About Experts Sitemap - Group 35 - Page 11 2016-08-23

Marriage: Filing child support after a new marriage, child support, 5 months
child support, 5 months, two friends: Hi Beth~ No, it doesn t effect her chances at all, whether she s married or not, she needs to file for child support so that he can start supporting their child. Her being married and her future spouses income has absolutely nothing to do with how much...

Marriage: What The Heck Is Going ON???, marriage counseling, crisis theory
marriage counseling, crisis theory, going out of my mind: There is no ‘cook book’ answer, ‘to do list’ or a ready made Q-A type of a respond to your current question. From your wife’s point of view, it is safe to assume that there were continues disturbing factors, which were unknown to you, and therefore continuously...

Marriage: Husband is impulsive, joseph abraham, relationship issues
joseph abraham, relationship issues, basic foundation: Anger, temper and upset mood are problems that have many explanations, theories and treatment approaches. Mine is that everything relates to relationship: either to yourself, or to your significant other(s). This is the underlying basic foundation. ...

Marriage: Husband Not Working, part time jobs, second marriages
part time jobs, second marriages, cdl: Hi Pam, I am concerned that he is not willing to hold a job in order to support his wife. This doesn t show very strong character. You are walking a fine line with regards to his taking care of his son. You want to be supportive of his efforts to...

Marriage: Husband won't talk to me about our marriage problems., joseph abraham, marriage problems
joseph abraham, marriage problems, dr joseph: Since the family is a system, each component has the capacity to influence the others. You are encouraged therefore to seek immediate counseling. Once you start, the chances are high that your husband would either join or be influenced by your initiative....

Marriage: My husband received a letter from his classmate's mom...., detective work, gut feeling
detective work, gut feeling, classmate: Well it probably isn t normal, but hardly anything is these days. In a marriage you have to have a degree of trust for one another, or the marriage isn t really worth much. You ve heard the saying trust but verify, that may be a suggestion here. Monitor his...

Marriage: Marriage Enrichment Vacation, marriage retreat, marriage enrichment
marriage retreat, marriage enrichment, happy marriage: Allyson, I am not real sure where you will be able to find a marriage retreat. I would recommend that if you do attend church to ask the pastor if he has one he can send you to. Church offices get things like this all the time and most likely there is one...

Marriage: Marriage in trouble, help!, part time jobs, joseph abraham
part time jobs, joseph abraham, marriage in trouble: The marriage problem is secondary. The primary problem could be solved by a vocational counseling that your husband should take. There are private as well as public funded agencies around your area, or he can use on-line services, like mine. Regards,...

Marriage: Moving away from my family, long distance friend, family question
long distance friend, family question, daugher: Hello again, When they show up at the school and then say you are refusing them visitation, this is going too far. This is really turning into slander. There comes a time when you have to confront issues and if you read Matthew 18:15-18, this will...

Marriage: mariage consling, male classmates, face change
male classmates, face change, conservative family: Your situation is not easy: you are married to whom you love, but you have realized that he is loaded with an 18th century alarming attitude regarding women in general and a proper wife’s behavior in particular. So be your own psychologist and do the assessment:...

Marriage: marriage
Natasha, I have not heard back from you and I want to help you. Please contact me through my website. Fill out the form in the CONTACTS page and I will get ahold of you from my e-mail address. There is no charge for help, so don t worry about that. I...

Marriage: marriage help, marriage help, losing battles
marriage help, losing battles, counceling: Well you ve probably suffered with it long enough. People that like to make their spouses angry or insecure really have no feelings or misplaced feelings for them. Marriages that survive are filled with negotiations, give and takes, and both partners are supposed...

Marriage: marriage troubles, marriage troubles, immigration lawyer
marriage troubles, immigration lawyer, relationship issues: First, please go to: http://dr-joseph.blogspot.com/2008/06/low-chance-to-save-this-marriage.html Second, You both need a professional help here, since the relationship issues are very complex and not too simple to solve. There is no ‘cook book’...

Marriage: Relationship on the Brink of Explosion, college survival kit, ramen noodles
college survival kit, ramen noodles, lunch hour: Anger, temper and upset mood are problems that have many explanations, theories and treatment approaches. Mine is that everything relates to relationship: either to yourself, or to your significant other(s). This is the underlying basic foundation. You...

Marriage: I have tried everything!!!!!, purchasing a new car, marriage work
purchasing a new car, marriage work, red flags: Hi Temika, Sometimes you just have to throw in the towel. He doesn t want to work, has been abusive to you, unfaithful, and isn t interested in changing after counseling. Do you see any red flags here? I sure do... Divorce is sometimes necessary...

Marriage: troubled marriage, joseph abraham, troubled marriage
joseph abraham, troubled marriage, unhappy marriage: Marriage is something that you should try to keep and heal. The emotional, social and financial costs of a divorce should be prevented, if possible. You are encouraged therefore to try a professional help before final decision. Regards, Dr....

Marriage: goes away for weekend once a month, heart to heart talk, heart to heart
heart to heart talk, heart to heart, medical treatment: Hi Dee~ This is a huge issue for you to deal with. You need to sit down and have a serious heart to heart talk with him. He needs to know exactly how you feel about this. And what you re willing and unwilling to put up with in this marriage. If he can...

Marriage: 2 1/2 yr of marriage, pastor kim, christian marriages
pastor kim, christian marriages, god doesn: Hi Adrienne, Is he still cheating on you and lying, etc? Or has this all been forgiven and put behind? Is he still disrespecting you? Is he a Christian or only you? Divorce is not against God s will in certain circumstances. If his behavior is...

Marriage: Annoyed newlywed, worry wart, topical skin
worry wart, topical skin, bathroom floor: Hi... Welcome to the world of marriage!! You will find all kinds of things that are going to annoy you, so you have to start learning to pick your battles... Your husband is very inconsiderate of your feelings by verbally abusing you. That is just...

Marriage: arranged marriages vs love marriages, marriage success, relationship success
marriage success, relationship success, better success: Hi Ben, Arranged marriages tend to have a better success rate then the U.S. love marriages so. Arranged marriages however find more pressure not to divorce or separate as it affects the family s honor as well as the individuals in the relationship. ...

Marriage: Big Age Gap, I am talking HUGE, WOW?, ostrich boots, age gap
ostrich boots, age gap, roller skates: Hi Charles~ I d say you have over a 50-50 chance for everything going in your favor with her staying with you and being dedicated to one another. However, there are no guarantees in life, well, besides you pay taxes and die. LOL! I think your chances...

Marriage: his change of heart, experience symptoms, change of heart
experience symptoms, change of heart, body language: … I love him, but there has never been any passion between us… his body language is very closed off. He hasn t really talked to me or touched me in weeks... Avoidance of intimacy and sex are, upon my experience, symptoms, not causes. You therefore would...

Marriage: disagreeing, joseph abraham, time to say good bye
joseph abraham, time to say good bye, dr abraham: Are you good roommates? If so, it is time to say good-bye, or call a professional counselor. Do you have good vital signs (intimacy, sexuality, friendship, committement)? If so, you do not need the arguments to prove that you are there. Regards, ...

Marriage: engagement, engagement ring, connie
engagement ring, connie, left hand: Hi Connie~ It s whatever you re comfortable doing. Since he s going through a divorce, it s probably okay to wear it, even though it s not final yet. If it doesn t feel right to wear it on your left hand, then wear it on the right hand until the divorce...

Marriage: The ex, mother and grandmother, core family
mother and grandmother, core family, true character: Hi Sarah, His words were not backed by truth, and you have stated that in your own message. When you love someone, you do not do these things. Simple as that. To get past the feeling you have, you need to view it from a different standpoint. Kid...

Marriage: The ex, mother and grandmother, desperate time
mother and grandmother, desperate time, core family: Hi Sarah~ You have to stop letting your ego get in the way of things. You can t control how he acts (or others), but you do control how you react to him. Why let him have that power over you, he wins when you feel like this (and he doesn t even have to...

Marriage: The ex, mother and grandmother, core family
mother and grandmother, core family, dr joseph: It is usually most advisable not to look backward, but to step forward. Concentrate on your social and dating effort rather than the effort to correct and change the past. If you need further professional help, please consider my services; see http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: how to not feel resentful towards future spouse, marriage blessings, pastor kim
marriage blessings, pastor kim, lord and savior: Hi Angela, I am getting HUGE RED FLAGS as I read your letter. I don t think you are ready to get married to this man. You really shouldn t be living with him, along with your children, before you are married. God is clear on this in His Word... You...

Marriage: Heading into a separation, mail accounts, line conversation
mail accounts, line conversation, overwhelming need: Hi David, Thanks for elaborating. I m happy that you see that you need to step back and allow her to find out what she wants. Absence, it is said, makes the heart grow fonder. It allows one to experience the feeling of loss that is connected to not having...

Marriage: Husband wants to be a rock star, personal development coach, joseph abraham
personal development coach, joseph abraham, marriage counseling: You both do need a professional help. Do not use the do it yourself method. Offer my online phone / web-cam involvement, for a vocational counseling and a good check-up of your mutual emotional and cognitive assets that each of you had brought and may...

Marriage: My husband..., instant messages, vows
instant messages, vows, ex gf: Dear Carrie, For some reason, he does not believe that you will truly leave him. What I see, is that he is disrespecting you by doing these things. If you truly want him to respect you, then you need to follow through with what you say at all times. I m not...

Marriage: My husband is smothering me, abusive relationship, girls night
abusive relationship, girls night, girl friends: Let us go first to the more common sense explanation: I assume that from your husband’s point of view, there is not enough intimacy and sex, especially when the children are not at home... Once men feel neglected or disappointed, they develop all kinds...

Marriage: husband still in contact with ex mistress, slap in the face, emotional support
slap in the face, emotional support, family friend: The only thing you really have is trust. Your husband may not have had a good track record. We have to try hard to look to the future and forget the past. If we stay in the past we will be unable to see the future that God has for us. Stay looking forward...

Marriage: Jealousy, joseph abraham, natural signal
joseph abraham, natural signal, paranoid personality: Jealousy may be dysfunctional, once it origins from a paranoid personality. Usually, however, it is a strong healthy natural signal of being discomfort regarding the strength of a relationship. If your wife has been happy with you prior to your “episodes”...

Marriage: jealousy, daughter visits, having time
daughter visits, having time, intimacy: I’m not sure that my reply is according to your expectation… I do not have a “real” answer for you. First, your situation is not about his daughter. Second, I do not see good chances of success without involving your husband. Obviously, I recommend...

Marriage: lazy husband, lazy husband, ups and downs
lazy husband, ups and downs, physical fights: There are two alarming statements in your letter: ...even had a few physical fights... and ...now here goes the root of this problems: he spends to much time on the internet talking to his past friends… Your overall situation is complex. There is no...

Marriage: Marriage, friends houses, 22 years
friends houses, 22 years, feelings: Hi Gabriel~ It s not uncommon for a couple that s been married for many years or as long as you have to have this happen. You ve just grown apart from her over the years. I m sure this was devastating for her to hear you say to her. However, it s not...

Marriage: Marriage, high school sweethearts, family god
high school sweethearts, family god, spiritual leader: Tod Hall, Just to make you feel better I think we have all felt this way at times. I have always told couples in this situation that marriage is hard. I know that most people would like to think that marriage is like it shows in the movies. You have spent...

Marriage: my marriage is ending and i don't no if i want to save it, having an affair, saying things
having an affair, saying things, infront: Hi Terri, It is possible that he is having an affair. That is something you need to investigate further, if you have suspicions... You both need to stop arguing infront of the children. This is affecting them DEEPLY. I cannot stress this enough to...

Marriage: New to Marriage, joining a gym, punching bag
joining a gym, punching bag, frustrations: Hi Renea~ He s not being very sensitive to your thoughts, feelings and needs right now. And when you try to express this to him he s taking it all wrong as in you re trying to control him/smoother him, etc. Which, of course, isn t your intention at all....

Marriage: I need advice about my husband, heart to heart talk, gut instincts
heart to heart talk, gut instincts, communication ability: Hi Jasmine~ He very well could be being unfaithful to you. Or he could be just preoccupied with things going on in his life and/or around him and he s not ignoring you intentionally. What do your gut instincts tell you is happening? Always, always trust...

Marriage: Remarried With Children, cook book, rebuttal
cook book, rebuttal, wits: Thanks Matha for contacting me! I’m not sure however that my reply is according to your expectation… I do not have a “real” answer for you. There is no ‘cook book’ answer, ‘to do list’ or a ready made Q-A type of response to your current question(s). Furthermore,...

Marriage: Self Confidence, dr phil mcgraw, confidence issue
dr phil mcgraw, confidence issue, self matters: Hi Josh~ Since you re wanting to work on your self-esteem and image. I would strongly suggest that you check out a book written by Dr. Phil McGraw called Self Matters. I ve read it, it s a very good book too. You can find it in any reputable bookstore...

Marriage: Separation involving children, marriage counseling, taking the pills
marriage counseling, taking the pills, precancerous conditions: Hi Yasmita~ He has to learn to stop being so critical of you. Otherwise, he s only going to end up driving you further and further away from him. If a separation is what it takes to make him wake up, then do that. He has to realize that you re not going...

Marriage: sexless mariage, pre mature ejaculation, anger depression
pre mature ejaculation, anger depression, feelings of inadequacy: Dear Kerry, Do you remember anything happening between the two of you before the two year abstinence? There could be a variety of reasons why this is occurring. It may be due to pre-mature ejaculation and he is worried that he will ejaculate too soon and...

Marriage: sexless marraige, joseph abraham, sexless marriage
joseph abraham, sexless marriage, divorce lawyer: Sexless marriage is very unhealthy, for both partners. Sex is not for men only. The joy of sex is a Good’s gift that is equally shared by both genders. Sexuality is highly correlated with joy of life, feeling of love and loyalty. Avoidance of intimacy and...

Marriage: Taking my name after marriage, r s jones, rosalee
r s jones, rosalee, first names: Hi David, There is not too many options in this situation, and it becomes even more limiting without hyphenation. Hyphenation does become burdensome and I completely understand her feelings in wanting the same name as her children. You may want to think about...

Marriage: Trial Separation, glimmer of hope, promise after promise
glimmer of hope, promise after promise, responsible decisions: Dear Corey, Yes, I do believe that there is hope for this marriage. It sounds like you truly want to be with her and your children and that you are ready to do anything to get them back. So, what is even more honorable in the eyes of your children and your...

Marriage: under age marriage, marriage annulled, clerk of the court
marriage annulled, clerk of the court, age of consent: Hi Patty~ The answer to this is most likely no. In most states the age of consent is 17, with 18 being legally an adult. And since she was present at your wedding, didn t object to it, took you to get your license, etc. It would look pretty bad on her...

Marriage: Wife is using the internet to meet men for chat., diagnosis of autism, intense sex
diagnosis of autism, intense sex, alcoholic family: I do not see good chances of success without involving a professional help. Obviously, I recommend opening the line of communication between the two of you, but it is easy said than done. You need a structural method that would open the line of communication...

Marriage: Wondering if it's the beginning of the end for our marriage?, selfish pride, great relationship
selfish pride, great relationship, walking the walk: Hi Melissa, You can belong to God without going to church. I hope you know this. But it is a good idea to go and your husband should be the one leading the whole family there. If he is a Christian, he certainly is not walking the walk if he is being...

Marriage: What should I do?, joseph abraham, violent person
joseph abraham, violent person, trust issues: I think that the main issue is not her attitude, but yours: ...I m having trust issues with her right now ... and therefore you both need an aggreid mediator, that will open the coounication line between the two of you. The best is finding a professional...

Marriage: What should I do?, vacation period, serious relationship
vacation period, serious relationship, violent person: Hi Joe, Sorry for the delay. I forgot to set up my vacation period. I m sorry to hear that you are having some trouble, and would like to mention that if you felt you had to have a relationship outside of your marriage due to neglect, then there were...

Marriage: 3 Eager Fiance's = 1 Big Problem, romantic relationships, physical chemistry
romantic relationships, physical chemistry, quandry: allison, You are going to have to pick one and soon. If they find out about each other then you may loose them all. You have to be brutal because you have created a situation that no one else can take credit for. If you are honest you may prevent 4 lives...

Marriage: 3 Eager Fiance's = 1 Big Problem, romantic relationships, physical chemistry
romantic relationships, physical chemistry, quandry: Hi Allison~ I just can t even begin to fathom that you can have literally 3 fiancees at once!!!!! That s nuts in my opinion. I m not trying to be rude here. But did you did have a hard time telling anyone of the them no or that you need to at least think...

Marriage: 3 Eager Fiance's = 1 Big Problem, romantic relationships, physical chemistry
romantic relationships, physical chemistry, quandry: Dear Allison, Thank you for the wonderful ratings and nomination! That was very sweet! One thing I m curious about is, have you told these two bachelors about the other? I m sure you haven t told them all the details, but have you mentioned them in a nonchalant...

Marriage: Is it abuse?, absolute nightmare, depression meds
absolute nightmare, depression meds, going fishing: Lindsey, No, it is not abuse. But Yes, it is a very complex stress reaction, probably induced by the marriage and the difficulty to cope with this step. The refusal to take medication is a part of the syndrome. Since there is no ‘cook book’ answer,...

Marriage: I believe my husband is a bit controlling?, reasonable hour, red carpet
reasonable hour, red carpet, text msg: Hi Sophia~ You should listen to your friend s mother, mothers are often very smart and full of wisdom and experience in life. They can also see what you either refuse or can t see, from an outsider s point of view. His response was rather curt and rude...

Marriage: Divorce and New Child, child support amount, new girlfriend
child support amount, new girlfriend, enough money: Hi Jo~ No, the only reason she d be able to take you back to court and raise your child support would be if you made more money, thus she d be entitled to a raise in her current child support amount. Jealously has no place in court and it doesn t have...

Marriage: Divorce in progress, heart to heart talk, marriage counseling
heart to heart talk, marriage counseling, heart to heart: Hi Nichole~ You can wait until the papers are served, if you wish. But if you have something else to respond to then do so. You want to make sure that you do everything in a timely fashion so that you don t have to prolong the divorce process. Yes, do...

Marriage: Divorced yet dating each other again., joseph abraham, control freak
joseph abraham, control freak, stupid mistake: 1. Is it common? 5-10% of divorcees, according to my personal experience (which is not scientific evidence) do this stupid mistake. 2. Do you think this will be for the time being or a permanent change? Most do so to get sex with a safe partner or...

Marriage: Why doesn't she want the marriage to work, strong work ethic, family gatherings
strong work ethic, family gatherings, wifes family: Hi Pete~ I m going to copy and paste your questions here, and then put my answers/opinions to them underneath. This way it ll be a lot easier to read and understand. **Can I do anything to shine the light for her on the damaging effect a divorce will...

Marriage: doubting marriage, monotone voice, getting pissed
monotone voice, getting pissed, rare occasion: Hi Grace~ He could possibly be depressed. Or he s truly unhappy with certain situations in the marriage, but he s telling you he is happy so that you don t pry more and ask him what s the matter, etc. The point is you can t make him do something that...

Marriage: 3 Eager Fiance's = 1 Big Problem, short temper, stable job
Marriage: 3 Eager Fiance's = 1 Big Problem, short temper, stable job, different cultures

Marriage: financial support for daughter marrying, parenting, family counselling
parenting, family counselling: Dear Tina, Probably you are right almost 99% and father is just helping her daughter blindly which inturn is affecting her daughter in long run. I would suggest you to take father & daughter to a counselor and then get them session on responsibility. Daughter...

Marriage: Hateful, jealous, angry, manipulative mother-in-law, stay at home mom, month old baby
stay at home mom, month old baby, tank tops: Hi Eliza~ Boy, she s a selfish, sad, pathetic, unhappy little person isn t she?! That s really convenient that she s blaming you for all the problems in her life, her son s life, her unhappiness, etc, I think that s rather funny personally. It s always...

Marriage: Help please! Pregnant and parents forcing me into marriage!, current boyfriend, first daughter
current boyfriend, first daughter, couple days: Hi Maureen~ It s very easy for parents to be very critical of their children. And to try and tell them what to do with their lives. I think that most parents mean well, and only want the best for their children. However, you re parents can t tell you...

Marriage: Help please! Pregnant and parents forcing me into marriage!, current boyfriend, first daughter
current boyfriend, first daughter, couple days: Hi Maureen, You state that you are both not ready for marriage.....I am a bit confused. What is it about marriage that you feel is more difficult to commit to than actually bringing a child into this world? It would seem to me that if you are able to commit...

Marriage: Help please! Pregnant and parents forcing me into marriage!, current boyfriend, first daughter
current boyfriend, first daughter, couple days: Maureen, With your age in mind then I do not see how your parents can dictate what you have to do. If you are not ready for marriage then do not do it. So many people get married because of a child and that is just not always the answer. If you lay it out...

Marriage: Husband's obsession is worrying me..., king food, sexy lingerie
king food, sexy lingerie, food outlet: Michelle, I’m not familiar with the phenomena of masturbating around food or food pictures; however, I do suspect that your husband is masturbating while fantasizing about kids and that is why he prefers to be around fast food shops. If indeed this is...

Marriage: Husband says doesn't love me - time to give up?, dr abraham, marriage counseling
dr abraham, marriage counseling, troubled marriage: Meg, Use this ‘event’ with the lady as a good opportunity to re-assess your marriage relationship. Marriage is a long term reciprocal relationship and therefore any one’s ‘Mood Change’, should be taken as the couple’s mutual output. Something in the...

Marriage: help, joseph abraham, communication pattern
joseph abraham, communication pattern, dr joseph: Jennifer, Since there is no ‘cook book’ answer, ‘to do list’ or a ready made Q-A type of response to your and your husband s current situation, I do not see good chances of success without involving an ongoing professional counseling help. Do...

Marriage: husband filing for divorce, intimacy and sexuality, joseph abraham
intimacy and sexuality, joseph abraham, spiritual experiences: Heidi, The situation that you described is not hopeless. A professional counseling process can reveal the missing parts in your relationship and guide you to implement the proper re-structuring of your marriage (in terms of shared values, intimacy and sexuality,...

Marriage: my husband is living two personalities, first year of marriage, lover and friend
first year of marriage, lover and friend, sexual relation: Hi Nancy~ He s playing mind games with you, and trying to play you for a fool. He s insulting your intelligence when he s saying he s just friends with her, and that they aren t sexually involved, or emotionally caught up together, etc, etc. Thus why...

Marriage: My husband's problem is stressing me out a lot..., king food, sexy lingerie
king food, sexy lingerie, food outlet: Hi Michelle~ Honestly, for once in all the times that I ve been answering questions for allexperts.com I m totally and utterly speechless. And I ve been volunteering my time here for over 8 yrs now. I can t even begin to imagine how embarrassing and shocking...

Marriage: Not sure what my husband is thinking, long distance relationship, ups and downs
long distance relationship, ups and downs, intension: Hi Ani, i definetly see hope for both as you love each other. Again i can t put in words & from one paragraph of your question. You really need to sit down and relax your self and think why you are hesitating to meet a counselor even though i told you things...

Marriage: no intamacy, intamacy, information pls
intamacy, information pls, intimacy: HI Steve, There are many reason a woman may not like intimacy and most are very delicate issues. How was this issue when you two were dating? Was it the same thing? Give me a bit more information, and perhaps we can try to pinpoint the reason so that...

Marriage: We lost everything and now my husband of 5 yrs wants to leave me & our children, bitter custody battle, living the american dream
bitter custody battle, living the american dream, answer men: I just told you, a few hours ago, about the ways men are building their status. Please re-read. Now I advice you to read the case summary at http://www.dr-joseph.com/Familiy-help.html It may look to you that the story there is about a different issue....

Marriage: lost and very little hope., counselling, marriage counselling
counselling, marriage counselling: Hi Tina, yes, it happens. Best way will be to sit down with a counselor and go over issues which are creating distance in relationship. Most probably in 1 or 2 sessions if you both work you will have your honemoon stage again. cheers Sharma http://www.transformlifestyle.co...

Marriage: Marriage, baby classes, ultimatums
baby classes, ultimatums, collegue: Hi Cira, I am a bit on the fence with this. I m leaning towards thinking that your husband is having an issue with another person or the thought that he simply is not really understanding what marriage is all about. It looks to me like he just wasn t ready...

Marriage: Marriage, cultures of the world, gods eyes
cultures of the world, gods eyes, eyes of god: Hi Sonya, I m sorry this is late, but I answered this last Friday but somehow it didn t go through. I ll answer again... To be married in the eyes of God is separate than being married in the eyes of the government. The Bible doesn t say anything...

Marriage: Marriage and how to leave for the 3rd time?, blood sugars, abusive marriage
blood sugars, abusive marriage, cycle of abuse: Hi Jodi~ You have to make the third time the charm and break this ugly vicious cycle of abuse once and for all. Abusers are very good at saying they are sorry, but then continuing to abuse. You have to stop enabling him by lying about all the things he...

Marriage: Menopause, guilt feelings, interaction effect
guilt feelings, interaction effect, low self esteem: Paul, I assume that there is an interaction effect: each factor could be handled, but the joint effect is overwhelming. Your daughter depressive mood calls for a lot of concern; it may elicit your wife’s guilt feelings (are there some relationship issues...

Marriage: marriage, renee, quite some time
renee, quite some time, feelings: Hi Renee~ There s no easy way to break the news to him. You ve been unhappy for quite some time now. You just have to come out and tell him. There is that slight chance that he ll get angry and act defensively, but that s the risk you take when you have...

Marriage: marriage in constant turmoil, heart strength, ministry god
heart strength, ministry god, blended family: Hi women at the well ~ You sound like you both have a lot on your plate, with the children, you being dedicated to the youth ministry of the church, etc. Marriage is a constant work in progress. It s about two ppl working together as a team, doing teamwork....

Marriage: marriage/jealousy, joseph abraham, divorce agreement
joseph abraham, divorce agreement, lawyers fees: Mayra, Wait. Consider your steps, plan your 1-2 years, come to a divorce agreement, and only thereafter you and your husband would approach the children. Do not do it by yourself. I assume that you would benefit a lot from a structural method that would...

Marriage: marriage problem, joseph abraham, marriage problem
joseph abraham, marriage problem, relationship issues: Regina, Anger, temper and upset mood are problems that have many explanations, theories and treatment approaches. Mine is that everything relates to relationship: either to yourself, or to your significant other(s). This is the underlying basic foundation....

Marriage: I NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP, marriage counseling, humble man
marriage counseling, humble man, living a lie: Hi Rena~ This man is all that you want that your husband is not. However, the grass isn t always greener on the other side, as the saying goes. It seems as though you haven t been happy in quite some time. And what you ve been lacking in your current...

Marriage: new mariage, joseph abraham, woody allen
joseph abraham, woody allen, dr joseph: We have seen this episode in Woody Allen s life story and his adopted daughter that he finally married. We all know that this was a very unusual case. The chance for a similar case to succeed is slim indeed. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com...

Marriage: When is it okay to quit?, son in my eyes, romantic friendship
son in my eyes, romantic friendship, vacumed: Dear Juliet, It sounds like you are in a difficult situation. Besides the fact that your husband is not doing his duties in this marriage, I am concerned about your son. Do you know why your son is having difficulty? Is everything OK in his life? Do you know...

Marriage: PRE~MARRIAGE, 1 corinthians 7, creation god
1 corinthians 7, creation god, bible verse: Peter, I am going to give you all the verses I can find on marriage and husbands and wifes. This should give you all you need. Really look over these and consider what they have to say to you. If you have questions about any one then just go to that chapter...

Marriage: Relationship and children .., masters program, emotional time
masters program, emotional time, raising kids: Hi Daniel, You have the right idea. The kids are the first priority. If your companion has a mind of her own, she will base her decisions on what she feels and what she believes your relationship will bring her in the way of happiness. Your kids are...

Marriage: He's not ready for marriage..., comfort zone, husband wife
comfort zone, husband wife, close friends: Maria, He is just living like you have given him the permission to live. He thinks that you have been with him for so long that he doesn t have to do anything and you will be there. You need to make him believe that you are going to move on with your life...

Marriage: Doing the right thing, morals and values, being a father
morals and values, being a father, loving kind: Hi Tybrus, Your long explanation was necessary and I understand what the situation is. I ll keep my answer to you short. When you married your wife, you made the decision. you have time to think it over, and you decided. It was your commitment, for...

Marriage: Separation / Depression, moderate depression, single mom
moderate depression, single mom, cymbalta: Michael, Marriage is a long term reciprocal relationship and therefore any one’s ‘Mood Change’, either towards children or to the spouse should be taken as the couple’s mutual output. Something in the relationship triggered the situation. Blaming ‘bad...

Marriage: Stressed out over my husband!, ball breakers, family dinners
ball breakers, family dinners, first thought: Dear Helen, When I started to read your letter, the first thought I had was that your husband seems jealous. Many men become jealous of their babies, usually when their first one is born. They are not used to a new member in the family and the baby always...

Marriage: save my marriage after separation, verbal abuse, sister in law
verbal abuse, sister in law, wake up call: Danny, The best thing you can do at this point is to give her space. She is in a way testing that you can give her the space she has requested and to learn to have her best wishes in mind. You just have realized a tough lesson that many husbands need to...

Marriage: separation-how long????, flu bug, marriage work
flu bug, marriage work, sanca: Hi Bhavna, There is no prescribed time frame for things like this. You will have to trust your instincts. If he is making the necessary efforts, then make sure he continues to do so. Be clear on what you need from him to make the marriage work. Remind...

Marriage: should I stay?, hourly jobs, brunches
hourly jobs, brunches, christmas party: Hi Christy, I gathered that you were engaged from your first note. I suggest you tread carefully before you make the final step towards a life together. Prevention is a good thing. Be very sure that he is what you are looking for in a husband. Good...

Marriage: tired, joseph abraham, marriage history
joseph abraham, marriage history, good relationship: Haji, Since good relationship and love are complex things, there is no simple ‘cook book’ answer, ‘to do list’ or a ready made Q-A type of a respond to your current question. However, the situation that you described is not hopeless and there is a lot...

Marriage: zero intimacy in marriage, heart to heart talk, intimacy in marriage
heart to heart talk, intimacy in marriage, respectful behavior: Hi Lisa~ Beware of all that he s wanting and suggesting that you do (or that you and him do together). There are huge red flags here for me about what you ve described by his behavior. And I find this disturbing and troubling from an outsiders point of...

Marriage: Confused!, respectful man, would like your opinion
respectful man, would like your opinion, physical differences: Hi Joe, This is not a very difficult problem. I believe you were initially correct in putting aside the physical appearance because as it stands, you have been together for 6 years. That s a whole lot more than most people I know who fell in love because...

Marriage: Another child in not too good marriage?, joseph abraham, bad temper
joseph abraham, bad temper, child answer: Nadezda, I cannot comment on someone’s medical issues. Generally speaking, depression is treated better with a combination of pharmaceutical and behavior therapy (individual / marriage / family counseling). Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Depressed Husband, getting out of an abusive relationship, bar friends
getting out of an abusive relationship, bar friends, friendly man: Hi Juli~ Depression can be a very ugly thing to cope and deal with. Especially when a loved one is battling it, and he s refusing to seek any outside help at all, such as from a doctor when he really, really needs it. You can t make him do something that...

Marriage: dillema, rough patches, mild depression
rough patches, mild depression, last two months: Anchal, I assume that your issue is not about your husband’s porno habit (this is just a painful symptom) but most likely about your life with him in general and your mutual intimacy and sexuality in particular. There is no ‘cook book’ answer or a ready...

Marriage: when is enough enough, joseph abraham, free lunch
joseph abraham, free lunch, case summaries: No Angie, He loves you very much, because you have constantly treated him like a spoiled kid for so many years. Who doesn t love a free lunch? It is you who does not love yourself. Wake up Angie. Stop being stupid. You need help to re-structure your...

Marriage: Friendship, joseph abraham, marital history
joseph abraham, marital history, dr joseph: Dan, There is no ‘cook book’ answer, ‘to do list’ or a ready made Q-A type of a respond to your current question. Your description of your marital history allows me to advice that the two of you, individually as well as a couple, would immediately start...

Marriage: Marriage Trust / Snooping, wld, hubby
Marriage: Marriage Trust / Snooping, wld, hubby, eml

Marriage: HONESTY, honesty
honesty: Hi Francine, Good question. Honesty will get you lot of friends, you will be loved by lot of them. Most will depend on you for number of things. Your own life will be great but probably you will miss some things which you had sacrificed due to your honesty....

Marriage: Husband doesn't love me anymore, divorce attorney, grown daughter
divorce attorney, grown daughter, christian reformed: Vicki, There is no ‘cook book’ answer, ‘to do list’ or a ready made Q-A type of response to your and your husband s situation. I do not see good chances of success without involving professional help. Your questions requires counseling sessions. If...

Marriage: he's not happy, joseph abraham, man back
joseph abraham, man back, happy man: Roz, I’m sorry for your pain and fear, but I’m encouraged from your determination. The real problem, according to my impression, is your style of communication. Therefore, no counselor would do the job for you. You must act and speak in a new style....

Marriage: my husband hates my family, joseph abraham, therapeutic recommendation
joseph abraham, therapeutic recommendation, marriage decision: Erica, Do not pinpoint on your husband. Ask yourself, only, why your voice was not spoken well enough. This is the Empowerment issue: lack of capacity to challenge traditional forces (your marriage decision making) once it suppresses your desire or...

Marriage: Immature needy wife, credit card bills, missouri post
credit card bills, missouri post, convenience foods: Jeremy, You ask a clear cut question but life is not so easy: there is no ‘cook book’ answer or a ready made Q-A type of a respond for you. A good professional advice should be based on your dating history and curret relationship (especially intimacy...

Marriage: Interracial Marriage- And a lack of Intimicy, sexual experiences, young baby
sexual experiences, young baby, no doubt: Hi Sophie, Things change after a baby, no doubt about it. Some men have less gusto after such an event. He may see you now more as a mother than as a wife. I think that the fact he is looking at pornography can be taken as a plus if you use it properly....

Marriage: Lost Intemacy, heart to heart talk, honest to goodness
heart to heart talk, honest to goodness, enormous toll: Hi Jacques~ You need to sit down with her and have a very serious heart to heart talk with her. She needs to know exactly how this is affecting you (and I mean exactly make this crystal clear to her in detail). And what you re willing and unwilling to...

Marriage: Love marriage, legal commitment, good enough reason
legal commitment, good enough reason, right time: Bryanna, It is different for everyone, but I believe that if you have had the time to experience a great many situations that allow you to be able to make decisions that will benefit you in your life, that is a good sign of maturity. A relationship must...

Marriage: My Marriage is Falling Apart, emotional affairs, saying things
emotional affairs, saying things, last monday: Dawne, Do your best with your current counseling. It is not a good idea to have a dual effort. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com ...

Marriage: Marriage Trust / Snooping, 2 wrongs, night affair
2 wrongs, night affair, drunken night: Smiley, You ask clear cut questions but life is not so easy: there is no ‘cook book’ answer or a ready made Q-A type of a respond for you. Your question requires counseling sessions. If interested, please go to my site, see what my background is, read...

Marriage: Marriage, i want out, he doesnt, beautiful boys, 11 years
beautiful boys, 11 years, best friends: Hi Megan~ You can t help him unless he helps himself. He s just not ready to let go and move on. He s in denial that it s over between you both and you re moving on w/o him in your life. It s heartbreaking for him, but hopefully in his own time he ll...

Marriage: marriage..., colon cancer, girl on the phone
colon cancer, girl on the phone, marraige: Hi Kim~ It s unacceptable and totally inappropriate for him to be cheating on you, let alone not being supportive to you in your times of need. He s being very selfish and only thinking of his own wants and needs, not the concerns of you, the children...

Marriage: marriage in the marine corps, states marine corps, united states marine
states marine corps, united states marine, united states marine corps: Hi Leann~ In most state you have to wait 30 days until the divorce is finalized to remarry again. This law varies from state to state though and you ll have to find out what your state law is on this (sometimes it can even be 30-90 days after a divorce)....

Marriage: name calling as if in preschool, heart to heart talk, dirty mouth
heart to heart talk, dirty mouth, heart to heart: Hi Anthony~ Name calling is never okay, especially when it s an adult that s putting a child up to it. That s very immature on your wife s part and very irresponsible b/c she s teaching, leading and guiding your daughter through life as a parent. You...

Marriage: new old romance, enough money, one more thing
enough money, one more thing, new car: Hi Kelly~ Maybe he thinks he made a mistake and he s unsure if this relationship will end like it did the last time. And he s afraid of that, plus he is going through another divorce too. So he s going to probably be experiencing a lot of different emotions....

Marriage: a new old romance, enough money, one more thing
enough money, one more thing, new car: kelly, You ask a clear cut question but life is not so easy, and there is no quick fix to you situation, no ‘cook book’ answer and no ready made Q-A type of a respond for you. A good professional advice should be based on much mor date from your dating...

Marriage: a new old romance, enough money, one more thing
enough money, one more thing, new car: Hi Kelly, I think you are moving way fast. The man has been married twice already. There are a lot of children involved. I think you should sit down and your expectations and hopes so that they are clear and that there is no gray area in what you are seeking....

Marriage: My Paranoid Husband, free blowjobs, curious one
free blowjobs, curious one, vaginal sex: Cathy, I assume that your husband is not paranoid; it is probably a pride issue. There are men that need to be ‘on the top’ in the area of sexual experience. The easy way to get rid of this ‘strike’ time is to convince him that in spite of the fact...

Marriage: My Paranoid Husband, free blowjobs, curious one
free blowjobs, curious one, vaginal sex: Hi Cathy, Simple solution is to both get checked for STDs. It doesn t take long to get the results. Your hubby will feel better and so will you, and you ll be able to get back your regular sex life. Suffice it to say that sometimes our past is best...

Marriage: My Paranoid Husband, free blowjobs, curious one
free blowjobs, curious one, vaginal sex: Cathy, The first mistake was to tell him about all the guys in the bathroom. Guys want to know but at the same time they just want you to tell them a few and then leave it alone. He is just really freaked out and if he wants to get checked then why not....

Marriage: What is the point, joseph abraham, dr joseph
joseph abraham, dr joseph, eye contact: Is the answer spending less time with his people? Yes!. Develop a new social circle which both you and your boyfriend feel comfortable with. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Relationship with Co-worker, heart to heart talk, budgeting money
heart to heart talk, budgeting money, heart to heart: Hi Lesli~ He may not agree with your sentiments or feelings, but he should at least respect where you re coming from. And try to understand why you have such a problem with this. Ask him how would he feel if you were in the same situation as he, how would...

Marriage: separated, please help, guardian angel, measure of time
guardian angel, measure of time, true goal: Hi Chris, Well done. If she is attending, then it shows that she very much cares. Don t take anything for granted. She is looking out for the children, for you and for herself and most likely in that order. Keep doing what you are doing and things will...

Marriage: do I stay or leave, marriage work, firm believer
marriage work, firm believer, ppl: Hi Shannan~ I m a firm believer in doing all that you can do to make a marriage work. However, at the same time, I don t think it s either right or fair to stay in a marriage where you truly don t passionately love your partner and you can t picture not...

Marriage: Toil & Trouble!, passionate man, having a beer
passionate man, having a beer, binges: Sara, Marriage is a long term reciprocal relationship and therefore any one’s Mood or drinking behavior should be taken as the couple’s mutual output. Something in the relationship triggered the behavior. Blaming bad genes or bad family background...

Marriage: Toil & Trouble, passionate man, having a beer
passionate man, having a beer, binges: Sara, Marriage is a long term reciprocal relationship and therefore any one’s Mood or drinking behavior should be taken as the couple’s mutual output. Something in the relationship triggered the behavior. Blaming bad genes or bad family background...

Marriage: Abusive Spouse? Raging? Drinking?, slamming doors, abusive spouse
slamming doors, abusive spouse, white wine: Dennis, I do understand your pessimistic mood; depression, however, is not the only choice. Any addiction is a problem that has many explanations, theories and treatment approaches. Mine is that everything relates to relationship: either to the yourself...

Marriage: Anger Management., marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, tolerance level: Ann, There is no ‘Cook Book’ answer or Quick Fix type of a respond to your current question. There are three major ‘learning and change’ missions for you both: 1. Your husband should assess and change many of his perceptions, habits, culture and...

Marriage: advice, listner, fake names
listner, fake names, personal things: Hi LEe, If you have expressed to your husband that this is bothering you, then it is his duty as your husband to stop the activity, simple as that. If he needs to have a woman friend, then he can invite her to your home and have her introduce herself...

Marriage: advice, listner, fake names
listner, fake names, personal things: Lee, Any affairs of married people is a situation that has many explanations, theories and treatment approaches. Mine is that everything relates to relationship: either to yourself, or to your significant other(s). This is the underlying basic foundation....

Marriage: Cancer and Adultery, 3rd degree burns, sexual intercourse
3rd degree burns, sexual intercourse, divorce papers: Hi Pam, I am so sorry about the cancer and all the trouble you have had. This has been a hard trial for you... This is a very common scenario that I hear from women who have had illnesses and especially long-term problems. I would say that the majority...

Marriage: Confused, small town girl, family background
small town girl, family background, doing the right thing: Hi Tish~ Maybe he s just not marriage material. He clearly had his priorities all wrong back then. And, yes, you are totally right, the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. It s likely he s go right back to how he behaved before once it...

Marriage: confused!, marriage
marriage: Hi Tish, People certainly can change. The biggest changes come when the person allows God to work in their hearts. I think the most important thing you should consider in taking him back is this: Has he proven to you, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that...

Marriage: so confused, marriage counseling, calling me names
marriage counseling, calling me names, different life: I cannot provide professional opinion based on 1/2 a page. A good discussion is needed; it may take 2-3 sessions (by phone). See my site for a few case summaries. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Divorce, stage 4 cancer, terminal illnesses
stage 4 cancer, terminal illnesses, insurance reasons: Hi Leah~ I did all kinds of research on the internet pertaining to what you ve asked, and I can find any reputable resources to confirm nor deny this claim (regarding not being able to divorce due to terminal illness of a spouse). I would suggest that...

Marriage: dealing with a violent stepson, stepson, nice things
stepson, nice things, tantrums: Jessica, The first thing you have to do is to make your husband realize what is happening. If the child does not act up when his father is around then video tape it and show him. The kids will do it and you will at least have the proof. The kids does not...

Marriage: escort service women, university in the philippines, far eastern university
university in the philippines, far eastern university, joseph abraham: 1. as a practitioner of psychology are you aware of Escort service? Yes 2. how do you find Escort Service womens? Sometimes trubled, sometimes very uniqe 3. what do you think an Escort Service feel when doing this kind of job? Sometimes with low self...

Marriage: Immature wife, person change, mentors
Marriage: Immature wife, person change, mentors

Marriage: Help me understand please, sex with my wife, male friends
sex with my wife, male friends, female friend: Larry, Any affairs of married people is a situation that has many explanations, theories and treatment approaches. Mine is that everything relates to relationship: either to yourself, or to your significant other(s). This is the underlying basic foundation....

Marriage: can there be happiness after the nuptials, happy marriage, rare occasions
happy marriage, rare occasions, nuptials: Hi Sandra~ I think to a certain extent what you re feeling, thinking and experiencing are pretty normal and typical for a person who s been through what you ve been through in life. My parents divorced when I was just 7 yrs old. My father was an alcoholic...

Marriage: Immature wife, dependent personality, emotional knowledge
dependent personality, emotional knowledge, adult conversation: Hi DT, Oh boy......this is a toughie. Your message made me smile, because I can only imagine the difficulty you may be having in carrying on an adult conversation. It seems that you have evolve to the point where you understand things a bit better...

Marriage: MARRIAGE, homemade chili, poor judgement
homemade chili, poor judgement, pastor kim: Hi Lynn, Yes, poor judgment on his part, most definitely! And I think you are a little angry and jealous or you would not have written! Guys who are 45 want to think that they are still good looking and appreciated, so keep your eyes peeled for anything...

Marriage: Marriage., fundamental basis, terrible thing
fundamental basis, terrible thing, doubts: I have pasted my past answer for you to read again as per your request. Yes, I have doubted my love for my wife once and again in the beginning, when I was not sure about what the future would hold. It passed as the relationship got more and more...

Marriage: Marriage., personal emotions, fear of the unknown
personal emotions, fear of the unknown, insecurity: Hi Cgllr, Do things that make you both happy.........one day something for him, the other day something for you. At some point you will find things that you both enjoy and that s where things start coming together. Communicate. Communicate a lot about...

Marriage: Marriage?, distinct individuals, fundamental problem
distinct individuals, fundamental problem, mutual friend: Hi again, I sure hope that this is helping you at some point because at this point, you are my most responded-to person. How you do know it is love? What is your definition of love to be exact? You will feel it. You mentioned all the reasons in...

Marriage: Marriage, marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, professional assessment: Kim, Much more info is needed; this is the professional assessment process (takes 1-3 sessions). So at this point, I do not have too much to say except a strong advice to stop stay silent. Your situation does not have a ‘Cook Book’ answer or Quick Fix...

Marriage: Marriage., infactuation, insecurity
infactuation, insecurity, upbringing: Hi Again, I won t get mad at all. You have to understand that I do this as a service to try to help people if I can. If my words were not of value to you, then I can only hope that they were at least deemed sincere and intended to assist. If you were...

Marriage: Marriage., beauty is in the eye of the beholder, eye of the beholder
beauty is in the eye of the beholder, eye of the beholder, none of my business: Hi, I enjoy your questions, but you do have to consider that I need time to answer questions from other people as well. I hope you understand. At 13, you have to admit that it may be a long time before you are in a marriage , requiring assistance for...

Marriage: Marriage and parental consent, full custody, parental consent
full custody, parental consent, state laws: Hi You~ I believe that as long as one parent is willing to give his/her consent to marry, then that s all the court needs in order to approve the marriage between one or two minors. You could also have the mother (since she s more accepting of you) check...

Marriage: Marriage / Reconciliation, marriage reconciliation, soccer school
marriage reconciliation, soccer school, goodbye to friends: Hi Jane, Thank you for elaborating with regards to the emotions involved. Continue to find what you need before you commit. There are ways of finding out from a person what the real important factors are. One giveaway is whether a person listens well...

Marriage: Menopause, pre menopause symptoms, symptoms of menopause
pre menopause symptoms, symptoms of menopause, dr abraham: John, I would not tie everything to symptoms of menopause. It is my impresion that you both need a professional help here, since due to your lifesyle (work-living situation) your relationship issues are complex and not too simple to solve. There...

Marriage: Mother-In-Law!, provocative clothing, relative age
provocative clothing, relative age, future children: Sandy, The responsibility to solve the issue belongs first to your husband and only thereafter to you. Unfortunately, I cannot meet your expectation for a ‘Cook Book’ answer or Quick Fix type of a reply that will tell you how to handle the situation....

Marriage: Pre-marital Lies Revealed, marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, false allegations: Jim, Yes, a counselor and therapy can help you. Your situation needs a counseling process. Find a local marriage counselor or use my online phone counseling (see my site for a few case summaries). There is no Quick Fix type of a respond to your current...

Marriage: My partner does not want to get married against her parents wishes to me, ups and downs, patience
ups and downs, patience, long distance: Hi Sums, I m afraid I can t be of much help here, as my knowledge pertains more to the marriage itself and its ups and downs. I can only say that where you come from, marriage is viewed in a very different manner than it is here, and parents have a lot...

Marriage: Question., question question, rough times
question question, rough times, good qualities: Hi, I am beginning to wonder whether you are playing a trick on me. I think we have been over the material from a few angles already. I m not sure what you are looking for from me. I have seen you write an enormous amount of material that would make...

Marriage: Running his own business with lots of revolving debt, stay at home mom, new boss
stay at home mom, new boss, workstyle: Hi Cindi, I feel very saddened by what I read. Your husband claims that you know nothing about running a business, yet you are the one who sees the truth about his business . Something doesn t make sense to me, and I say this because I was in business...

Marriage: What does this really mean?, marriage without sex, angelina jolie
marriage without sex, angelina jolie, favorite band: You gave me a nice long book to read thanks. This sounds like a case of what if. It was a very long case of what if but that is what it sounds like to me. You have to look at marriage as a life long commitment. You can not look at it as there is some kind...

Marriage: Sorry!!!!!, marriage problems, kindest thing
marriage problems, kindest thing, young lady: Young lady, Your apology is readily accepted. Although it may not have been the kindest thing to do to take my time volunteered to help with marriage problems by inventing a problem and persisting as you did. You already knew that, recognized it and found...

Marriage: sexless marriage, joseph abraham, getting a divorce
joseph abraham, getting a divorce, little sex: There are issues that are best resolved by a peaceful and friendly divorce. Every end road is a beginning of a new avenue. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com ...

Marriage: How to solve the trouble in my relationship, marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, month old baby: Nabs, Yes, you should talk to your husband. And also yes , you should find a local marriage counselor or use my online phone counseling (see my site for a few relevant case summaries and articles). Your situation does not have a ‘Cook Book’ answer...

Marriage: soulmate....., meaning of marriage, pastor kim
meaning of marriage, pastor kim, pastoral counseling: Hi Dasy, I really don t believe too much in the term soulmates . God would prefer for us to remain with one person for life, but in many circumstances this is not possible and He will bring us another partner to love. To answer your other questions,...

Marriage: supporting efforts, acts of rage, violent behavior
acts of rage, violent behavior, violent acts: Hi Isabell~ It s very crucial that your husband gets on board with you and you both agree to some sort of punishment for when your son acts out and becomes violent with you. You didn t mention how old your son was, but I m assume he s not a teenager yet....

Marriage: What does this truly mean?, marriage without sex, angelina jolie
marriage without sex, angelina jolie, favorite band: Hi CGLLR, Well, I would probably read it over again and tell you that you are being somewhat insecure and making your life more complicated than it needs to be, because only you can know if you married for the right reasons. I think I would also tell...

Marriage: Unable to compromise, highschool sweethearts, household bills
highschool sweethearts, household bills, different story: Hi Kellie~ With two failed marriages that can certainly be enough to not want to go through all that again, so I can kinda see and understand where he s coming from on this. HOWEVER (and that s a big however), it s not fair to you, as you already stated,...

Marriage: Unhappy marriage, marriage counselor, dr abraham
marriage counselor, dr abraham, marriage problems: Yes James, you are right. Psychology has nothing to do with guessing. Gathering information is the name of the game. Assessing the situation is the next step. Only thereafter you may expact the action plan to come. Your situation needs a counseling process....

Marriage: How to understand marriage, Dr. dan, relationship coach
Dr. dan, relationship coach, sex: Dear Luth, Good question Luth! In fact this is one that I spoke for hours on with our good friend Guru Singh, he s a Sikh Guru, very wise, and very knowledgeable. Sex and marriage is a subject that Westerners truly don t get. What we learn and what...

Marriage: video games affecting marriage, necessary compromises, moments of clarity
necessary compromises, moments of clarity, infinite sadness: Angela, I would have suggested that you seek some marriage counseling for the abuse of the games. He may think that as long as he makes money that he can do what he wants. I can understand how you feel about the games. I know that when my kids were that...

Marriage: IS THERE A WAY TO STAY OR SHOULD I LEAVE, disability checks, unhappy marriages
disability checks, unhappy marriages, local church: Hi Joan, I honestly don t know how you have stayed this long. I am so sorry that this marriage wasn t all it could have been. Have you ever gone to counseling together? At this point, the stress you say you are having will take its toll on you. Being...

Marriage: i want out, he doesnt, i do not love him like a wife should love her husband., drill session, couples therapy
drill session, couples therapy, childhood experiences: Hi Ana, You have seen a therapist for two years and are still going? I d say it s time to switch counselors! You should be getting answers and not have to rely on a counselor for that long. I think you owe your marriage another try and my suggestions...

Marriage: Can my wife ever overcome the turmoil I caused?, first nine months, getting a divorce
first nine months, getting a divorce, work construction: Hi Jon~ There is a 50-50 chance that it could go either way from here on out. It might be good to give her her space right now. This way she can decide what to do from there on out. The problem here at hand is that she s obviously very concerned and...

Marriage: too young?, time college student, bride of christ
time college student, bride of christ, utmost respect: Victoria, I do think that even 20 is a bit young to get married. If you believe that this is the one then you can wait. He being 27 will be more anxious to get married because he is looking at being much older when his kids are young. If you do not want...

Marriage: too young?, marriage
marriage: Hi Victoria, Is this man a good man? Does he treat you with love and respect? Has he ever verbally or physically abused you? Will he be a good provider and father? If this man is a blessing to you and you feel he is the one, then I don t see any problem...

Marriage: alchahol, alchahol, pastor kim
alchahol, pastor kim, addiction problem: Mike, I don t think you have a control problem. You are concerned about your wife and rightfully so. If she is getting drunk and has children that she is responsible for, this is a big no no. She should NEVER be drunk. It s irresponsible. Just recently...

Marriage: Should I ask?, lexus gs 450, joseph abraham
lexus gs 450, joseph abraham, 2006 lexus gs: Depart. Move on. If you feel lost, search for a local counseling service or take a look at my site and determine if you do want to peruse. You may also look at my articles too at: http://dr-jo-consulting.blogspot.com Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham...

Marriage: confused, joseph abraham, emotional affairs
joseph abraham, emotional affairs, early marriage: There is no generic and simple / one time remedy answer for your issue(s). Every marriage is unique and therefore a professional advice should be based on familiarity with your (both of you) backgrounds and personalities. Such a sad story in such an early...

Marriage: ending my marriage, nine years, reconciliation
nine years, reconciliation, alot of people: Hi Katherine~ You need to be up front and brutally honest with him. You don t have to be mean and disrespectful to him when you tell him the truth. He deserves to hear how you feel about him and the marriage. You should tell him something like: John,...

Marriage: equality in marraige, childcare provider, family meeting
childcare provider, family meeting, good wife: Every relationship is the creation of the two. His dominance is also a result of your on-going acceptance of it along the years. A professional advice about re-starting your dialog, communication and mutual lifestyle should be based on my familiarity with...

Marriage: equality in marraige, puppet masters, refreshing sense
Marriage: equality in marraige, puppet masters, refreshing sense, grace of god

Marriage: Husband Says He Doesn't Know What He Wants, mths, having sex
mths, having sex, hasn: Hi Nikki~ The drop dead deal breaker that would seal the deal for me would be him not having contact or anything to do with my son, if I were in your situation. He knew that when he went into this relationship and then marriage with you that it was a package...

Marriage: Husband and wife fights, financial commitments, bread winner
financial commitments, bread winner, loose control: Preethy, First, please do not expect that this e-mail or any one time e-mail would provide a simple and quick remedy for your pain... I have no quick fix for you. Every marriage is unique and therefore a professional advice should take in account not...

Marriage: Kindly advice, intelligent children, thts
intelligent children, thts, fashion model: Hi Jyotsana, My beautiful younger sister who left home at 18 to go to London England to be a fashion model met a young man there about a year into her stay. He was from Syria, and without wishing to elaborate too much on his looks, suffice it to say...

Marriage: Loveless Marriage, parent teacher organization, loveless marriage
parent teacher organization, loveless marriage, marriage counseling: Hi Paul, Thanks for writing. It sure does sound like your marriage is just about dead, and that s a terrible feeling. You mention that your wife is happy, but I seriously doubt that she is. My guess is that for whatever reason, she is not about to reveal...

Marriage: lack of intamcy, sexual shyness
sexual shyness: Hi Dennis, Thanks for writing and hello to you! What I know about people is that the only thing we can change is ourselves. What I am hearing you saying is that you have an idea in your head about what your relationship might be, and you d like to know...

Marriage: Marriage, speaking part, monetary value
speaking part, monetary value, fiance: Hi Carmulita~ That information from your friends is incorrect. Generally speaking anything that you enter into the marriage with (meaning if you had a house and a car prior to marriage) is strictly yours. There are laws in every state to protect people...

Marriage: Marriage, fiance pressure
fiance pressure: Hi Mathew, First, thank you for serving in our armed forces. My son is a Marine now deployed in Asia, and I know how tough it can be on a family as well as on the person who is serving. I honor you and your service, and really appreciated you saying that...

Marriage: Marriage, worst case scenario, county court house
worst case scenario, county court house, united states marine: Hi Eli~ There are some states (but very few) that actually permit a 16 yo to marry. In other states you have to have at least one parental or a legal guardian s consent of the minor for marriage. Otherwise, if you were to run off an elope it would be...

Marriage: Marrying an older women, way to india, biological sense
way to india, biological sense, i don t care: Dear SD, Hello to you all the way to India! I am sorry you are having difficulties. The Indian culture is very different from how the American culture is when it comes to questions like yours. In America, I would tell you what difference does it make...

Marriage: Mate, joseph abraham, breakthrough ideas
joseph abraham, breakthrough ideas, dr joseph: Many times a third party, especially professional, can view alternatives and suggest breakthrough ideas. Look therefore for a local counseling resource or take a look at my site and determine if you do want to peruse. I assume that 2-3 sessions would...

Marriage: I'm lost, can you please help me?, prescription pain killers, binge drinking
prescription pain killers, binge drinking, smoke marijuana: Hi Jennifer, Thank you for taking the time to explain some details about the relationship. I read the information over a few times before deciding that I would make a strong effort at giving you some much needed advice on your manner of seeing things....

Marriage: I'm tired, lack of sexual desire, husband doesn't initiate sex
lack of sexual desire, husband doesn't initiate sex: Hi Rhonda, I am sorry you are having a bad time in your relationship. You don t give me very many details. Are you married? Have you talked to him about the sex issue? If you have not, then I would definitely go to him and say something like, Honey,...

Marriage: marriage, muslim girl, muslim country
muslim girl, muslim country, prestigious job: Hi Loli~ I m from a completely different culture than where you are. It s hard to not really get to know someone if you can t date them or be friends with them first before you jump into a relationship or even marriage. Being friends is what I ve found...

Marriage: marriage torn by ciggrettes, second hand smoke, personality changes
second hand smoke, personality changes, personal hell: Hi Katie G~ He s putting poison in his body and exposing you and your unborn baby to it too. He s not only compromising his health but that of your baby and you too. Second hand smoke kills just as many ppl who smoke each year. It s deadly period. It...

Marriage: marrige, ungrateful person, hi tim
ungrateful person, hi tim, personal attack: Hi Tim~ Do not listen to her and take what she says personally. Any woman would be envious of what you do for your wife, b/c there aren t enough men to step up to the plate and be a real man like you truly are. If I were you I d honestly be insulted by...

Marriage: i need advice, marriage life, dear doctor
marriage life, dear doctor, language barrier: Hi Sona, I know you tried your best, but the language barrier makes it very difficult for me to understand this question. What I do understand is that you cannot control your moods or yourself, and this is a much more difficult issue that can be answered...

Marriage: Problem Marriage., second marriage, home cooked meal
second marriage, home cooked meal, first move: Hi Sally, I am sorry for the distress you are feeling. Is there any reason you have not gone for counseling for yourself, or for your marriage? I really think this would be a good idea. Keeping all of this inside is not going to do you any good, and it...

Marriage: Saving marriage, effects of war, history of depression
effects of war, history of depression, abuse drug: Hi James, I am so sorry for what you are going through. It is scary and I completely understand your desire to do something to fix the situation, but this is a tough, tough scenario. I don t want to scare you further, but it sounds to me like your wife...

Marriage: seperation, thoughts and feelings, simplest things
thoughts and feelings, simplest things, inner strength: Hi Jenny~ All of these thoughts and feelings that you re going through are normal and to be expected. You, of course, know that it s never okay, period, for someone to put their hands on you in any fashion whatsoever! You do not deserve to be treated...

Marriage: short tempered husband, control freak, ambitious person
control freak, ambitious person, character flaw: Hi Jasmine, I m not quite sure what the customs are in your side of the world, but here in Canada, I am not able to decide anything about my wife s career as it is not I who is doing her work, nor was it I who decided to do the schooling to get her degree....

Marriage: Is it silly?, Wife Swap, child rearing
Wife Swap, child rearing: Hi Becky, Thanks for writing. I have seen Wife Swap and it is fascinating how they take two families that are polar opposites and put them in each other s home. I like the show because each family usually comes a little more toward the center after being...

Marriage: I can't get an erection with my wife, saturday mornings, urologist
saturday mornings, urologist, strong erection: Hi Mark, Thanks for writing. I didn t write sooner as your question is not an easy one. The first thing you must do is to get a physical check up and find out if there could be any reason for this -- you might visit a urologist. Please be honest with him...

Marriage: I can't get an erection with my wife, physiological nature, saturday mornings
physiological nature, saturday mornings, strong erection: Indeed it seems that the issue is of psychological, not physiological nature. There is however no generic and simple / one time remedy answer. Every relationship is unique and therefore a professional advice should be based on familiarity with your (both of...

Marriage: trust issues, long term relationship, mean girl
long term relationship, mean girl, stomache: Hi Danielle, I read your message twice. My suggestion will be simple and clear and my reasoning as well. He chose to lie to you, and not to her. He chose her friendship over your love. It is time for you to move on. If he did this to you without...

Marriage: wifes affair, computer room, legal help
computer room, legal help, best interest: Hi Rod~ I don t know about Canadian laws, but in the US (which is where I m from, and I d assume Canadian laws are a little similar) you can t kick your spouse out of the home if you re legally married. She has a legal right to be there just as much as...

Marriage: What should i do about the woman i want to be with?, good person, marriage
good person, marriage, girls: Hi Eric~ It seems that she does not return the feelings you have for her. She sees you as more of a friend and not a love interest. To top it off this woman is married and has been with her BF and now husband for 10 yrs. You can t make assumptions that...

Marriage: what can i do, beating a dead horse, joseph abraham
beating a dead horse, joseph abraham, professional assessment: There is no simple / one time remedy answers. A professional what to do advice depends on the background, so both sides need to be interviewed. You indeed need a professional assessment (2-4 sessions). Look for a local resource (what about the military...

Marriage: !!, abuse marriage, unhappy marriage
abuse marriage, unhappy marriage, bipolar spouse: Stacy, Thanks for writing. The answer to this question is an easy one: Your husband is abusive, a substance abuser, suffers from a variety of mental disorders, hangs out with losers and makes inappropriate decisions, doesn t take responsibility for his...

Marriage: where to from here, head and heart, priorty
head and heart, priorty, san antonio texas: Hi Leigh, Greetings to you down in Australia -- all the way from San Antonio, Texas. I am sorry that you are in this frustrating and sad marital situation. Your husband sure has taken advantage of the stockpile of goodwill he has with you ... the question...

Marriage: Young married couple, sexless marriage
sexless marriage: Hello my dear Giselle, I am really sorry you are having relationship issues in your young marriage. This is supposed to be a time of passion and exploring, NOT ignoring! And I am sure that your husband, as young as he is, is not comfortable discussing what...

Marriage: young married couple, joseph abraham, honeymoon phase
joseph abraham, honeymoon phase, mutual pleasure: Gizela, Indeed very painful! Unfortunately, I have no generic and simple answer for your issue(s). Every relationship is unique and therefore a professional advice about re-starting your passion dialog and mutual pleasure should be based on my familiarity...

Marriage: Very confused about the state of my marriage, heart to heart talk, marriage counseling
heart to heart talk, marriage counseling, marriage work: Hi Bob~ I m a firm believer in doing everything within your power to make a marriage work. So that s what you should at least attempt to do. The problem that I see in most marriages is a lack of communication and how one expresses themselves to their...

Marriage: Dealing with an insecure husband, ad nauseum, romantic feelings
ad nauseum, romantic feelings, male friend: Kimberly, There is no generic and simple / one time answer for your issue(s). The entire situation is too complex for one or two comments. Actually, a professional advice or remark should be based on familiarity with your (both of you) backgrounds and...

Marriage: My daughter is having an affair with her grandfather... and I don't know how to cope with this., quiet drink, respectful manner
quiet drink, respectful manner, father figure: Hi Joanne~ What they are doing is called incest and yes it s illegal. I don t know what the legal age of consent is in the UK, but in most states here in the US (where I m from) it s 17 and 18 (the latter for sure). In some states the parents can press...

Marriage: My daughter ran off with her husband's father and is now trying for a baby with him., having an affair, business trip
having an affair, business trip, betrayal: Hi Jennifer~ She made it your business when she invited you into the conversation to begin with. You re right you can t make her stop having the affair with this man. What you can do though is give her an ultimatum; that she tell her husband and face...

Marriage: diferent age, problem people at work, latin lady
problem people at work, latin lady, coworker: Hi Elisa~ You left your old BF for a very good reason. He s been dishonest with you and lying to you about him seeing/living with this other woman that he s clearly still involved with. That s why you left him for a reason, and he s your ex-BF for a reason...

Marriage: divorce., dysfunctional patterns, qualitys
dysfunctional patterns, qualitys, profound change: Hi Jason, Thanks for writing. I can really tell that you want to find a way -- almost any way -- to save your marriage. I feel for you and what you are going through. First, I appreciate that you admit that you have opportunities to save your marriage...

Marriage: divorce, qualitys, permanent change
qualitys, permanent change, mths: Hi Jason~ If she s already made up her mind, you can t necessarily make her change it if she s determined to divorce you. You might have to learn to come to terms with that very real possibility. Whoever told you to make those changes for yourself, they...

Marriage: i don't know what to do..., short temper, having children
short temper, having children, doing the right thing: Hi Ashley~ Sometimes a person marries for the wrong reasons and it can end up coming back to haunt them. Me, for example, I dated my now-ex-husband when we were 19 (I knew him since grade school), got married when we were 20 and had our first child (planned)...

Marriage: Exhausted raising my husband, lazy husband, controling spouse
lazy husband, controling spouse: Hi Dawn, Thanks for writing. I am sorry that you are so unhappy in your marriage. I do think marriage counseling is a wise idea ... I imagine that if you both had physical injuries you would find the time to go to a doctor to help you feel better and get...

Marriage: Exhausted raising my husband, menu plan, golf tournaments
Marriage: Exhausted raising my husband, menu plan, golf tournaments, playing golf

Marriage: relations, marriage partners, emotional pain
Marriage: relations, marriage partners, emotional pain, self awareness

Marriage: which girl will be suitable for my marriage, likes dislikes, good personality
likes dislikes, good personality, personalities: Hi Sunny~ You should look for someone that has similar qualities like you. Someone who can relate to you and even bring out the best in you. If you date around and date different women with different personalities, go with someone that you feel comfortable...

Marriage: Do all guys do that..???, heart to heart talk, cute babies
heart to heart talk, cute babies, personal feelings: Hi Daria~ I have to say that baby talk and all the compliments he s been giving you are a good sign. However, you need to sit down and have a serious heart to heart talk with him. He needs to know exactly how this is affecting you and what you re willing...

Marriage: Husband's behavior change - does it mean he's on his way out the door?, negative attributes, marriage counseling
negative attributes, marriage counseling, clean slate: Rachel, Your description is too general and describes the end result but not the root causes; unhappiness during marriage is not a born but adopted charecteristic. There is therefore no generic and simple / one time remedy answer for your issue(s). ...

Marriage: Husband ranting about everything... no matter where we are or what we do!, heart to heart talk, marriage changes
heart to heart talk, marriage changes, mum and dad: Hi Laura~ A person changes after they get married, don t ask me why that happens, but it s so true! It can be for the better or worse, depends totally on the person and how exactly marriage changes them. Maybe he s upset about something and you just don...

Marriage: Husband wants out for no apparent reason..., having an affair with a married man, communication ends
having an affair with a married man, communication ends, culture clash: Hi Alexandra~ Wow! I can see you have a huge dilemma here on your hands. That s just awful that any counselor would tell you to blank him more and he ll love you and be happier. That s just a very rude, inappropriate and very inconsiderate response that...

Marriage: My husband, abuse marriage, unhappy marriage
abuse marriage, unhappy marriage, separation: Hi Brenda, Poor dear. Yes, you absolutely positively are being abused. Your son has learned how to do this from his father and others, and he will be just like his dad if he doesn t get help. I know you are broke but if you call your local battered woman...

Marriage: My husband has become judgmental, and our son has too..., dawn till dusk, work colleague
dawn till dusk, work colleague, personality change: Hi Kate~ That s truly awful that his attitude is crappy and disrespectful like that, not to mention it s very racist. It s probably a good thing that you don t meet these new friends. People who act like that aren t any friends at all. You have every...

Marriage: My husband claims a picture of him on a dating site is a set-up..., benefit of doubt, running photos
benefit of doubt, running photos, stranger things: Hi Karla~ I m a little bit skeptical on his excuse that he knows nothing about this and he s not the one who s not posting on this dating site to begin with. I ve seen and heard way stranger things than this though. First off you need to ask him who and...

Marriage: should i let my husband control me, controlling husband, money issues
controlling husband, money issues, deceipt: Hi Lisa, Poor dear. You have broken your husband s trust -- similar to having an affair, you did something to breach his trust, so the first order of the day is to vehemently accept responsibility for your errors and to promise never to do it again -- then...

Marriage: My husband's email affair... he's behaving oddly, sexual addiction
sexual addiction: HI Judith, Thanks for writing. This is not a great way to start a marriage off, is it? You have my deepest sympathy for what you are going through. Well, I would say that your marriage is in severe trouble. This kind of behavior is unacceptable and disrespectful,...

Marriage: My husband's email affair... odd behaviour, marriage material, error in judgment
marriage material, error in judgment, odd behaviour: Hi Judith, Six weeks is all it took, eh? Your husband is correct in that he can do whatever he wants. So, taking that into consideration, it also means that you could do whatever you want as well. Ask him how he feels with the suggestion that you will...

Marriage: My husband's odd behaviour with our son-in-law..., jon doe, swanky hotel
jon doe, swanky hotel, odd behaviour: Hi Sally~ My goodness, you have every right to be stressed out and very concerned. You need to print out that email (if you still have access to it) and show it to your daughter. She has a right to know what her husband is up to with your husband. And...

Marriage: My husband's ranting about everything, no matter where we are or what we do..., something chemical, severe depression
something chemical, severe depression, mum and dad: Hi Laura, The reason I haven t written you earlier is that your question is a complicated one. The more I think about it, the more I conclude that something chemical is going on with your husband, and he should have a physical check up to see what s going...

Marriage: My husband and son are in this cult and it's worrying me..., george clooney, y fronts
george clooney, y fronts, typical question: Hi Katherine~ Wow! I can t even begin to imagine what you re going through right now. This certainly isn t a typical question/problem I ve ever dealt with before. It s definitely a first and a unique one at that. I would have a hard time taking him and...

Marriage: My husband spends too much time with a close male friend and I don't know what to do..., underwear photos, gay affair
underwear photos, gay affair, trip to spain: Hi Dawn, I am sorry for what you are going through. It certainly sounds like your husband is having a gay affair, but apparently he has so much shame about his homosexual side that he will lie, lie, lie about it. You certainly deserve answers. If I were...

Marriage: My husband spends too much time with a close male friend..., underwear photos, suspicious behaviour
underwear photos, suspicious behaviour, male friend: Hi Dawn, Invite Jeremy for dinner and ask him to bring his girlfriend (if he has one, but I doubt it), and then talk with them both at dinner about your concerns. If your husband refuses, then it is clear what is happening here. I m leaning on the same...

Marriage: My husband spends too much time with a male friend who I've never met and he claims is a very close friend... and I'm not sure what to do., duck quacks, gut instincts
duck quacks, gut instincts, underwear photos: Hi Dawn~ If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, then it s a duck. If his behavior is odd and unexplainable and you re beginning to think he s gay, then trust your gut instincts. Gut instincts are there for a reason and that s to tell us when something...

Marriage: My husband suddenly decided to become a down-and-out and I don't know why..., british time, homeless person
british time, homeless person, emotional issues: Hi Jennifer~ Wow! He just up and suddenly w/o warning decided to leave everything behind and go live like a homeless person?! I can t grasp why someone would want to do that and to go to such as extreme. My first reaction is that he has some mental issues...

Marriage: My husband thinks he has erectile dysfunction..., fragile egos, obsessive behavior
fragile egos, obsessive behavior, distorted view: Hi Suzanne~ It seems that he has a very distorted view of his penis size. For most men the size of their penis determines their masculinity and that somehow defines their manhood and it means everything to them. Men have very fragile egos but they usually...

Marriage: My husband WANTS another man to make me pregnant!!, feminine wiles, cheating men
feminine wiles, cheating men, deepest sympathies: Dear Callie, I thought I had heard everything until I read your letter. You have my deepest sympathies for having to even listen to your husband s request. So, you ask what would I do in your situation? I would tell my husband, Hell no! It is clear...

Marriage: My husband WANTS another man to make me pregnant!!, feminine wiles, having sex with another man
feminine wiles, having sex with another man, cheating men: Hi Callie~ Well, I can definitely see why you would have a huge problem with this very scenario! For one this isn t normal and typical behavior of a man. Secondly, he might be setting you up or he s got a very demented fetish for you having sex with another...

Marriage: My husband does not want sex..., pleasurable act, inner demons
pleasurable act, inner demons, sexual acts: Hi Lynsey~ That s horrible that your husband had to endure something so traumatic with his father. I m sure it s very hard and even embarrassing for him to talk about with you and anyone else. I can understand and totally respect that he s very hesitant...

Marriage: joint residential custody, residential custody, custody visitation
residential custody, custody visitation, finalization: Hi Lindsey~ Typically the judge makes a decision in the divorce if the parties can t decide for themselves and they are fighting over it. As long as the parties are in agreement then they can get what they ask for whatever that may be; custody, visitation,...

Marriage: lack of communication?, silent treatment, lack of communication
silent treatment, lack of communication, withdrawl: Hi Giselle, You certainly have my sympathy for what you are going through. Yes, I guess the cousin would be considered a perpetrator legally. How that incident affected your husband only he could say for sure. In some people it would be devastating and...

Marriage: not in love, physical relationship, sexual relationship
physical relationship, sexual relationship, apetite: Hi Pollyanna~ Maybe you re idea of love isn t really love with these so called bad boys, maybe it s just lust, and you don t really know love b/c you haven t truly experienced it to begin with? Just a thought and theory I have on situations like yours....

Marriage: Marriage, marriage counselor, family gatherings
marriage counselor, family gatherings, bitter divorce: Hi Elaine, Thanks for writing. It sounds like you re having serious problems in your marriage, and I feel badly for you. You have every right to feel like you do. Your husband should be validating how you feel, and make your feelings about this situation...

Marriage: Marriage, skanky women, sexual urges
skanky women, sexual urges, afraid of sex: Chris, ...im in no rush. like i said i didnt marry her for the sex... You are very wrong; the issue should be solved ASAP not as your ugent problem but as yours (both of you). Sex is as important to the female as to the male. Besides this, the other...

Marriage: Marriage, playing video games, stupid mistakes
playing video games, stupid mistakes, broken heart: Hi Charlotte, I am sorry you are feeling so low. In answer to your question, I do think you need professional help, and this is nothing to be ashamed of. Professional help is what got me on my feet and in the right direction over 20 years ago. It saved...

Marriage: making marriage work, mamas boy, marriage work
mamas boy, marriage work, high paying job: Hi Shae, Your situation is very sad and I am sorry that you are in experiencing it. I hope you don t mind brutal honesty, because your husband sounds like a selfish loser. While reading your letter I kept asking myself, Why did she marry this jerk...

Marriage: marriage, skanky women, sexual urges
skanky women, sexual urges, afraid of sex: Hi Chris, I think that you are going about it the right way. I would simply ease into it and see how she feels about it, without necessarily sitting down to discuss it. There must be times where you cuddle and kiss, and simply hold each other tight. ...

Marriage: marriage, skanky women, sexual urges
skanky women, sexual urges, afraid of sex: Hi Chris~ That s very noble and respectable of you, not many men could do this and be as patient as you can/are. I would suggest that she receive some serious individual counseling to cope and deal with what happened with her in the rape. That s if she...

Marriage: marriage, fortune teller, finding a date
fortune teller, finding a date, date of birth: Hi Kush, I m sorry but I am not a fortune teller. Only you can know when the time is suitable for your marriage. If you can manage to find support from her family first, I think that you will be closer to finding a date. Find out what is irking her family...

Marriage: marriage ending, typical teenage girl, room mates
typical teenage girl, room mates, daughter move: Hi Lynne~ Sometimes the hardest part is taking the first step and then actually going through with it. And that s all it takes to get your life back in order and to start living it and finally to be happy. That s what you ve done and be proud of yourself...

Marriage: marriage lost, joseph abraham, marriage therapy
joseph abraham, marriage therapy, sexual fantasies: I hope Max that you would accept that there is no generic and simple / one time remedy answer for your issue(s). Every relationship and sexual relationship is unique and therefore a professional advice should be based on the familiarity with your (both...

Marriage: In need of some advice, desperate need, fiance
desperate need, fiance, last saturday: James, This issue is too complicated to be solved by a few lines. There is no generic and simple / one time remedy answer for your issue(s). Look for a local counseling resource or take a look at the case studies in my site and the sessions fees...

Marriage: In need of some advice, desperate need, fiance
desperate need, fiance, last saturday: Hi James, I m afraid you screwed up with great distinction. If you hadn t mentioned your age, I would have guessed it nonetheless. I don t think you will like my advice, but I ll take the time to share with you how I see this. You mention that you...

Marriage: In need of some advice, desperate need, fiance
desperate need, fiance, last saturday: James, Based on the story to tell, you are too immature to marry, and apparently your fiance knows it. She doesn t sound like a prize, either. I consider the canceled engagement a marital disaster and future divorce avoided. Thank God for that. Someone...

Marriage: i need help, ana sofia, dangerous game
ana sofia, dangerous game, weird feeling: Dear Ana, What a dangerous game you have played. So dangerous that now you are considering making a self-centered decision that will negatively affect many people in your life for years to come. And what for - love? Give me a break. My dear, I m going...

Marriage: newlyweds living in with her brother, wedding time, whe
wedding time, whe, grocery shopping: Hi Albert, NOW HERE IS MY QUESTION: ---is it healthy for our new married life together having to share our place with her brother once we get back from the honeymoon?--- I personally don t think so , unless it is understood that it is a very temporary...

Marriage: pedophilia, sick fantasies, naked teenagers
sick fantasies, naked teenagers, kwow: Hi Patty~ What he s doing it illegal and he will likely go to jail for. Porn that has minor children in it, should be reported to the police and ASAP. If he ll view porn of underage children on the internet and pass it around to other pedophiles then...

Marriage: Question, poor choices, marriage certificate
poor choices, marriage certificate, bad decisions: Hi Dianna~ I totally agree with you for many reasons. Most of the reasons being that when a person gets married young they are immature, and don t always know what they want, they can t make very good decisions (and see what the consequences for poor choices...

Marriage: relations, borderline personality disorder, untreated depression
borderline personality disorder, untreated depression, hello doctor: Hi Y, The reason I told you to go to the web site www.bpdcentral.com is so you could get all of your questions answered. I am not able to answer every question that you have. There are many books on the subject as well -- all are listed on the web site....

Marriage: School, ebb and flow, school loans
ebb and flow, school loans, financial debt: Hi Eva, Congrats on your education. I have gone that route as well, and have significant debt. If I waited to marry until I pay it off I will certainly be dead first. You don t say how much debt you have, but many of these loans are for 20 or 30 years....

Marriage: How to save my marriage, marriage counseling, how to save my marriage
marriage counseling, how to save my marriage, mths: Jason, There is no generic and simple / one time remedy answer that will either do a miracle regarding the self change that you want or save your marriage. You indeed need individual as well as marriage counseling; it may convince your wife to take a...

Marriage: I think my marriage is over, adult duties, adult matter
adult duties, adult matter, adult responsibilities: Hi Tracy~ If the UK is anything like the US (where I m from) you probably can t kick him out of the marital home. The only way you d be able to do that is through a court order forcing him to leave and find another place to reside. The reason being is...

Marriage: Wife does not want me joining any clubs / orgs, recovering from depression, air national guard
recovering from depression, air national guard, shift position: Pat, There is no generic and simple / one time remedy answer for your issue(s). Generally speaking, you are talking about your entire marriage / relationship. This requires much more than a few lines answer. Every marriage is unique and therefore a professional...

Marriage: We are doing well but now my husband decided we would move to Los Angeles and "make it big". How can I convince him that we should stay where we are now?, adults with autism, actors actresses
adults with autism, actors actresses, pipe dream: Hi Joanne~ He s living a pipe dream, very, very few people that go out to LA actually make it to show business that way. It takes YEARS to achieve what he thinks he can do overnight in. There are so many actors/actresses out there in the world right now,...

Marriage: What do I do about my wife's dad and his sexual attitude towards me?, mars bars, friday nights
mars bars, friday nights, 4 months: Hi Craig~ You really must tell your wife what s going on here, even if you don t think she ll believe you, that s a chance you must be willing to take. The point here is that he father s behavior and throwing himself at you constantly is getting rather...

Marriage: My wife wants a sex-change..., shivers down my spine, interest automobiles
shivers down my spine, interest automobiles, proper idea: First Greg, please do not expect that this e-mail would provide a simple and quick remedy for your pain... Every person is entitled to get his or her sexuality; it would be essential therefore for your wife to seek psychological counseling to discuss this...

Marriage: My wife wants a sex-change..., shivers down my spine, interest automobiles
shivers down my spine, interest automobiles, proper idea: Hi Greg, I m also not quite sure how to deal with this type of situation. I do sense that your wife seems very intent on having her way, and seems not very considerate with regards to what this will do to you and the children. the fact that she wishes...

Marriage: My wife wants a sex-change..., shivers down my spine, interest automobiles
shivers down my spine, interest automobiles, proper idea: Hi Greg~ Well, I can understand what a shock this was to you when she broke this news to you, and rightfully so! I think just about anyone in your particular situation would have reacted the very same way you did. Rest assured though that no doctor in...

Marriage: woes, mid life, married couple
mid life, married couple, watching tv: Hi MJ, Thanks for writing. It sure does sound like you both have the woes, and I am sympathetic to you. Many of us reach a point a mid life where we reflect on where we are in life and what we really want, but this does not have to mean the end of a relationship,...

Marriage: getting over it, grad school, brides
grad school, brides, clue: Hi Madhu, Pretty simple really. Just reading you message to me would be enough to get you over it. The last phrase seems reason enough to get over him, yes? After all, you met him on vacation and were smitten with him, but what do you really know about...

Marriage: getting over it., grad school, brides
grad school, brides, clue: Hi Madhu~ If you have to wait until you get married for another 3 yrs anyway, why bother waiting on him. There are other great guys out there you just have to find them. And especially if you don t think he s into you and he s using you as a back up!...

Marriage: getting over it., grad school, brides
grad school, brides, clue: madhu, I want you to be clear before I answer. I do not understand your culture so I can only answer based on what I believe to be your culture. If you are not ready to get married and you know this then wait. You are still young and have plenty of time...

Marriage: what going on here, perscription plan, unimployment
perscription plan, unimployment, charity case: Hi Linda~ Why is he constantly on your case about every little thing?! His behavior is really unnecessary and very unfair to you! I m not judging him as a person at all, rather his actions that are rude, inappropriate and unacceptable, period. He says...

Marriage: not sure what to do, joseph abraham, dr joseph
joseph abraham, dr joseph, galley: ... should I not care or keep addressing it... keep addressing it. I assume that the do it yourself method would only partially help, if at all; you need a professional counseling intervention. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham ...

Marriage: Advice regarding my relationship, injustice, desires
injustice, desires, senses: Hi Amrin, Any relationship based on a lie is not worth the time that you will spend on it. He is not worth your worry and believe me, you CAN live without him, because you should have someone who is able to be honest and forthright about his affairs and...

Marriage: I Dont know if i love my wife, selfish need, decent cash
selfish need, decent cash, steady job: My dear Chris, no one can tell you why you feel this way. Only you can answer that question. I urge you to go to a good therapist who can help you answer it for yourself. I think you will find it a fascinating process, and very helpful. No matter how long...

Marriage: I Dont know if i love my wife, decent cash, steady job
decent cash, steady job, good wife: Hi Chris~ No, you don t have to stay in a relationship or marriage b/c it s the right thing to do. Actually it would be doing the opposite. You re not doing your wife any favors by staying with her. You re cheating on her and that s bad enough. I presume...

Marriage: I Dont know if i love my wife, marriage counseling, decent cash
marriage counseling, decent cash, steady job: Chris, Hi, There is no generic do or don t advice for you, which means that you need a good talk with yourself. Do not accept staying just because its the right thing to do . But before getting out of your marriage you can open up and see if...

Marriage: depressed wife/little intimacy, kindergarden teacher, depression medication
kindergarden teacher, depression medication, chemical imbalance: Hi Paul~ Depression medication can affect a persons sex drive and make it low or even non-existent. She can ask her doctor to try another medication to see if that helps. Or it could be a chemical imbalance on her part as well. There are other ways to...

Marriage: Emotional and financial abuse, mental torture, household expenses
mental torture, household expenses, manic phase: Hi Kanwal~ I know traditionally the Indian culture is very against divorce. However, I think in this situation it may call for a divorce due to his abusive ways and treatment of you. This has gone on long enough as you ve said, you ve grown tired and...

Marriage: Family and Distance Between..., nieces and nephews, chicago area
nieces and nephews, chicago area, hump: Hi Charles, I reread your note a few times over to get a better idea of exactly what the situation is. I took some time to think about it and have come to the conclusion that perhaps you should sit and talk to your wife at length about this issue and perhaps...

Marriage: My husband stays in contact with his exes, mirror image, peace of mind
Marriage: My husband stays in contact with his exes, mirror image, peace of mind, girlfriends

Marriage: fighting, wise one, brandy
wise one, brandy, hard time: Hi Brandy, Thanks for writing. I know you are going through a hard time in your marriage and I feel badly for you. The question you ask is so complicated that books have been written about it. In the end it will be your decision, but you want it ti be a...

Marriage: Hello, unpleasant experiences, depression issues
unpleasant experiences, depression issues, deep in my heart: Hi Lyndsay~ It s not realistic to say that you won t ever hurt each other at some point in the marriage. As everyone gets their feelings hurt by something sooner or later in life, it just happens and unfortunately there is no way to avoid that. It s a...

Marriage: Husband is Confused, shreds, soulmates
shreds, soulmates, limbo: Him going to counseling even once a week will help you both. If the counselor is worth anything she will make him realize his responsibility. You will have to determine how long to give him because it is based on your patience level. I would not even try to...

Marriage: Husband doesn't want have sex anymore, marriage therapist, childhood crush
marriage therapist, childhood crush, best doctor: Hi Ida, Thanks for writing. I m sorry you are having a difficult time. When I read your letter two things stuck out for me: The issue has only been since Thanksgiving, which isn t a very long time, and YOU are the one in the living room. I am wondering...

Marriage: Husband's lack of sex drive... worrying me, lack of sex drive, sexy lingerie
lack of sex drive, sexy lingerie, lack of sex: Hi Laura, I m a bit perplexed as I cannot see the connection between the enuresis and the sex drive. One does not seem to have much to do with the other, but I may be wrong as I am not a medical professional in any way. If I understand correctly, this...

Marriage: Husband's lack of sex drive... worrying me, sexual side effects, joseph abraham
sexual side effects, joseph abraham, lack of sex drive: Laura, 1. Go yourself (or with him) to the urologist and get the info about the medical problem, the treatment procedure and the sexual side effects. 2. Most likely that manual stimulation (you masturbate him) would be the best way to make a ‘sexuality...

Marriage: help, injustice, desires
injustice, desires, senses: Hi Amrin, Thanks for writing. My dear, you have my deepest sympathy for what you are going through. You are dating and in love with a very immature man who does not know himself very well. That is why one day he wants X, the next day he wants Y, then when...

Marriage: Is there hope here ?, dowry in india, orthodox family
dowry in india, orthodox family, self doubt: Hi Ruc, If you read your own message to me, you will find a lot of answers in there. Read it like it was someone else sending it to you, and you ll see that there is more reason not to be in this marriage than there is reason to be in it. That having...

Marriage: My husband cheated on me with my son's father..., father having sex, marriage counselling
father having sex, marriage counselling, gordian knot: Hi Danielle~ I agree with you I don t think it s appropriate to tell your son about what his father and your husband have been doing together. It would upset him and probably devastate him as well, and in turn that could affect him and his school work,...

Marriage: My husband's lack of sex drive... making me unhappy, enuresis in marriage
enuresis in marriage: Hi Laura, Thanks for writing. Let me get this straight -- your husband is a bed wetter and you didn t even know it? That is amazing. But the good news is that there are fantastic treatments for enuresis that are very effective. Your husband does not...

Marriage: My husband stays in contact with his exes, trust issue, exes
trust issue, exes, loose ends: Hi Mic, Thanks for writing. I am sorry for your frustration. You have every right to be concerned about how your husband is acting. If he was my partner, I d punt kick him out the door! He is absolutely wrong that what he is doing is acceptable. He...

Marriage: My husband's had his third heart attack this year..., heart specialist, dye test
heart specialist, dye test, invasive procedure: Hi Marie~ If you ve ever watched programs that have to do with health. I watch them a lot. And one of the things that you should have checked out are his arteries and see if they are clogged. If his arteries are 90% clogged, etc then he s going to be at...

Marriage: Loveless Marriage., loveless marriage, stay at home mom
loveless marriage, stay at home mom, loving marriage: Hi Michelle, I read your message over a few times, and I believe that there is only one thing for you to do, and that is to sit down with your husband and calmly discuss where you are and where you want to be in 10 years from now. I think that you both...

Marriage: Marriage, liberal man, wise decision
liberal man, wise decision, mate: Henry, Henry ... I find it hard to believe that you are absolutely clueless and need an actual recipe for finding a woman -- just use your head and heart. You be honest and make sure she is honest. This list was not in any certain order. I was just telling...

Marriage: Marriage, joseph abraham, interaction effect
joseph abraham, interaction effect, asian age: Henry, The issue is determinded by the interaction effect of your personality and your lifestyle. 2-3 sessions are required in orderto know you better before a professional will have a reasonable info in order to provide a professional opinion. ...

Marriage: Marriage, heart of hearts, successful marriage
heart of hearts, successful marriage, unplanned pregnancy: Hi Calvin~ If you re doing it for all the right reasons (meaning deciding to marry each other) as opposed to all the wrong. Otherwise you re just asking for heartache and problems down the road. Let me clarify what I mean here. A person shouldn t feel...

Marriage: Marriage and Infidelity, sex with my husband, emotional wreck
sex with my husband, emotional wreck, distant family: Hi Lisa~ I can t condone cheating of any form in a marriage at all. This is coming from a person that s been cheated on, it tears marriages apart and ruins lives. Men that cheat do not care about the women that they cheat with, I know that sounds cliche...

Marriage: Mother in Law, BPD, Borderline Personality Disorder
BPD, Borderline Personality Disorder, Doctor Becky: Hi Anna, I sure am sorry for the situation you are in -- it sounds like hell! It sounds like your mother-in-law may have a personality disorder called BPD or Borderline Personality Disorder. It is as dreadful to live with as it is common -- one in 8 to...

Marriage: marriage, older man, young girls
older man, young girls, sherry: Sherry, I am not sure what you mean by teenager. Is she at least 18 because if not you husband could be arrested for messing with a teenager. I believe that if she is over 18 that he will see her for what she is quickly because young girls usually find...

Marriage: marriage, caste system, kind regards
caste system, kind regards, fates: Hi Dolly, I m sorry but I am not sufficiently knowledgeable about your customs or traditions when it comes to these matters. I am Canadian born and raised, and these types of things are not very often variables here, as we place more importance on the...

Marriage: Is marriage salvagable?, joseph abraham, selfish person
joseph abraham, selfish person, decent person: I sense that your issue falls into the relationship and sexuality and not attractiveness . I therefore definitely recommend counseling prior to filing for a divorce. See my site and consider my phone / webcam services. Regards, Dr....

Marriage: married husband+sex sites, laugh alot, sexual person
laugh alot, sexual person, martial status: Hi Tha, Thanks for writing. It sounds like your husband enjoys his pron very much, and by definition it becomes a problem when it affects his life in negative ways -- and apparently it is, since you are upset about it. Yes, it is normal for a guy to look...

Marriage: How to move back in, joseph abraham, interaction effect
joseph abraham, interaction effect, prescribed medication: Doug, Since anger and violent behavior issues are not only yours it indicates that your prescribed medication is not the cause but the trigger. The problems are generated by the interaction effect of your (both) personalities and marriage style. You...

Marriage: I need your advise, high uric acid, kidney stones
high uric acid, kidney stones, capable men: Hi Khristine, If you cannot discuss the issue with this man then that is a real problem. He makes sure you can t by having the physical and emotional reactions when issues are addressed. This is a way of controlling you, my dear. Stop falling for it. (In...

Marriage: Please Help, bald tires, spoken person
bald tires, spoken person, ulcerative colitis: Cheryl, Your husband is in denial and is experiencing a crisis. You have to get professional help on this one, otherwise one of you will be miserable indeed, if not the both of you. He seems unwilling to face anything unless it is on his terms. That...

Marriage: problems with trust, piece of candy, nth degree
piece of candy, nth degree, lack of trust: Hi Sandra, Thanks for writing. Honesty is the foundation on which a healthy relationship must stand. Without it all sorts of trouble will take place, so I understand completely why you would be so concerned -- even if it is about one piece of candy. Of...

Marriage: Responsibilites, relationship status, first glance
relationship status, first glance, dinner with friends: Hi KC~ No, I don t think you re really being that unreasonable at all. She didn t communicate with you that well, and it was just an all around bad situation that she put you in. And in a way she took full advantage of you and knew that you had the responsibility...

Marriage: Separation, roomates, waste of money
roomates, waste of money, wallet: Hi Tanya, I am really sorry that your marriage has become so cold and unbearable. You have a right to happiness, and if divorce is the answer then so be it. Your husband says you can t afford two separate living places, but what is your opinion? Do you...

Marriage: Seperation, work friends, lieing
work friends, lieing, yesterday morning: Ashley, Your situation is complicated; does not suitable for an one time e-mail advice reply. There is no generic reply for your questions; I have to talk to your husband and thereafter to you in order to get into the professional ability to give some...

Marriage: sexless marriage, gold medalist, second cousin
gold medalist, second cousin, roller coaster: Hi Pomy, Your situation sounds like a real mess and you have my deepest sympathy. It s hard to say why your husband is behaving the way he is, and he really owes it to you to talk to you honestly about it. Short of that, I would say that he hasn t kept...

Marriage: My son's cheerleading hobby... follow-up to it., heart to heart talk, cheerleading squad
heart to heart talk, cheerleading squad, disciplinary matter: Hi Joanne~ I don t know what kind of university that they are running, but it is not acceptable for them to have uniforms for both genders that look this way. This is clearly sexist when they say that they are for all genders, which it s quite clear they...

Marriage: My son's taken up cheerleading..., cheerleading team, cheerleading uniform
cheerleading team, cheerleading uniform, cheerleader outfits: Hi Joanne~ That s great that he s joined the cheerleading team! It can be good for self confidence, self-esteem, etc. HOWEVER, and that s a big however. It isn t appropriate by any means for him to wear a female cheerleading uniform, and for several...

Marriage: should i stay? baby on the way., baby sonograms, marriage work
baby sonograms, marriage work, abusive relationship: Hi Kira~ You need to leave him NOW and FOR GOOD! Trust me, I know that it s like to be in an abusive relationship, my first marriage my ex-husband tried to control me (but it didn t work b/c I didn t allow it), he was abusive mentally, verbally, mentally...

Marriage: I think i want to leave my marriage, nasty times, pain in the butt
nasty times, pain in the butt, exsisting: Hi Wendy~ You re doing your children a great disservice the longer you stay with their father. This shows them that it s okay to take the abuse you have for years and to be treated with disrespect by your husband, their father. That is not okay or acceptable...

Marriage: Wanting different things in a marriage., marine mechanic school, month old baby
marine mechanic school, month old baby, hr job: Alison, I sense that your issue falls into the power struggle or appropriate status between partners. I don t see how it is possible to provide a professional opinion without talking and listening to each of you; it means one session with each and...

Marriage: Wife cheated 5 years ago., sexual person, rough time
sexual person, rough time, business trips: Hi Mark~ Cheating is the ultimate betrayal in a marriage, and it doesn t matter if it happened recently or in the past long ago. It still hurts to find something like this out from someone you love and that you ve committed your life to, and especially...

Marriage: My wife is in another country, risky situation, heartbreak
risky situation, heartbreak, sure thing: Hi Ray, Thanks for writing. I really feel for you. Your question is a tough one a you ARE in a risky situation and uncertain situation that is out of your control .. if I were you I would focus on my own happiness and do what I could to be supportive of...

Marriage: My wife's odd behaviour..., alternate personality, masculine version
alternate personality, masculine version, best of both worlds: Hi James, It sounds like your wife is a female cross dresser. I have had male clients who do this and love it -- they also are not gay and still love the heterosexual partners they have. Problem is, the partners don t usually take it well, but the best...

Marriage: wife selection, citizen population, emotional maturity
citizen population, emotional maturity, sexual peak: Hi Tesh, Thanks for writing. I don t know where you got your information, but what you heard is absolutely not true. I don t think you can throw men and women in a box and say all of them are a certain way. Still, I d like to address your ideas one-by-one:...

Marriage: wife selection, sexual drive, making love
sexual drive, making love, libido: Hi Tesh, I don t know that the age difference is necessary as essential as one may think, unless sex is the only important variable of people remaining together in a long relationship. I believe it to be true that women lose their libido more rapidly than...

Marriage: 2ND MARRIAGE COMPETITION, christian counseling center, hyde syndrome
christian counseling center, hyde syndrome, god will take care: Hi Karen, Well, I have to admit that this is a problem indeed. I am all for people evolving in a good way and if religion helps them to do that , then by all means. If, on the other hand, it makes people believe that their way is the only way, then I...

Marriage: divorce, alienation of affection, great attitude
alienation of affection, great attitude, military men: Donna, The first thing you have to ask is what my wedding vows mean to me. If you can say that your vows mean nothing then consider what life will be like without your husband. If he has been made aware of the situation and is unwilling to change then maybe...

Marriage: First time marriage, adaptation period, share feelings
adaptation period, share feelings, responsible adults: Hi Al, Beat advice I can give to is to expect that things will change drastically. Having aid that, I do not mean it as a negative, but more so as a warning to you that things will not be the same as when you were alone in your home. Over time, we...

Marriage: First time marriage, joseph abraham, case summaries
joseph abraham, case summaries, dr joseph: Al, Your situation / question needs a short counseling process (4-6 sessions), based on specific relevant info, backgrounds and personality / psychological current state of the three of you. There is no way to assist you via a generic reply. See my...

Marriage: my husbands past is haunting me, lady friends, facebook
Marriage: my husbands past is haunting me, lady friends, facebook, exact same thing

Marriage: Hurt during initial yrs of marriage, joseph abraham, family counselor
joseph abraham, family counselor, marriage family: Your situation needs a counseling process. 2-3 months would do it (8-10 sessions). Find a local marriage / family counselor or use my online phone counseling (see my site for a few relevant case summaries and articles). Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham...

Marriage: Husband Admits to "fooling around", joseph abraham, dr joseph
joseph abraham, dr joseph, family friend: If you want to do it, Just Do It. Do not talk or mention the issue for at least 6 months. Even if your husband wants to. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Husband is Still Texting Other Woman, al anon meetings, male friend
al anon meetings, male friend, seperation: Hi Cindy~ You are very right to think this way and to be skeptical of his intentions. As you already mentioned, actions DO apeak louder than his words ever can. He s saying what he thinks you want him to say, at this point he s only playing mind games...

Marriage: What can I do to help my marriage after my affairs?, adultery
adultery: Hello Johan, I don t know that you fully understand how devastated your wife is. Betrayal wounds so deeply that it s like dying a death yet still walking around breathing. It wounds every part of a woman...spirit, soul, and body. God takes this so seriously...

Marriage: hubby is a bully, emotional immaturity, joseph abraham
emotional immaturity, joseph abraham, poor manners: Loyalty shift towards parents or lack of loyalty towards the spouse is most likely a result of emotional immaturity or problematic marital relationship. A situation of “you stay, but the baby goes” is not supposed to happen. Your situation needs a counseling...

Marriage: my husbands past is haunting me, marital issues, long commute
marital issues, long commute, commute home: HI Jeanne, I am happy that you have chosen this course of action. Your evolution as a person looking for happiness need not be compromised by his current lack of it. Find out whether he truly is committed to making your marriage work, and then step...

Marriage: Leaving Mentally abusive Husband, marriage and kids, abusive husband
marriage and kids, abusive husband, kessler: Hi Emily~ You already know that you have to leave him and this time for good. He s an abuser and that s unacceptable and totally inappropriate for him to do to you and especially when you have children involved. After all if he ll do this to you, then...

Marriage: Can I learn to love my husband?, joseph abraham, proper material
joseph abraham, proper material, dr joseph: Before you turn your attention, desire or love to someone around you, you should tune to the one who is within you: your self . Your situation requires counseling. There is no ‘quick –fix’ answer for you. See my site for the proper material and counseling...

Marriage: my marriage is getting rocky, types of pain killers, quitting a job
types of pain killers, quitting a job, ultimatums: Hi Bryce~ It s never easy to live with parents or in-laws. Trust me, been there and done that. It puts a huge strain on even the best relationship that you may have with an in-law. It s stressful not having your own space, with your own privacy, etc...

Marriage: marriage separation, joseph abraham, family counselor
joseph abraham, family counselor, marriage separation: Stacy, The other lady is not THE problem; your relationship is. Your situation needs a counseling process. Find a local marriage / family counselor or use my online phone counseling (see my site for a few relevant case summaries and articles). ...

Marriage: How to make my marriage work again?, marriage work, twin girls
marriage work, twin girls, cuddles: Hi Johan~ A person cheats for several reasons, the main one in general being that they are seeking some sort of love, comfort, attention, attraction, affection from someone other than their spouse. Typically this happens when they aren t receiving this...

Marriage: Please Help, marriage, divorce
marriage, divorce, adultery: Hi Jeanne, I do recommend counseling for you both, but not secular and especially not from a lesbian. You need Godly pastoral counseling. Your husband needs to learn what Christ teaches to men on how to be husbands and you won t get this from a secular...

Marriage: My relationship, valentine s day, stressful business
valentine s day, stressful business, yahoo games: Your situation needs a professional evaluation process and probably counseling time. A month or two would do it (4-6 sessions). Find a local marriage / family counselor or use my online phone counseling (see my site for a few relevant case summaries and...

Marriage: Separation, free seminars, furniture bed
free seminars, furniture bed, ups and downs: As a counselor I tend not to provide direct answers, but facilitate the process of empowering my clients, allowing them to boost their ability and produce the desired outcome. For the Empowerment journey you may look for free seminars and self help books...

Marriage: Underage Marriage, hasty decision, legal experience
hasty decision, legal experience, parental consent: Hi Phil, That s more of a question pertaining to legal issues than a marriage question, in my view. It s not part of my expertise. I would however wish to take the opportunity to caution you on what you are about to do. I could go into a long spiel...

Marriage: Can u pls advise, incorrect approach, crying all day
incorrect approach, crying all day, fr 3: Hi Jyotsana, You give me little information to work with to familiarize myself with what the customs or traditions may be in your country, but after doing a little bit of research on your name moonlight , I noticed that perhaps you are from India. Having...

Marriage: Am I unfair?, 24 years, fun things
24 years, fun things, snowmobiling: Hi Mel, What to say? Let me attempt to show you the truth by using myself as an example. My wife and I have been together for 24 years as well. We do everything together, even worked together when we were in business. Guess what, though. When I...

Marriage: 3 yrs married !!...Andrea, divorce is not the answer, best buddies
divorce is not the answer, best buddies, god doesnt: Hi Andrea, I m happy I could be of some assistance and hope that you will both find a way to make your marriage a thing of beauty. you would be amazed to know how good it can feel to be married when both partners are best buddies and looking towards achieving...

Marriage: Will he ever ask me to marry him?, joseph abraham, promise ring
joseph abraham, promise ring, dr joseph: We live in a modern world. Do not wait for him to ask. Talk with him about the issue. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: convenincing the parents for the love marriage., kind nature, relation ship
kind nature, relation ship, good deeds: Amit, What you have to do is to show how much you love this girl. You do not care what she looks like because she is the one you want to marry. I can understand that your parents think that you can do better but you feel you have the best. They have to...

Marriage: I don't know how to love my husband anymore, downstairs bathroom, physical aggression
downstairs bathroom, physical aggression, second marriage: Jenny, I do not have a good ‘quick fix’ reply for you since there is no simple solution to a very complex situation as yours. Since I’m not a lawyer, I’m not going to replace you and produce the answers, but facilitate the process of empowering your decision...

Marriage: drowning in depression, drowning in depression, post traumatic stress
drowning in depression, post traumatic stress, joseph abraham: You both need counseling; start NOW. Do not wait for him. There is no magic word that would immadiately solve the problem; only professional counseling (3-4 months). Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com ...

Marriage: Ex and another relationship, red flags, grandmom
red flags, grandmom, new partner: Hi Emily, Let s first put to bed the main issue. This is not a race to replace, yes? You should in no way even be questioning this issue at all. Here is why. He has found someone but who tells you that it is the right person? He cheated on you and...

Marriage: I don't know how to love my husband anymore
Marriage: I don't know how to love my husband anymore

Marriage: Stay-at-home mom vs husband, stay at home mom, staying home
Marriage: Stay-at-home mom vs husband, stay at home mom, staying home, eachother

Marriage: Underaged marriage, girls body, family history
Marriage: Underaged marriage, girls body, family history, brains

Marriage: fights in marriage, heart to heart talk, calm manner
heart to heart talk, calm manner, heart to heart: Hi Miriam~ Being newly married can be a trying time for both parties. After all it s getting to know someone that you re now sharing your life with. So it ll take some adjusting and getting used to. Marriage is a constant work in progress, and it s very,...

Marriage: first time marriage: going on 3 yrs, one of those guys, personal evolution
one of those guys, personal evolution, fundamental characteristics: Hi Andrea, I will let you in on something important and hope you did do what was necessary before you got married, because after the fact, it can often be a difficult task to achieve. Was your husband like this even before you married him? I think so...

Marriage: Gambling ultimatum, confidence increases, few coins
confidence increases, few coins, drunken nights: Hi Kathy~ If you had/have a zero tolerance of the gambling, then you need to stick to your word. After all your word is your bond. What I mean by this is you have to say what you mean and then mean what you say b/c if you don t then this is going to keep...

Marriage: Help, local psychologist, marriage counselor
local psychologist, marriage counselor, joseph abraham: You are not going to by God. Just talk to your husband as you are talking to me now. It is perfectly o.k to feel what you feel. Just move on. If you need furhter help concider a short counseling period with a local psychologist / marriage counselor...

Marriage: Hurt by affair, trial separation, perfect couple
trial separation, perfect couple, work situation: I have neither easy answer nor simple. Generally speaking about men: the “Push –Pull” theory holds that most men’s deviations from their relationship is not because they are being pulled (attracted) to the new relationship but mainly because they perceive...

Marriage: Husband Problems, heart to heart talk, heart to heart
heart to heart talk, heart to heart, beautiful daughter: Hi Angela~ You must confront him about what you ve found. He s saying one thing to you and doing another behind your back. So, yes, he s lying to you and that s unacceptable and totally inappropriate, period. He has no excuse for what he s doing at all....

Marriage: Husband sexuality, unpleasant experiences, army base
unpleasant experiences, army base, sexual acts: Yes, your marriage can be saved. No, I cannot give a definite prediction. Yes, people change, and a combat experience does a lot to the “growth hormone” (Maturation... Responsibility, and so on). No, I cannot see any reasonable help given via free e-mail...

Marriage: My husband asked me for time for himself. However we dont know if is what we need, best day of my life, loving person
best day of my life, loving person, money money: Hi Edith, Thank you for trying to explain in detail your issue. I do have a few questions if I may before I move into the next step of understanding fully all the issues so that I can try to help you. If I understand correctly, you and this Iranian...

Marriage: Insecurities, frequent sex, intimate relationship
frequent sex, intimate relationship, sexual issues: 1. A male’s strong libido and his continuous urge for frequent sex with his spouse does not necessarily indicates pathology or any other ‘abnormal misbehavior’. Nevertheless, it does create a lot of tension, once the spouse’s ‘Tempo’ is different. Bridging...

Marriage: When you know there is no hope, marriage counselor, beliving
marriage counselor, beliving, death of a parent: Hi Ceci, When was the last time you two went away for a week or a weekend? I strongly suggest you do yourselves a favor and spend at least two days together without your regular surroundings. No work, No house, No kids. Just the two of you and your...

Marriage: Mariage in Mexico, marriage in mexico, what do i do with my life
marriage in mexico, what do i do with my life, legal marriage: Maria, That is a different question and I think I can help here. If there were not married in a church by a Pastor or priest then I do not think they were really married. I do not think the church would recognize this as a marriage. He needs to check and...

Marriage: Marriage/Separation, marriage separation, valiant effort
marriage separation, valiant effort, right move: Hi Melanie, I think that there is little more you can do to show that you have made all the necessary efforts to save what could be saved. It is clear to me that you will NOT make this man change. His procrastination is clear, and I m sure you now realize...

Marriage: marriage, two partners, life partner
two partners, life partner, caste: Hi Shibani, I would have trouble telling you if there are problem with that type of marriage, because you have not really stated why your father is against this marriage. From your message I understand that the parents seem to have a big say in this, so...

Marriage: marriage, joseph abraham, responsible life
joseph abraham, responsible life, having a good time: Run. The sooner, the better. The faster, the better. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: marriage counseling, marriage counseling, joseph abraham
marriage counseling, joseph abraham, pa licensure: My academic and professional background are from another country; to answer your question go to the PA licensure board and to verious universities who offer the program(s). Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Regarding my marriage life, marriage life, biblical advice
marriage life, biblical advice, religious family: Amit, The first thing to do is to let your wife know what you are going to tolerate. If she is not willing to live with you and be your wife then she may not be ready for marriage. She sounds like she is not willing to follow her own Biblical advice. The...

Marriage: Stay-at-home mom vs husband, cost of daycare, household tasks
cost of daycare, household tasks, home mom: Whoever still holds traditional 19th century view of parental roles -Mama does the job at home since Papa has a hard job at the factory – are either less educated or just blind ; first, they do see the their children interacting with the world (and get the...

Marriage: seperation, joseph abraham, hurtful words
joseph abraham, hurtful words, case summaries: I need to have much more info in order to say something meaningful; but generally speaking, I m not capable to effectively help with such a situation via anonymous e-mails; it requires continuous paid phone or webcam counseling (about 4-6 sessions) . See my...

Marriage: speratation and arguing, marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, systematic assessment: A professional opinion is first based on a systematic assessment of initial interview(s) and thereafter from observing the process of working together with an effort to solve some of the underlying issues. At this point therefore I have no opinion to share...

Marriage: He talks about her all the time!!!, month old baby, delicate situation
month old baby, delicate situation, married man: Hi Michelle~ This can be a very tricky and delicate situation that you re in. On one hand he feels confident enough to tell you that he s talking to her, that she s confiding in him about her life, etc and now he s wanting to befriend her even more on...

Marriage: thoughts of marriage, colored glasses, effert
colored glasses, effert, hopes and dreams: Hi Tommy, Give her time. The best thing that you can do now, is simply and calmly express your love to her, and your desire to be with her going forward on a basis of being a couple in the eyes of the law. This commitment on your part having been made,...

Marriage: am ttred, and out but cant get my mind out of the rut, toll free numbers, abusive situation
toll free numbers, abusive situation, domestic abuse: Hi Rosemary~ He s an abuser! And this this shouldn t be taken lightly at all. You have to stop making excuses for his behavior. Can t you see what he s doing to you? Maybe you don t right now. He s degrading you, disrespecting you, etc. If he truly...

Marriage: Underaged marriage, marriagelicense, age of consent
marriagelicense, age of consent, trouble with the law: Hi Daniela, I ll simply say that at 15, you are a child yourself, and you are with child. That s definitely something that should trigger some serious questions in your mind. I ll not give you advice or my impressions as to the problems you may encounter...

Marriage: 10 Year Itch?, reluctant participant, hardworker
reluctant participant, hardworker, early retirement: Hi Jocelynn~ I can certainly understand how a big age gap can affect your closeness or bond to him. I m 8 yrs older than my husband, and it can be difficult at times to relate to him. He s more a plain jane lifestyle person (with being raised differently...

Marriage: BORED IN MARRIAGE, joseph abraham, low self esteem
joseph abraham, low self esteem, dr joseph: Lisa, I do not see how you can be bored, but I do see how sick it is… There is nothing that I can offer as a ‘quick fix’ advice; you both require 3-4 months of individual combined with couple counseling. This process has a high potential to transform your...

Marriage: Confusion....., couple beers, guilt trip
couple beers, guilt trip, perfect husband: Marriage is a reciprocal chain of behaviors; something within one spouse’s actions triggers the others. Your husband s picture , as per your description, is being shaped mostly by you and / or your actions / reactions / lake of proper act. His behavior...

Marriage: Ex boyfriend married, thoughts and feelings, indian culture
thoughts and feelings, indian culture, indian woman: Hi Ashley~ That s the way most of the Indian culture is, is through arranged marriages. They do that to preserve the Indian culture and to please their family (they are very family oriented in India). But anyway to get to your point and your issues. ...

Marriage: emotional infidelity, private lap dance, emotional infidelity
private lap dance, emotional infidelity, many blessings: Hi April~ The lying is a big time trust breaker b/c he not only betrayed you by going to a strip club, but that he did this in a condom and left it in his car. The whole thing is just a very bad choice in his part. He probably lied b/c he was not only...

Marriage: emotionally abusive, joseph abraham, happy marriage
joseph abraham, happy marriage, extramarital affair: You should continue the counseling process; inquire about divorce. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: ex-girlfriend, cindy cindy, dating period
cindy cindy, dating period, great relationship: Cindy, My question to you is: do you think this is going to continue for the rest of my life and I just have to accept that she will be involved in our lives? My answer: Your quality of married life will determainife that. Do you think counseling...

Marriage: BORED IN MARRIAGE, self worth, self esteem
Marriage: BORED IN MARRIAGE, self worth, self esteem, happiness

Marriage: Husband won't work, marriage counselors, passive aggression
Marriage: Husband won't work, marriage counselors, passive aggression, separation agreement

Marriage: Husband & midlife crisis, terrific marriage, mr hyde
terrific marriage, mr hyde, signs point: Midlife crisis is not a cause, but an effect; since marriage is a reciprocal chain of behaviors, it is not enough to look only at the spouse’s side. Generally speaking, it is very good that you both participate in a counseling process and it is strongly...

Marriage: Husband's sexual addiction, exhibishionist, joseph abraham
exhibishionist, joseph abraham, sexual addiction: You should let HIM do the effort of trying. Either intensive and serious counseling participation - or out of this marriage. And you both need to participate. It seems that his behavior is more of a Marriage issue than a Sexual deviant counseling topic....

Marriage: Husband won't work, anger issues, low self esteem
anger issues, low self esteem, abusive men: It seems to me that both vocational (to your husband) as well as marital counseling (you both need to transform your attitudes) are needed; my best advice therefore: set a mutual ultimatum, to start the process within a month. Not a day later. Search for...

Marriage: In Laws, marriage lives, small town girl
marriage lives, small town girl, dear don: Hi Anjana, If I correctly understood your message, it would seem that he has understood the problem and is willing to play a role that fits with your needs. I would suggest you sit back and allow him to do so. Give the issue a rest for a bit and allow...

Marriage: Lazy Husband, ordering pizza, lazy husband
ordering pizza, lazy husband, dirty laundry: I do know you and details about you, so I can only comment from a theoretical point of view: Marriage is a reciprocal chain of behaviors; something within one spouse’s actions triggers the others. This allows me to speculate: Your husband s picture ,...

Marriage: Marriage and sacrifices, stupid excuse, social circles
stupid excuse, social circles, finding job: There is no way that someone who does not know your background, personality, traits, abilities, social circles and so on, can assist in such issues. You need a few counseling sessions; a professional needs a lot of info before an opinion is made. I estimate...

Marriage: Marriage separation possible, financial crises, marriage separation
financial crises, marriage separation, iron fist: Hi Jared~ I do know exactly what it feels like to live with parents, I had to do this with my first husband, where we had to temporarily live with my parents for about 6 months or so. It was absolutely miserable for all of us. This is why I d always advise...

Marriage: Marriage separation, strict parameters, marriage separation
strict parameters, marriage separation, mother in law: HI Jared, I m happy that you gave me more information, as this makes it a whole lot easier to understand the situation. I guess I was right on from the start. It pretty well confirms what I was saying before. You are guests, and she will run you, simple...

Marriage: marriage, fortune teller, delhi india
fortune teller, delhi india, 16 april: Hi Lata, I m sorry but I am not a fortune teller. There is no way that I can know when you will get married, but when you do, I hope it will be to someone you love. Tell your mother she need need not worry about your future. After all, it is your future,...

Marriage: marriage different country, heart to heart talk, lonely feeling
heart to heart talk, lonely feeling, thoughts and feelings: Hi Rebekah~ Have you sat him down and tried to explain all this to him and to figure out why he s not being considerate of your thoughts and feelings? If not, then you need to sit down with him and have a serious heart to heart talk with him. He needs...

Marriage: Is marriage always this hard?, daily basis, disservice
daily basis, disservice, rest of my life: Hi Rebecca~ There is only hope if you want there to be hope, and to try if you want to try. It s not going to get any better if you can t be honest enough with yourself and him to tell him how you feel, think, etc. After all that s what a marriage is...

Marriage: marriage....is this normal??, joseph abraham, necessary transformation
joseph abraham, necessary transformation, professional involvement: Angie, Most people are not born lazy, but are influenced by their surroundings when motivation is the issue. It could be that something in your marital as well as your husband’s vocational field is unbalanced. I assume that a short period of professional...

Marriage: need help, australia 6, butting heads
australia 6, butting heads, power struggle: Hi Linda, I m afraid you went into this marriage a tad too fast. you were in love , and you and I both know that such a high emotional state often prohibits us from seeing things in a clear manner. I think that if you both want this to work, you ll...

Marriage: Problemetic marital relationship, marriage relationship, desperate housewife
marriage relationship, desperate housewife, physical relationships: No e-mail cook book manual is available to re-structure marriage relationship. The expectation to receive a guideline that would change a ten years period, is unrealistic. You both nee a longitudinal counseling. Find a local source or use my phone counseling...

Marriage: possessive sister-in-law, joseph abraham, chior
joseph abraham, chior, possessiveness: Mary, In order to do something I need more info; so let me guide you, and you will do the job... Psychologically speaking, every behavior has its underlying motive and its on-going reinforcement. Discuss with your husband her possible motives; find...

Marriage: pre-marrital problem, weed seeds, new girlfriend
weed seeds, new girlfriend, work address: Hi Yummy, Well well.........the things we find out when it comes down to it, eh? Reconsidering is not such a bad option from what I hear. First thing I would like to mention is that if indeed your fiance sends weed-seeds to your work address, you...

Marriage: premarital debt, joseph abraham, lavish wedding
joseph abraham, lavish wedding, dr joseph: You sould consult with a lawyer. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Ready to commit?, long distance relationship, silly little things
long distance relationship, silly little things, current boyfriend: Sarah, I can see that you would hesitate to get married. I would also caution not to enter into marriage without really wanting to be married. You need to make sure that this is the guy you want to spend your life with. If you have any doubt at all you...

Marriage: Scared of changes and meeting challenges, stupid excuse, finding job
stupid excuse, finding job, final answer: Hi Olga, Before I give you a final answer, could you tell me the following, please? What nationality is he, and tell me yours as well. I guess Ukranian for you, but I want to be sure. Also, please tell me where he would like you to move to and whether...

Marriage: scared to get hurt again and again, fundamental character, emotional state
fundamental character, emotional state, giving birth: Hi Lost, I read your message a few times over and noticed something that jumped out at me. I understand your emotional state and clearly see that you are somewhat confused with regards to this issue. Let me go through what you are saying so that we...

Marriage: separation, paycheck to paycheck, marriage counselor
paycheck to paycheck, marriage counselor, college graduates: Hi Pat~ No, I don t think you re nuts at all. This is a trying time for you and the entire family. You have to keep the mind set that things will be fine and things will eventually get better over time. It s rough for you and rightfully so, after all...

Marriage: separation, intestinal blockage, stage 4
intestinal blockage, stage 4, hernia: Hi Pat~ It s very hard to come to terms with a marriage failing (for whatever reason), as you said it s scary, upsetting, devastating, etc all rolled into one. You have to know that you can t blame him or yourself for how all this turned out. You can...

Marriage: To tell or not to tell?, joseph abraham, dr abraham
joseph abraham, dr abraham, dr joseph: Tell him, in person! Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: A thing of privacy, joseph abraham, marriage life
joseph abraham, marriage life, great relationship: Psychologically, something is not kosher there. Marriage life permits many acquaintances, but not the kind that are hidden from the spouse. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Complicated and confusing marriage, joseph abraham, consultation time
joseph abraham, consultation time, marriage life: Please consider a theoretical ground and potential explanation: the Push-Pull theory. Generally speaking the concept holds that most deviations from a relationship is not because the person is being pulled (attracted) to a new circumstance or a relationship...

Marriage: Concerns about penis size, negative feedback loop, heart to heart talk
negative feedback loop, heart to heart talk, heart to heart: Hi Timothy~ Sorry it s taken me so long to get back with you. It took me a while to figure out how to respond to this. I can see how this can seem emasculating to you when she says this, b/c men tend to be pretty sensitive about their manhood, manliness,...

Marriage: I am confused, boyfriend and girlfriend, married man
boyfriend and girlfriend, married man, single man: Hi Gnomta, I think that your feelings are not warranted, because you have to bear the responsibility of your choice. when you first met this fellow, you knew he was married, and you chose to continue the relationship nonetheless. Now you question whether...

Marriage: How to cope with an over achieving spouse, cub scout den, full time job
cub scout den, full time job, joseph abraham: If your relationship is being damaged due to your wife’s work-co-holism, you both should seek marriage counseling; her busy schedule could be the symptom for the more serious avoidance (from you) problem. If your relationship is satisfactory, you may want...

Marriage: EMDR, joseph abraham, negative emotion
joseph abraham, negative emotion, marriage counseling: I see no connection to HER difficulties and past issues, with or without the EMDR therapeutic technique; it is YOUR issue, probably related to trust, control and attraction (physical and personality wise). Due to the personal nature of the reasons for your...

Marriage: When is enough...enough? Husband addicted to porn, porn fantasies, happy news
porn fantasies, happy news, square 1: Hi Gwen, I read your message carefully, and will not make this a very long answer. your choice is clear and it is time to move on. You are thirty and have a long life ahead of you. It makes no sense whatsoever to continue to give this man the benefit...

Marriage: I am confused
Marriage: I am confused

Marriage: gift, joseph abraham, graduation gift
joseph abraham, graduation gift, dr joseph: My opinion is that this $100 is a very low price to bridge the 10 years gap. Enjoy the family chain and tradition renewal! All the best, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: gift, graduation gift, ample opportunity
graduation gift, ample opportunity, nephews: Hi Alexis, Your sense of logic is very intact and I have to agree with you 100%. If your husband had wanted to have a relationship with his nephew, all he had to do was pick up the phone. the fact that he does not get along with his sister should not...

Marriage: Husband Spends too much time on computer, burnout syndrome, joseph abraham
burnout syndrome, joseph abraham, professional guidance: Read about marriage burnout syndrome and ways to overcome it; the topic is too complex to summarize it within 2-3 sentences. Once you feel you need more professional guidance, consult someone yourself; do not wait until he joins. All the best, ...

Marriage: my husband wants to leave me., joseph abraham, marriage counseling
joseph abraham, marriage counseling, support and guidance: Based on your letter, the best advice to you is not to do anything, but to find a local support and guidance resource, that provides marriage counseling. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: my jealous live in partner, signs of an abuser, jealous partner
signs of an abuser, jealous partner, classic signs: Hi Maryjane~ No, whatever you do do NOT go back to this abusive man! He s a controlling abuser and if you keep taking him and he ll keep treating you like this. A man never has a right to put his hands on a woman, period, ever. He belittles and degrades...

Marriage: Having Kids, fianc, personal decision
fianc, personal decision, m 46: Hi Mark~ Having children can be a scary thing for any person to think about. Some ppl were meant to be parents and others not so much. It s really a very personal decision for each individual. But since you agreed to possibly having one child to please...

Marriage: Marriage, self satisfaction, sex etc
self satisfaction, sex etc, married women: Hi Murphy~ There are various reasons for this that I ve heard in talking to women in this situation. Most of the time it s the attention they get from men married or not. They are having problems in their relationship or marriage at the time so they seek...

Marriage: Marriage, marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, counseling service: If the marriage is O.K and satisfactory, I have no idea what to say; ask somebody else or just ignore whoever approaches you. If not, find a local marriage counselor or use my phone counseling service. The sooner you approch the problem(s) - the better....

Marriage: Marriage -repairing and starting to regroup., accidental pregnancy, single mom
accidental pregnancy, single mom, consenting adults: The free reply service is limited to question letters up to 10 lines. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Marrying some one with 11 years of difference, talking to parents, biological child
talking to parents, biological child, family counseling: This free service is not suitable for a complete family counseling. http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Marrying some one with 11 years of difference, indian cultures, talking to parents
indian cultures, talking to parents, biological child: Hi Sandeep~ It s a shame that your parents are acting this way and being stubborn when it comes to your relationship and someone you love and are now married to. Social pressures - As for the social pressures on them and from relatives. I get that...

Marriage: Misunderstanding in Marriage, joseph abraham, life mom
joseph abraham, life mom, private situation: This issue should be resolved between your parents; do not get involved. Your mother should consult a professional; 1-2 sessions can solve the entire problem, once all the info is well gathered and understood. That is why no general / generic relationship...

Marriage: Moving away from his family, wiggle room, seasonal depression
wiggle room, seasonal depression, cold climate: Hi Nancy, You are asking someone who has lived in a cold climate for 28 years and is ready to move to warmer places, so my answer will be biased. At some point, if he wants to build his own family to raise, he ll have to be able to adapt, so I think...

Marriage: marriage law, wonderful marriage, marriage law
wonderful marriage, marriage law, embarrassment: Hi Paula, There is absolutely something you can do, Paula. Perhaps consider the fundamental benefit of telling them the truth. They will be hurt momentarily, but in the end, what matters is that you and your boyfriend are happily married. You are, aren...

Marriage: When will i get married, marriage of convenience, delhi india
marriage of convenience, delhi india, neha: Hi Neha, In all honesty, I have no idea. Perhaps you should redirect the question to someone who can see into the future. I m unable to do so. The only thing I can offer you is that you will get married when the time is ripe, and when you do, I hope...

Marriage: Should I have married, joseph abraham, deep journey
joseph abraham, deep journey, wifely duties: I cannot answer; there is no point of speculating. This question needs a deep journey into your SELF. I assume 2-3 sessions with a professional would reveal a lot. All the best, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com ...

Marriage: How do I overcome my trust issues?, generic guidance, marriage counselor
generic guidance, marriage counselor, joseph abraham: There is no cook-book generic guidance for your case, since the psychological roots for such a behavior and thinking pattern differ among different people. So you may consider spending some money in order to save your marriage; it would be difficult for...

Marriage: PLEASE EXPLAIN, what is a soul mate, soul mates
what is a soul mate, soul mates, wikipedia: See some resources Soulmate - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia soulmate, the one and only other half of one s soul... www.soulmatefilm.com/thetrailer.htm the soul mate notion myth in marriage, along with definitions, perceptions, and challenges...

Marriage: PLEASE EXPLAIN, true soulmate, exact same thing
true soulmate, exact same thing, daunting task: Hi Cameron, That is a daunting task, yet also an easy one. There may be definitions that have been published, but I never looked at any because I think that it is best to define this person yourself. A soul mate is a person that you know can be your...

Marriage: privacy in a relationship, joseph abraham, marriage history
joseph abraham, marriage history, marital relationship: A lot of information regarding your personal ackgrounds, marriage history and current marital relationship is needed in order to explain this issue of trust and privacy and solve it. That is why no general and generic relationship advice is available and...

Marriage: my problem, hurry, feelings
hurry, feelings, convenience: Hi Doaa~ It s much better to be with someone you love and that returns the feelings, than to be with someone just b/c they love you a lot. You d be unhappy if you were to marry someone you just don t love, not to mention that it s not really fair to the...

Marriage: Rules for Separation, 30th birthday party, impending marriage
30th birthday party, impending marriage, sexual relationship: Hi Angela~ A separation doesn t always necessarily mean no contact at all with your spouse while separated. It means that you aren t living together, involved with each other on a daily basis, talking to each other all the time, etc. It basically is...

Marriage: My Soul Mate, figure salary, intimate relation
figure salary, intimate relation, soul mate: Chandani, What I was trying to say and did not do very well is this. If he can move close to you and also be able to get a good job then he should move. If you can move close to him and also be able to get a job then you should move. Also getting together...

Marriage: When do you say "I don't", marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, marriage counseling: Ten years???!!! You need to set a time on your colander; either you start marriage counseling within two weeks, or you start packing. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com ...

Marriage: screwd up, conjugal life, hasty decision
conjugal life, hasty decision, blood relations: Hi Anjana, I do remember you. You did not bother me, as this is what I am here for. I see that you have reached the point where you have understood that you will not change him. At this point, you have a decision to make. I can only tell you to write...

Marriage: Is there such thing as a healthy seperation, adult children of abusive parents, separation period
adult children of abusive parents, separation period, children of abusive parents: Jo, I think that what you are doing is very brave. So many people neglect themselves when it comes to getting right with their life. If you do not know who you are then how can you be anything for someone else? The year separation may be the best thing for...

Marriage: I want to leave my husband, prescription pills, alcoholic family
prescription pills, alcoholic family, twenty five years: Plz Re-write; 10 lines max. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Where do I go from here?, marriage counselor, joseph abraham
marriage counselor, joseph abraham, putting my heart on the line: Theoretically speaking, the Push-Pull theory holds that most deviations from a relationship is not because the person is being pulled (attracted) to a new circumstance or a relationship but mainly because he or she perceives that they are being pushed away...

Marriage: adultry, affairs, infidelity
affairs, infidelity, Doctor Becky: Hi Terry, I feel so badly for you. This is a tough, tough situation, it feels terrible, and unfortunately I don t have simple answers for you. A book I recommend to my clients in these situations is After the Affair by Janis Spring. My clients tell...

Marriage: Caught husband twice cheating, sexual overtones, sex addict
sexual overtones, sex addict, sexual fantasies: Hi Suv~ With his being a cyber sex addict it s a horrible and huge addiction and it s something that he s can t control on his own. This addiction is just as bad as any other addiction out there such as alcoholism, drugs, gambling, porn, etc. He needs...

Marriage: He Cheated, janis spring, college sweetheart
janis spring, college sweetheart, ups and downs: Hi Dawn, I feel sad for you -- I see this sort of thing daily and it is a very complicated and painful dynamic, and is too huge to be solved in an advice letter. What I would do if I were you would be to read the book, After the Affair by Janis Spring....

Marriage: This cant be normal, gambling problem, mother in law
gambling problem, mother in law, 3 years: Hi Annette~ Of course this situation isn t normal, in fact far from it. She s using you and your husband to pay for everything. If she had any money then she wouldn t be asking/wanting you all to stay. With her gambling problem she s probably gone through...

Marriage: child support, child support payments, step parents
child support payments, step parents, legal responsibilities: Hi Harold~ Not likely. The only way that a judge will lower your child support payments are if you have a decrease in your wages. But even so you ll have to take the matter back to court and petition the court to lower the CS for you. Just b/c she remarries...

Marriage: My controlling wife?, abuse marriage, sexual intimacy in marriage
abuse marriage, sexual intimacy in marriage, sexless marriage: Dear Michael, Thanks for writing. I really appreciate that you accept some responsibility for the situation in which you find yourself. That s a great start. Sounds like you have learned that the biggest turn-off for a woman is a man who demands sex...

Marriage: ex wife, sudden discovery, divorce decree
sudden discovery, divorce decree, having a baby: Hi Jessica~ He needs to cut all ties and contact with her period. If she discovered something in the divorce decree, then that s too bad, she needs to deal with that on her own, such as by taking him back to court to deal with it the correct way, not by...

Marriage: Husband cannot leave his mother, mother in law, fresh start
Marriage: Husband cannot leave his mother, mother in law, fresh start, bedrooms

Marriage: is my husband givingup or is it my fault- drugs/depression, willing partner, becky
Marriage: is my husband givingup or is it my fault- drugs/depression, willing partner, becky, sadness

Marriage: Moving away from family after marriage, neutral territory, military reserve
Marriage: Moving away from family after marriage, neutral territory, military reserve, sleepless nights

Marriage: moving from family after marriage, criminal defense attorney, relocation
Marriage: moving from family after marriage, criminal defense attorney, relocation, friends and family

Marriage: Wife puts Husband on Restriction, classic confrontation, golf buddies
Marriage: Wife puts Husband on Restriction, classic confrontation, golf buddies, gps tracking device

Marriage: fiance's personality changing, joseph abraham, testosterone injections
joseph abraham, testosterone injections, low testosterone: There is no ready made cook book solution here. He needs counseling. You need to support him. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com ...

Marriage: Husband asked for a separation, abuse marriage, unhappy marriage
abuse marriage, unhappy marriage, separation: Hi Analise, I am sorry it has taken me days to get back with you, but when I see a long email such as yours I really have to set aside some time to read and consider it before answering. Honestly, it sounds to me like your husband is having an affair....

Marriage: Husband has cheated 3 times, cellular phone bill, gut instincts
cellular phone bill, gut instincts, sex addict: Hi Christine, Sounds to me like you are married to a liar and a cheat, and maybe even a sex addict. I feel for you, because that sort of life would no doubt feel like living in hell. The question is, why do you want to work things out with someone who treats...

Marriage: Husband cannot leave his mother, gambling problem, mother in law
gambling problem, mother in law, length of time: Dear Annette, Sounds like you are at the end of your rope. You have money, and you have options,and you want to be free of the influence of your husband s mother. This means you can do what is healthy for you, and I think you know what that is. If you...

Marriage: My husband's decision, first glance, financial help
first glance, financial help, right decision: Hi Alicia, I m a bit flabbergasted at your husband s action. He is totally out of order with this decision if it was made without consultation with you. By actually having rented the place and moved there, he is forcing you to follow, totally against your...

Marriage: husband is depressed, depression and marriage, divorce decision
depression and marriage, divorce decision, Doctor Becky: Hi Michelle, Nothing is more frustrating and sad than having a spouse who has depression who is not getting it treated at all OR treated successfully. What I know is that if you cannot make him or get him to do anything. Probably the more you try to...

Marriage: is my husband givingup or is it my fault- drugs/depression, codependency, addiction
codependency, addiction, divorce: Hi Brooke, I read most, but not all of your letter. I am sorry, but it is just too long, and I think I get the gist of what you are saying. I hear that you feel you have kicked your drug problem, but you are an addict whether you are using or not. There...

Marriage: husband wants a divorce all of the sudden, heart to heart talk, yr anniversary
heart to heart talk, yr anniversary, marriage work: Hi Sally~ You need to sit down with him and have a serious heart to heart talk with him. He needs to know exactly how this is making you feel. And what you re willing and unwilling to put up with in this marriage. Don t keep begging and pleading for...

Marriage: husbands child support, unsuspecting couples, show cause hearing
unsuspecting couples, show cause hearing, bitter woman: Hi Tenille~ You are NOT, I repeat NOT responsible for paying his child support. They can NOT consider your wages, and it sounds like he had a dirty judge that was bias towards the mother (favoring the mother and saying this b/c she s a woman judge). In...

Marriage: Intimacy concerns, stress and sex, husband too tired for sex
stress and sex, husband too tired for sex, Doctor Becky: Hi Jennifer, How about asking your husband what you should do? Tell him you have some issues to discuss, and need a gentle and appropriate time and space for the discussion. Let him suggest when. Then, when the moment comes, just be gentle and loving all...

Marriage: infidelity, lies, lap dances, moving to montana
lap dances, moving to montana, blah blah: Hi Decor, I am really sorry to hear what you ve been dealing with, but you know what you re dealing with, right? A liar, cheat ... do I need to go on? Some guys don t deserve us, it s plain and simple. Guys who deceive, lie, cheat, and blah, blah, blah...

Marriage: Is he lying?, Doctor Becky, Becky Whetstone
Doctor Becky, Becky Whetstone, Internet porn addiction: Dear Jennifer, I feel really sad for you. Whether or not your husband is lying, at the very least he is immature and controlling. This would be an extremely unpleasant atmosphere for anyone to live in. Is he lying to you about all of his pron searches...

Marriage: Marriage, marriage laws, canada mexico
marriage laws, canada mexico, emory: Hi Emory, You may wish to read the info at this link: http://www.coolnurse.com/marriage_laws.htm Check the last paragraph in the list. Verify those states that may be mentioned there , as it was a 2003 writing. Things may have changed since then....

Marriage: My Marriage, online cheating, emotional adultery
online cheating, emotional adultery, Doctor Becky: Hi Stephanie, Wow, you must feel that your world is coming apart. You ask, are all men like this? No, but many behave like dogs, this is true. How do I know -- because men tell me this! Still, know that there are men out there who are extremely loyal...

Marriage: Marriage advice, divorce, alcohol
divorce, alcohol, counseling: In order to save yourself and your boy you have to run. Do it ASAP and fast. File for a divorce; if he is committed to treatment (long term commitment only) delay the final step. Use the filing process as either as a rope to put around his neck (if he...

Marriage: Marriage, money and tax advice, child support payments, support period
child support payments, support period, arrears: Hi Tricia~ No, none of the 50 states can go by a partner, boy/girlfriend, fiancee, spouse s, etc income. He and he alone is solely responsible for his own child and child support. Even if you marry him they can NOT take any income you have for child support,...

Marriage: Moving away from family after marriage, architectural designer, lack of sleep
architectural designer, lack of sleep, endless nights: Dear Sally, I m so sorry. I realize how hard this must be for you. I know it is difficult to find a happy medium but this is your life and you are the one that is going to live it. You shouldn t settle for something that is only just okay. You will be disappointed...

Marriage: I'm gay, but want a life and marriage with a woman, nobody in mind, deep feelings
nobody in mind, deep feelings, woman question: Hi Jack~ I think that my brother knew all along that he was gay. We suspected he was gay, but never said anything when he was about 19. He met this woman, and we just knew that that marriage wasn t what it seemed, yet we never said anything to him. We...

Marriage: marriage, joseph abraham, marriage counseling
joseph abraham, marriage counseling, devorce: Start the counseling process without him. Relationship is influenced by reciprocal behaviors. Many times the husband do join later. See some case studies in: http://www.dr-joseph.com/online_marriage_Counseling.html All the best, Dr. Joseph...

Marriage: moving from family after marriage, architectural designer, lack of sleep
architectural designer, lack of sleep, endless nights: Plz re-write, limiting your question to 10 lines. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.co...

Marriage: Need an Impartial Point of View, initial appointment, bad stuff
initial appointment, bad stuff, little chance: Hi Niffie, This sounds like a real mess, and I feel badly for you. I wish I could help, but there are so many factors involved and not enough information for me to really comment intelligently. I did want to write you and urge you to get individual...

Marriage: newlyweds in trouble, news husband a jerk, marriage
news husband a jerk, marriage, divorce decision: Hi Melissa, I really feel for you and the situation you are in. And with your husband gone so much, it IS difficult to work through things. I am wondering ... before you married did you discuss what being a husband or wife means? Your hopes, dreams?...

Marriage: Pre-Marital Flirtation, fiancee works, waffle house
fiancee works, waffle house, flirtation: Hi Roger~ She definitely needs to go to her boss about this. His advances like this are not only making her feel uncomfortable about it, they are inappropriate. She needs to ask him to stop in person, if she hasn t already. But she has to tell her boss/supervisor...

Marriage: Am I ready to get married?, household duties, passionate sex
household duties, passionate sex, happy couple: Hi Jenny, At first glance, I have to say that you are far from ready to be married. The first paragraph of your message tells it clearly. One thing you have forgotten is that your needs are based on your beliefs at the moment. You do not want children,...

Marriage: Stressed married life, arrogant attitude, rocky relationship
arrogant attitude, rocky relationship, blank text: Tracey, It seems that you both should take a basic course in ‘my spouse’s psychology’ and this is done by marriage counseling; the process provides opportunity to learn and to change your behavioral patterns as well. Your husband should understand the...

Marriage: secretly videotaped, sexual addiction and marriage, Doctor Becky
sexual addiction and marriage, Doctor Becky: Hi Alicia, Your story is horrifying, and quite frankly, I do not what to tell you. I would certainly confront your husband and tell him what you know and what you saw. I would demand that he join you in therapy to explain himself. A good therapist will...

Marriage: separation, should I stay or go, Doctor Becky
should I stay or go, Doctor Becky: Dear Jennifer, If I were you I would take charge of the situation rather than wait to see what he is going to do. I realize you have ten years of history together and that is difficult to toss aside, but the leaving and coming back, not knowing, confusion,...

Marriage: Wife puts Husband on Restriction, joseph abraham, hearts desire
joseph abraham, hearts desire, day golf: I provide only one free reply. For continues counseling please refer to my site. Regards, Dr. Joseph Abraham http://www.dr-joseph.com ...

Marriage: what is appropriate, inconsiderate husband, marital issues
inconsiderate husband, marital issues, Doctor Becky: Peg, Sounds like your family life isn t going very well. And now, the stress and frustration is hurting your health. Unfortunately, the only thing you can control is you. Your husband is acting disrespectfully and without regard for your feelings. Yes,...

Marriage: Communication problems., emotional abuse in marriage, controlling behavior
emotional abuse in marriage, controlling behavior, marriage issues: Hi Rebecca, What a stressful situation you describe -- I really feel for you. Sounds like after years of emotional abuse you ve disconnected and made a decision to try and survive within your dead marriage. I m not so sure that would be a decision I...

Marriage: Communication problems. Follow Up, health insurance companies, insurance continuing education
health insurance companies, insurance continuing education, going to the dentist: Hi Rebecca, Even though there are people like me who don t accept insurance, there are still plenty of therapists who do. Your insurance company will have a list of providers who are obligated to take the rate your insurance agrees to pay, and who will...

Marriage: child support, injured spouse form, pain in the butt
injured spouse form, pain in the butt, child ren: Hi Tearra~ No, they can NOT take your wages at all. There are laws in place in every state that protect ppl like you in this type of situation. Your significant others child(ren) are NOT your responsibility at all and you have no legal rights to them....

Marriage: confuse how to bring back the trust, female friends, female friend
female friends, female friend, lovemaking: Hi Sindy, I am shocked after reading your letter. I don t see any way you can bring back the trust in your marriage at this point -- what a mess you both have made. I do not mean to disrespect you -- but you describe behavior that is very emotionally immature....