a girl because from what you are saying you are defiantly curious...

Lesbian Life: Being a lesbian woman., separation and divorce, lesbian relationship
separation and divorce, lesbian relationship, single parenting: Angela, wow this is tough on you both. If you love this woman I think she s worth waiting for. Its hard to deal with a lesbian relationship on any level. I truly believe love is worth putting yourself out of your comfort zone to show her that you will be...

Lesbian Life: lost and confused?, long distance relationship, dream of life
long distance relationship, dream of life, insecurities: Hi, This happens always in relationships where one is totally attracted to only same gender and the other is a bisexual. They have choice and are more open to new relationships and the one who is attracted to the same gender falls a prey to the loneliness...

Lesbian Life: Sexuality, catholic faith, small pond
catholic faith, small pond, two summers: Wow, this will take a lot os soul searching on your part. Is this girl really worth all the negative feelings you are receiving? I don t know what your feeling but if you think she is worth it, try and spent time with her to deal with her hangups about being...

Lesbian Life: Spark, reminisce, subtle changes
reminisce, subtle changes, ful: It sounds like you have already taken that first step toward forgiving your partner and moving forward. Is she also willing to do the same and stay committed to you? If so, it will not be an easy road ahead for you and her. It takes a while to build back up...

Lesbian Life: Spark, tangible proof, genuine commitment
tangible proof, genuine commitment, relati: Dear Spark, You have forgiven her and you have decided to stick around. I d say you ve done your part. The rest is up to her. Here s what you should expect to see from her: * Genuine commitment to change, without wavering. * Consistent, tangible...

Lesbian Life: sleeping, relationship counselor, physical closeness
relationship counselor, physical closeness, reasurance: Dear Sleeping, Thank you for your follow-up. It is helpful for me to hear what helps and what doesn t. As for her unwillingness to accompany you to therapy, couples often encounter this problem, when it comes to attending therapy together. I find that...

Lesbian Life: To stay or leave???, apologising, good friends
apologising, good friends, 6 years: Jade, first and foremost, a child should never bear the responsibility of if you stay or go. You got into this knowing your partner was a mother. She seems to be handling things as best she can in this difficult situation. I think you two need to talk about...

Lesbian Life: I wonder if she likes me too., taking your time, infront
taking your time, infront, holding hands: First, let me apologize for taking so long to get back with you. It s hard to tell from what you ve described if she likes you too. The only way to know for sure is to ask her. I am not encouraging or discouraging you to ask her, but if it means that much...

Lesbian Life: The works!, girlfried, m 41
girlfried, m 41, whole time: Jo, I can see why you don t want to go back to men.. My advice to you is to take things slow, invite her out and make sure she knows there s no strings attached. Seems like she backed away because of her grieving feelings for her ex and your feelings surfacing....

Lesbian Life: Is this it?, woman of my dreams, brilliant person
woman of my dreams, brilliant person, available women: Dear Is, One brilliant person I know says, “when (seemingly unrelated) topics come up in the same conversation, chances are, they are not so unrelated.” Your letter made me think of this. All of that stuff about your recent discovery that you like women...

Lesbian Life: age difference - would it be an issue?, woman of my dreams, happiest girl
woman of my dreams, happiest girl, minded person: Dear Age Diff, If I were you, I would not make that big of a deal about trying to prove to her that you are mature. After all, this could backfire and give exactly the opposite impression. Who are you trying to convince that you are mature? Has she given...

Lesbian Life: When/If I should break up, wonderful person, husband and wife
wonderful person, husband and wife, excuse: Hey Emily, It s ok to be feeling the way you are feeling right now. i totally understand that whole thing about being gay especially when you are trying to find your inner self. whether it is to be a bi sexual, a lesbian or a pan sexual. I really...

Lesbian Life: broken hearted, relationship communication, magical words
relationship communication, magical words, magic words: Cyndi, I don t have any magical words for you about this because you must take this into reality. Your girlfriend seems to be exploring her sexuality in some different way and feels like you are disaproving. What she needs now is support and understanding....

Lesbian Life: butch wanting to have a baby, motherly instincts, father of my children
motherly instincts, father of my children, responsbility: Jamie, that s great! Being a parent is a huge responsbility and it means you can t give the child back when your done. I consider myself butch as well but would not trade anything for my sons. They made me the woman I am today. I didn t know love, patience,...

Lesbian Life: Coming out, coming out to parents, gay parents
coming out to parents, gay parents, independent events: Dear ComingOut, Make sure you are well prepared, before you make the big announcement. Arm yourself with as much reading material as possible for parents of gay kids, to offer your mother in place of the words you may be at a loss for. PFLAG is a good...

Lesbian Life: is she in the closet, unlucky one, barma
unlucky one, barma, facebook: Hi Liz, Firstly, i don t think that the barmaid at the club has ever been with a girl, and from what you did say happened between the two of you all, i am having a feeling that she is bi curious and she is into you a bit but she doesn t really no...

Lesbian Life: confused###, desires, girlfriend
desires, girlfriend, feelings: hello confused### Personally i don t think you should be in a relationship where you don t like or care about the person ..i think it is wrong to hide your feelings away from someone this is rude and unacceptable.. have you considered counseling or the...

Lesbian Life: confused about who i am., emotional changes, sexual orientation
emotional changes, sexual orientation, fantasies: hey, thanks for the follow up, It sounds to me that your parents wouldn t be thrilled at first with your news. Therefore I suggest you slowly get into the conversation and tell them about yourself. you should take baby steps...

Lesbian Life: Im still in love with my ex girlfried, spell caster, ritualist
Lesbian Life: Im still in love with my ex girlfried, spell caster, ritualist, hello everyone

Lesbian Life: Habitual Cheating, fear of commitment, personal awareness
fear of commitment, personal awareness, trust issues: Dear Cheating, Thanks for the follow-up. I think the one, most crucial thing to always keep reminding yourself of and what the psychologist is trying to get across is, that her process is not about you. While some rape victims do not seem to carry the...

Lesbian Life: for help, life in the balance, straight girl
life in the balance, straight girl, somedays: Hello, first crushes are so hard because its so intense. My view in this is nothing worth putting your life in the balance. If she is not interested like she says, move on. There are many other girls out there who are ready for situations like this. Find someone...

Lesbian Life: Im still in love with my ex girlfried, present moment, firstly
present moment, firstly, ex girlfriend: Hey Jamie, I understand totally what you are saying, and everyone has to go through that situation once they were in love. Now, i don t want to seem harsh but you are in lust. What i think you should do, is to take some time off from her, but before...

Lesbian Life: Am i a lesbian?, coming to the stage, fancy men
coming to the stage, fancy men, kindest thing: Dear Reader, No one can tell you if you re a lesbian or not. The answer lies, not outside of yourself, but within. Sometimes it takes a really long time to figure it out, but you must ask all those difficult questions of yourself. You re right when...

Lesbian Life: A little confused.., two daughters, nap
two daughters, nap, firstly: Hello Joi, Well, from what you said to me in the passage you seem to have everything under control, what you re missing is confidence. Firstly, since you said age is not a problem for you, that s an issue you let out the way. Secondly,...

Lesbian Life: A moment with a straight girl, raw nerve, freak out
raw nerve, freak out, straight girl: Lori,this is a sticky situation. You need to try and talk to your friend and tell her exactly what you wrote. I know as lesbians we are more comfortable with ourselves and other girls but some girls do what your friend did. Either she liked it and didn t want...

Lesbian Life: Question, homosexual community, those girls
homosexual community, those girls, sexual orientation: Hi There, I think that what you describe sounds extremely common. You say: I look very straight. According to who? When I attend events where one might find large numbers of folks who identify as LGBT, I usually find a full range of looks there. By...

Lesbian Life: Question about my daughter if she is gay, female friends, place thanks
female friends, place thanks, safe sex: Hey Kate, First of all I can see that as a mother, you are very concerned about your daughter, but she is old enough to make her choices whether or not she wants to be with girls or guys. I believe that she is bi-curious and this can lead...

Lesbian Life: Question about daughter, move furniture, female friends
move furniture, female friends, place thanks: Dear Concerned Parent, What your daughter is doing, is perfectly natural. Experimentation, is a necessary part of self-awareness. To obtain more information which I am sure will be very helpful to you, visit: www.pflag.org and plan to attend some of...

Lesbian Life: Does She Really Love me?, taking my time, love interest
taking my time, love interest, cousins: Hello, its awesome that you are so in tune with yourself that your sexuality is already such a part of you. My advice would be to allow your love interest to get to that point as well. She seems to not be there yet and that s the reason she s so undecided...

Lesbian Life: so sad, catching feelings, time cause
catching feelings, time cause, belongings: Cristina, wow, this is really messed up situation. My advice to you is to gather up some paper or pencil or your laptop and write all your feelings down. Your girlfriend seems to have issues with this relationship when her family becomes involved. The whole...

Lesbian Life: Talking to a Child, time children, good chance
time children, good chance, right time: Hi, I would surely say no this is not the right time because this is the time children tend to see, know, learn what relationships are.. Right now she understands what she sees and this form of relationship is not widely accepted though there is nothing...

Lesbian Life: thanks for help.....I need some advices once again, student counselor, class mates
student counselor, class mates, sexual attraction: Hello Pat, Thanks again for righting back to me, i will be available any time you need my help. firstly, it s rare that a lesbian change fully into a heterosexual relation. That person may become a bi sexual but not straight, because that person...

Lesbian Life: My wife may be in the closet about being gay., argumentive, adult toy
argumentive, adult toy, toy party: Dear Reader, Don’t wait around for her to get counseling. If she is not ready, that is OK. Ultimately, you can only take responsibility for your own actions and have a say in what happens to you. So grab the bull by the horns and make an appointment to...

Lesbian Life: coming out, sexual preferences, home study
sexual preferences, home study, cousins: Hi Serena, What are you scared of???? Sexual preferences does not make anyone bad. You should accept yourself the way you are and that would give you strength to talk about yourself to your family. There is nothing wrong in being a lesbian and if you feel...

Lesbian Life: coming out, christian values, home study
christian values, home study, cousins: Hello, I know it may be hard coming out to your family. Especially if they have christian values,but if they really love you, they will not judge you. They will accept you for who you are and give you the love and support that you need. I would sit down and...

Lesbian Life: So confused.., big boss, personal problems
big boss, personal problems, bf: Hello,It seems she doesnt know what she wants. One minute shes giving you the cold shoulder then the next minute she wants to be your friend and be close again. I would sit her down and have a talk with her. If not I would recommend you move on and find someone...

Lesbian Life: My daughter came out.., raging hormones, dangerous behavior
raging hormones, dangerous behavior, breaking the rules: Hi Donna, 1st of all, I think it s very commendable that you and your husband are being so open-minded and understanding. Keep it up. There s not enough of that in this world. As for your daughter, I think you re dealing with a few different issues....

Lesbian Life: First Real Lesbian Relationship Need Help, eggs in one basket, lesbian relationship
eggs in one basket, lesbian relationship, trust issue: Dear Real, Particularly because you have both been through a lot and because, you both have trust issues, I would say, take it slowly. I can imagine what feelings of comfort she must bring you. But, to you especially and because of your background,...

Lesbian Life: Heartbroken, serious relationship, initiates
serious relationship, initiates, true love: Hi, Well I don t see any reason as to why you should not call her... The major issue in true love and any serious relationship is Expectations.. You expected her to think the same way you did on the anniversary and when that didn t happen it spoiled the...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian wife ?, suspisions, cute women
suspisions, cute women, lesbian porn: Hello,well if she has desires for other women then she may actually want to try it. It s good to communicate more with her and see how she really feels. If she s not happy in the marriage then she should leave the marriage. By her saying that she should of...

Lesbian Life: married and questioning, question the answer, gay women
question the answer, gay women, sexual partner: Dear Reader, On occasion, I have tackled the proverbial: How do you eat an elephant, question. The answer inevitably follows: One bite at a time, of course. So, the next question becomes: Which ‘bite” do you eat first? When it comes to married...

Lesbian Life: Need Advice, gay churches, planetsappho
gay churches, planetsappho, mate1: Hello, yes in the Lesbian life its so hard to find someone. As being a lesbian myself I do can understand where you re coming from. The girl that you have a crush on have you tried to hang out with her?like ask her to hang out with you to a movie, or brunch...

Lesbian Life: nipples,backside, long nips, girl friend
long nips, girl friend, backside: Hello, well you should take it as a compliment that shes that attracted to you and wants you daily. There is nothing wrong with it. Enjoy it as much as possible.If she wants to do it before showering I guess she enjoys the way you taste. have fun with it....

Lesbian Life: Saving a relationship after the long distance, long distance relationship, saving a relationship
long distance relationship, saving a relationship, emotional affair: Dear Saving, Is there anything I can do to to improve myself? This is the most important question of all. In addition, I will ask: Why are you settling for someone who is so completely unavailable? If she says she does not want you to distance yourself...

Lesbian Life: Some Advice?, friend of a friend, better person
friend of a friend, better person, rest of the day: Dear Reader, There is simply no way to tell what she‘s thinking. Even if you know for a fact that she has the deepest of romantic feelings for you, she may not know this about herself. If you approach her, she may recoil in fear or out of self-loathing...

Lesbian Life: advice, issue at hand, football game
issue at hand, football game, engagment: Hello, first of all congrats on the engagment. It seems that shes not really handling living with your son too well. Which Iam sure she knew all of this prior to proposing and prior to moving in as well. This is something that should have been discussed from...

Lesbian Life: age gap with a twist, old ghosts, shock to my system
old ghosts, shock to my system, age gap: Hello, well what I say to this is that despite the age gap communication is the best thing. Let her know how you feel. And she should be more understanding to your feelings and concerns. If she really loves you then you have nothing to worry about, especially...

Lesbian Life: attracted to a lesbian co-worker, wonderful woman, married woman
wonderful woman, married woman, true self: Lea, Thank you for giving me the opportunity to help you. Have you spoken with your husband about your feelings towards this woman or any other past attempts with women? If you have, then that is great! Communication is always of the utmost importance...

Lesbian Life: backside, browneye, embarasing
browneye, embarasing, laughing matter: Hello,how are you?well when someone cares about you theres no need to laugh, because this is something that you can t help. Now when you say that your backside is large do you mean your butt?or are you talking about your vagina? But to answer your question...

Lesbian Life: just beginning to think i'm bi-curious, delaney, cuddle
delaney, cuddle, hallways: Delaney, Actually, I wouldn t worry too much about labeling yourself. If you find yourself attracted to other girls, then I say go for what you want and leave the labeling to other people and just enjoy yourself. It sounds like you are looking for that...

Lesbian Life: how do I break up?, male friends, cofee
male friends, cofee, wonderful person: Hello, oh that is really serious if shes threatening to end her life over you. There are some issues that she needs to sort out. Have you tried getting her some help either a therapist or a doctor? Let her know that you really care about her but in order...

Lesbian Life: crossing the line..., stick in the mud, sexual woman
stick in the mud, sexual woman, women friends: Hello, even though it seems that she may have some attraction for you as well. And she hasnt left her husband yet and says that its good between she may be a bit confused and want the both of you. She enjoys spending time with you as well and also wants to...

Lesbian Life: curious, car ride home, crazy dreams
car ride home, crazy dreams, pretty face: Dear Curious, Straight girls do flirt with other girls. Sometimes this is not conscious. In her case, everything seems to indicate she s got deep feelings for you and yet she s counting on being able to overcome all her feelings for you the minute...

Lesbian Life: Don't Know what to do..., lunch tray, waiting in line
lunch tray, waiting in line, longest time: Hello, well the best way to ask your friend on how she feels without stepping over the line and losing your friendship is asking her how she feels about homosexuals?Then you can ask her if shes ever done that before?and how she would feel if someone she knew...

Lesbian Life: How do I fall out of love?, great girl, first love
great girl, first love, single day: Hello, as with any break up it all takes time. I know it s hard because I have gone through the same thing. And especially when theres a song that comes on it makes you think of that person. The best thing to do is to keep yourself as busy as possible. Join...

Lesbian Life: Gay girl straight girl crush, affectional orientation, conventional definitions
affectional orientation, conventional definitions, girl crush: Dear Reader, As it happens, you are writing to somebody who doesn t believe in labels. In my view, everyone s affectional orientation is somewhere on the continuum. But, very few people fall at either extreme end. This means, that you would have to...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian life, lesbian life, underwear
lesbian life, underwear, girlfriend: Hello,I think there s not a really appropriate time to be intimate. i would just go with the flow and you guys do it according to when you feel the time is right. When you both feel its comfortable and you re both relaxed. As far as the sharing of underwear,...

Lesbian Life: How To Meet, lesbian bar, mate 1
lesbian bar, mate 1, cofee: Hello,well the best thing to do is go on a website, such as myspace or even mate 1. or if you dont want to spend the money on a dating website, try www.craiglist.com in your area. Place an ad stating that you re bicurious and would love to meet a woman for...

Lesbian Life: I'm confused!, contrary to popular belief, self exploration
contrary to popular belief, self exploration, strong word: Dear Confused, So you have passed for heterosexual up until this point. Lots of folks do on the way to self-exploration. There is more than one stop on the spectrum of sexuality and sometimes, it changes. Hate is a strong word. What we interpret...

Lesbian Life: I'm so confused!, sexual desires, best of luck
sexual desires, best of luck, christy: Christy, Sexual desires and having actual feelings towards someone doesn t always go hand in hand. It could be that you view her in that light because you have heard that she is so promiscuous and your fantasies have taken over a bit. I wouldn t take...

Lesbian Life: I'm in a lesbian relationship, but I'm very unsure about my sexuality., lesbian relationship, having a great time
lesbian relationship, having a great time, sexual person: Dear Unsure, In general, I do not believe in labels. They are useful to some extent and for the purpose of description and language, but they never tell the whole story. Basically, labels serve to box what cannot and should not, be boxed. We are far more...

Lesbian Life: How do I make a move on my boss?, epic proportions, curious girl
epic proportions, curious girl, fellow employee: Hello,well first of all its always a No-No to have some type of intimacy relationship with someone you work with. Because suppose you guys do hit it off and have a great time and make love, and then it goes sour. Can you imagine having to face her after you...

Lesbian Life: Please help me, girl at school, blushes
girl at school, blushes, smiles: Hello,well it seems that she feels the same way you do.However since shes graduating soon she probably just wants to focus on school right now. is there a way where you guys can go to the same school once you graduate as well?perhaps still keep in contact...

Lesbian Life: Should I proceed??, long distance relationship, mutual attraction
long distance relationship, mutual attraction, common interests: Hello, well in my opinion I would go with your gut feeling. If you really want to pursue her I recommend that you do. Especially it seems that you really like her and want to get to know her much better. Just take things slow and one day at a time, it will...

Lesbian Life: Should I proceed??, long distance relationship, dating website
long distance relationship, dating website, mutual attraction: Dear Reader, I often caution women about becoming too deeply involved in a long-distance or on-line relationship before you actually meet the person. There is so much to know about a person that can only be known from regular, face-to-face interaction....

Lesbian Life: Should I proceed??, long distance relationship, mutual attraction
long distance relationship, mutual attraction, common interests: Hi there! Patience is lot required in this relationship from what you have explained above. Well for anyone who has been molested be it during childhood or now it is definitely not easy to live life normal. The thoughts keep torturing them and it takes...

Lesbian Life: Should I proceed??, long distance relationship, mutual attraction
long distance relationship, mutual attraction, common interests: Keri, If you do care for her and want to pursue a relationship, then I say go for it. It may be difficult at times while she is trying to go through her emotions, but you being there for her might also help her to deal with and work through all she is...

Lesbian Life: Questioning...., game of truth, oppourtunity
game of truth, oppourtunity, cant trust: M, I could understand how you would be hesitant given your past and things you have been through. But.. in all honesty, I would say go where your heart leads you. I wouldn t necessarily focus on labels of being lesbian, straight, bi or what have you....

Lesbian Life: my relationship, specifics, girlfriend
specifics, girlfriend, desires: Tinyee, Have you spoken with your girlfriend about this? I would suggest doing so, if you have not yet already. Sitting down with her and being open and honest about your feelings, needs and desires is a great way for you both to be able to express...

Lesbian Life: Struggle with sexuality and posibility of being BI, lesbian relationship, multiple personalities
lesbian relationship, multiple personalities, sexual relationships: Kris, What an exciting time in your life this is right now! It s always wonderful when someone actually opens their eyes to their true sexuality and are willing to find out what the future has in store for them. Although it s exciting, it can also be...

Lesbian Life: how can i tell her my feelings; open up bout my sexuality with my friends and family., ohk, basketball team
ohk, basketball team, sher: Hello,the best way to break the news is to have a talk with them, first invite them to lunch and break it easily. Say that this lifestyle is something that makes you very happy and that you re comfortable with it. If they really love you, they will support...

Lesbian Life: I am wondering if the girl that i argued with likes me?, retart, facebook
retart, facebook, funnie: Ann, You may not like what I have to say, but this is how I see it. I am not trying to be mean to you, but trying to open your eyes to the situation as I see it... An outside opinion. Even though you may not have had intentions to do so, it seems to...

Lesbian Life: What should I do!?, christy, lunch
christy, lunch: Hello,well sounds a bit confusing since you dont really like her, and she feels the same way, yet you want to have sex with her. Well maybe try patching things up and become friends again. Invite her out to lunch or something, have a conversation. Then let...

Lesbian Life: any additional advice helpful and needed., memory lapses, manic episode
memory lapses, manic episode, quetion: Hello, and sorry for the late reply. Well iam so sorry to hear that your gf has bipolar., Its very hard to deal with someone who has it. However it takes alot of patience. So if you love her just hang in there and communicate with her as much as possible....

Lesbian Life: Best friend
Hello,well it seems that she does like you but not 100% sure if she likes you in that kind of way. Just continue showing her how you feel. Like when its her bday take her to her favorite place. suprise her with cards. and also invite her out to dinner. If...

Lesbian Life: confuesed between my love affair and religion
Hello, well in my opinion, life is too short. So with that being said you deserver to be happy and you need to do what makes you happy. If being with your husband doesnt satisfy you and truly makes you happy, you should be honest with him and let him know...

Lesbian Life: So confused, head games, being friends
head games, being friends, girlfriend: Hello, yes it seems that shes a bit confused. Seems that your ex doesnt know what she wants and wants to have her cake and eat it too. Even though she broke it off with you but still keep you in the loop by texting and calling you. I would just make it clear...

Lesbian Life: I Don't Think I Enjoy Sex, chemical imbalance, opinon
chemical imbalance, opinon, magnifying glass: Dear Reader, Sex is not usually the most important thing in a relationship, until you re not having any and then... then it becomes, Everything. The magnifying glass in your relationship should not be on the sex itself, but on what lies beneath this...

Lesbian Life: The ex factor, emotional dependence, boy friends
emotional dependence, boy friends, one people: Hi, I beleive you should let go off her.. If she really loves you and still thinks about you, the way you do - she does not have to come back when something is going wrong in her life. People make mistakes and ex s come back when dumped by their boy friends...

Lesbian Life: girls, possiable, strong feeling
possiable, strong feeling, circumstance: hello Katie, sorry for the late response, well firstly, i cannot tell you how to overcome your feelings for someone if you haven t told yourself or even tried to peruse this action. i understand this is a hard process but eventually it will fade....

Lesbian Life: god!!!, gender relationships, rape victims
gender relationships, rape victims, opposite genders: Hi Ryan, It s nothing but preferences my friend. All are not born with the same likes or dislikes on earth.. Each individual has their own comfort zones.. As faf as I can understnad from your question you feel the same gender relationships are stupid but...

Lesbian Life: Love or obesession?
Hello, well in my opinion I think its Love & Obsession. As you can see your ex has moved on to someone else. And the sad part is that you still lover her. And I know loving someone and letting them go is really hard, but within time you will heal and become...

Lesbian Life: In Love with a 'Straight' Girl, sexual tension, straight girl
sexual tension, straight girl, sexual experience: Leslie, It seems to me that she is bisexual, but not fully in the way that you d want. Most likely, she is just intrigued by it for the sexual aspect but not relationship wise. If you are looking for more, then I would look elsewhere for the time. It...

Lesbian Life: what label ? if any, broad spectrum, three ways
broad spectrum, three ways, boyfriends: Dear How, Here is a great website for you to visit - linger: http://members3.boardhost.com/Ask_Joanne You can never know what to label yourself, based on what someone else tells you. Furthermore, if you have read my column at all, you will know that...

Lesbian Life: When will I ever learn?, straight women, bad luck
straight women, bad luck, love: Hi there, I know how it feels and how complicated it is.. There is no fault of your s on this and you don t have to feel bad... It is nothing but a bad timing or a bad luck that everytime the women you fall for turns out to be a straight and it kills you...

Lesbian Life: lesbian life, freshman year, breast cancer
freshman year, breast cancer, lesbian life: hi Cecilia, i can see that love is defiantly in the air. you too both feel a very strong tension between the two of you all. and it all seem strange to you because you all were best friends and now all of a sudden you are together ...an it all seems so...

Lesbian Life: when is money an topic, head over heels, jerk
head over heels, jerk, suggestion: Hello, No you are not for letting this bother you. Any relationship should be 50/50 its okay once in awhile to pick up the tab for your lover, however the next time she should say oh baby dont worry I will get it for you. Because the more you do it, the more...

Lesbian Life: Rekindling the fire, happy relationship, spontaneous sex
happy relationship, spontaneous sex, great compliments: hello Agnes, i can see that you are hurting very much. but the point of the matter is that you all are having so much fun, chatting ect...and NO SEX AS U SAID. there is something wrong.. she flirts , on text messages. there is a huge problem there. for...

Lesbian Life: Relationship advice, long term relationships, lesbian relationship
long term relationships, lesbian relationship, bisexual girl: hey lana, thanks for coming to me. firstly all i have to say is that if you are not getting any satisfaction or you are not happy in the relationship you are in with this particular guy, THEN there is no reason to stay with him when you know that you...

Lesbian Life: relationship breakup, relationship breakup, lesbian relationship
relationship breakup, lesbian relationship, miserable situation: I would advise just moving on with your life and find happiness somewhere else. Get involved with things in your community or start taking a class to keep your mind and you busy. I know breakups are hard, but it does get easier with time. Focus on yourself...

Lesbian Life: Sexual Feelings, sexual feelings, sexual fantasies
sexual feelings, sexual fantasies, sexual images: hello Emily, apologies for my late response. calm down, you are ok. well for sure you can t hide the fact that you are into women.. and there might be a chance you are a lesbian. but if you like men then you are a bisexual. there are homophobic out...

Lesbian Life: Sexual Feelings, sexual feelings, sexual fantasies
sexual feelings, sexual fantasies, sexual images: Hello, and sorry for the late reply. Well its really hard since shes already with someone, the age difference is not a big issue. It would be different if she was single, but since she s not it makes things a bit harder. You may be a bit curious since you...

Lesbian Life: Sexual Feelings, sexual feelings, sexual fantasies
sexual feelings, sexual fantasies, sexual images: Dear Reader, Being a lesbian is not only about, sexual feelings though these are sometimes part of the picture. If you have read my column before, you probably know that I prefer the phrase, affectional orientation to, sexual orientation. ...

Lesbian Life: unwanted sexual attention, unwanted sexual attention, unwanted sexual advances
unwanted sexual attention, unwanted sexual advances, good relationship: hello, Scabs well firstly what i have to tell you is that there is no solution to stop unwanted sexual attraction between you and your mate from the out side world. i mean, in general if a particular person sees you and they like you obviously that person...

Lesbian Life: co-worker.... too much?, mischievous smile, smile on her face
mischievous smile, smile on her face, dangerous road: hi there May, I think you know the answer to that, yes you did go a little to far. I think that this is a work place and it should be strictly business oriented. And that there are people around watching and knowing that she is married. Who says that...

Lesbian Life: Coming out ..A Lesbian, sexual orientation, norms
sexual orientation, norms, desires: hello Brooke, Brooke, if we worry about what people thinks about us, or what society believe or think that we should follow the norms, all of us would go crazy. if you don t want anybody to know your gay, just keep it to yourself, don t tell people about...

Lesbian Life: confused 19yr old girl, naked guy, guy friends
naked guy, guy friends, naked girl: hey dp, definitely you are confused, because you sound confusing to me, but i managed to read and understand some of the things your saying and what you are going through. you just need to know some meanings of certain, instance in the gay world. so let...

Lesbian Life: Girl Crush, pet name, clue
Lesbian Life: Girl Crush, pet name, clue, relationships

Lesbian Life: our first time together, making love, having sex
making love, having sex, horizons: Hey Amanda, Well if it s going to be her first time, and you do not want to use your fingers and tongue only, you can use what is called a dildo, if you also want to spice up your relationship. Or you can take a visit to the sex shop there are many other...

Lesbian Life: Girl Crush, girl crush, friend claire
girl crush, friend claire, time id: hey there confused, your name says it all, you are surely confused. Hold it down, You sound like your going crazy for a while, but i understand what you are going through. You said that you are straight, but the question is are you truly straight? since...

Lesbian Life: Girl I might, girl age, strong word
girl age, strong word, mouths: hello there Unsure, well, reader, you sound like your bi curious. your not a lesbian because your attracted to both sex. I will not say that you love her, lol i mean, love is such a strong word or to much of a strong word to use in this incident. but i...

Lesbian Life: How do I know if my friend likes me?, dating girls, unhappy face
dating girls, unhappy face, cute guy: dear reader, There s no sure way to tell what your friend s intentions are except to ask. So what I suggest you do it have a talk with her about it. Ask her if she has ever thought of you as more than a friend. You already know she is gay, so you already...

Lesbian Life: Questioning, feelings, tv show
feelings, tv show, girls: Honestly, don t wonder what you are constantly. The easiest way to figure out who you are is to feel. If you get caught up in the titles you might lose yourself. Some people think oh I like girls, I m a lesbian. even when they might be bisexual or pansexual....

Lesbian Life: 8 year age difference?, friend zone, age is just a number
friend zone, age is just a number, homebody: Well personally I have always found the saying age is just a number to be pretty true. You may want to try and get close to her as friends first and maybe drop a few hints that you like her. You don t want to be stuck in the friend zone. Maybe get to know...

Lesbian Life: How do I tell my parents?, honesty, relationship
Lesbian Life: How do I tell my parents?, honesty, relationship

Lesbian Life: Help, mind women, going to hell
mind women, going to hell, beloved friend: Hello, I m 18 years old, as I m sure you know from my profile, and I grew up in a mennonite family. Mennonite s are extremely orthodox. However, I am not very religious myself. I do however understand the idea of conflict with your feelings. It may seem like...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian or Bisexual?, emotional attraction, false hope
emotional attraction, false hope, perfect man: If you aren t attracted to men then you just aren t. Convincing yourself that you are bisexual will only cause future problems. It may give your family false hope and make it harder to settle down when you finally do find a woman you want to be with. If your...

Lesbian Life: How do I tell my parents?, mum dad, whever
mum dad, whever, religious family: Well, maybe you should consider not telling them for a while. Parents aren t likely to believe you when you are younger anyways. It may be easier to keep this to yourself rather then face their wrath. I know it sounds crazy but sometimes you have to live your...

Lesbian Life: trying to understand my girlfriend, lesbian relationship, independent woman
lesbian relationship, independent woman, facebook: Well, personally I would never consider that cheating. I think you should apologize and make sure she understands that you only love her. Let her know that the other girl was only your friend and nothing more. Maybe try getting her flowers and giving her a...

Lesbian Life: does arousal mean i'am a lesbian?, sexual orientation, 2 women
sexual orientation, 2 women, kelsey: Hello, Just because you are excited by women does not make you a lesbian, however, you are probably bisexual. I know of many women who were sexually attracted to women and most dated men. However, they all eventually found 1 or 2 women that they actually...

Lesbian Life: How to get her attention., straightforward answer, m tech
straightforward answer, m tech, stairwell: Flirting doesn t have a straightforward answer. You might not know how to flirt but just being yourself around that person is likely to bring flirtatious tendencies out. Try and be friends and then try to hint that you think she s pretty or special or whatever...

Lesbian Life: confusing relationship, confusing relationship, last night i had a dream
confusing relationship, last night i had a dream, exes: I know a lot of girls who are bisexual but are very picky about one gender or the other. Two of my exes for instances dated me for 6 months to a year and have never before or after dated another girl. It is entirely possible that you are bisexual you just...

Lesbian Life: Confusion, criminal punishments, living in abu dhabi
criminal punishments, living in abu dhabi, hormone treatments: Clearly you love her. However, you should probably keep these feelings to yourself while you are in that country. I read up on the criminal punishments and it doesn t sound pleasant. Some of it results in death, hormone treatments, and many other punishments....

Lesbian Life: I'll do anything to save this relationship, massive attention, step dad
massive attention, step dad, ups and downs: Honestly it sounds like your in a currently unhealthy relationship. Now, that isn t entirely unsalvageable but it isn t healthy to stay in. I would recommend that you two take a break. Explain to her you feel like she doesn t give you attention. Maybe try...

Lesbian Life: Married and confused, highschool sweetheart, thinking about women
highschool sweetheart, thinking about women, sexual thing: You should think of your personal happiness. You should look to going for what you want and although it may hurt your husband the best thing you can do is go for what you want. So, I would recommend you tell him how you feel and talk it over with him. Just...

Lesbian Life: how to tell my kids im lesbian?, 6 years, 3 years
6 years, 3 years, girlfriend: I m not necessarily the best person to help you with this but I do know that the younger a kid is the easier it will be for them to accept it. However, a kid that young won t fully understand what you are saying until they are older. It would be best to just...

Lesbian Life: What did I do wrong?, field interest, couple drinks
field interest, couple drinks, white wine: This is a complicated question to answer. Your friend, Chelsea is one of the few people I know of to cut someone out of their life for a slight attraction. I would recommend you try and move on from this experience. Waiting for her probably isn t wise. If...

Lesbian Life: Codependency, alanon meetings, nar anon
alanon meetings, nar anon, true relationship: Hi, I know how it feels and what you are going through.. This is not because I get to talk or write to many with this but my own experience. It is not about 51/2 years or say 2 years or even the time but it is about how much one lose herself to love...

Lesbian Life: Confused and looking for perspective, emotional mess, hey bobby
emotional mess, hey bobby, sexual relationships: Hi, Sorry for the late response.. From what you have written above I understand you always had strong feelings towards girls and this was supressed within you because of the happenings in your school and the your parents explanation to the subject. You...

Lesbian Life: Confusion, affectional orientation, gaydar
affectional orientation, gaydar, renting a room: Dear Reader, It would not be unheard of that if you have been mistreated by men, you might feel mistrusting toward men. But, considering a whole separate sexual (or affectional) orientation, as a result would be pretty far-fetched. Also, some women may...

Lesbian Life: Crush on a girl, don't know sexuality, time conversations, gender relationships
time conversations, gender relationships, concrete answer: Hi, I can understand your situation. You can t ask her openly for the fear of losing her and keeping it within you without a concrete answer feels miserable. But then again there has to be a starting point somewhere to conclude things.. Let s go slow...

Lesbian Life: Codependency, coda group, miracles in progress
Lesbian Life: Codependency, coda group, miracles in progress

Lesbian Life: She keeps pushing me away...., blah blah, long stretch
blah blah, long stretch, 4 months: Hi, Sorry for the delayed response.. Well is this the same girl whom you had mentioned the last time you wrote to me.. I understand she is very different from you and that absolutely is no harm at all but the greatest concern over here is - Is she really...

Lesbian Life: l think l've fallen in a very short time., bull by the horns, face book
bull by the horns, face book, sales lady: Dear Reader, She s right. No contact is exactly the path to take here. First, you have each been less than candid with the other -- what kind of a foundation is that, for a solid relationship? This sounds like something that is headed for grief and disappointment,...

Lesbian Life: lesbianism, relationship, shopping
relationship, shopping: Hi, Very sorry for the late response... Well, what is her approach to the same gender relationship. Please understand that as it is very important to understand her feeling towards this before you lose yourself for her. If she is of the same kind...

Lesbian Life: I'm so confused, schedule time, t text
schedule time, t text, jan 24: Hi, Sorry for the delayed response. As much as I could understand staying away from each other or within limits was not that impossible on either sides. The best that you could do to each other is sit and talk and understand where the relationship is...

Lesbian Life: What should i do?please help.., bad shape, ups and downs
bad shape, ups and downs, good shape: Hi, Extremely sorry for the delayed response.. I strongly feel you should let her go...Firstly, when you are in true love with someone you would not go and sleep with someone else. Secondly, even sfter that happened from her side she still feels nothing...

Lesbian Life: Flirty OR Friendly?, weho, nyr
weho, nyr, gay guys: Dear Reader, Do you like her? If you don t, she may give you the look, the vibe, the swag, the smile and the whole kit and caboodle and it wouldn t make one bit of difference. In fact, her advances might make you kind of uncomfortable if you weren...

Lesbian Life: is she flirting with me?, lesbian relationship, friendly relationship
lesbian relationship, friendly relationship, beautiful smile: Dear Reader, Back away immediately. Did I read correctly, that you -- have a partner? Where is your partner, in all of this? If she matters so little to you, that you have not even mentioned anything about the relationship between you here, when this...

Lesbian Life: Lesbian Life, praying to god, relationship with god
praying to god, relationship with god, mel white: Dear Reader, Most of us, at one time or another wonder how, conventional religious teachings and homosexuality; could possibly be reconciled? If all that your clergyfolk have said were accurate, that question might be quite a dilemma. Personally,...

Lesbian Life: Always Lost, heart soul, emotional level
heart soul, emotional level, thro: Hi, Sorry for the delayed response. As much as you have explained about her she had never committed to you on a strong relationship or does not even look like she ever loved you. You were all into her but she wasn t. Anyone whom you love the most you...

Lesbian Life: Stuck, first kiss, straight woman
first kiss, straight woman, wedding anniversary: Dear Reader, You want non-judgmental advice and I will stick to that request by addressing the subject indirectly and in a general way. Generally speaking, women who are married and dating/flirting with another woman on the side; do not leave their...